E-Mails Admissable?

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Fl

I'm going to my final hearing in July. I am pro-se.

My ex has admitted to me in emails that he tried to strangle his first wife, and that he doesn't want visitation with our children. I need to know if the e-mails he sent to me are admissable at the hearing as a statement of fact on his part.

Thanks is advance! Any help is appreciated!

PaulaG said:

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Fl

I'm going to my final hearing in July. I am pro-se.

My ex has admitted to me in emails that he tried to strangle his first wife, and that he doesn't want visitation with our children. I need to know if the e-mails he sent to me are admissable at the hearing as a statement of fact on his part.

Thanks is advance! Any help is appreciated!

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Email CAN BE admissible, but the hurdles are substantial. Can you PROVE that the email came from him? Just having his name on the return address isn't sufficient.

As for visitation, that's not particularly helpful. Even in the unlikely case that you could prove the email came from him, he could state that he changed his mind - and the court will give him visitation. If he stated he didn't want CUSTODY and later changed his mind, that might be a bigger deal, but even then, people are allowed to change their mind - up to the point that the judge issues his orders.

If criminal charges were filed against him for assaulting his 1st wife, you may need to turn the emails over to the DA for prosecution.

PaulaG said:

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Fl

I'm going to my final hearing in July. I am pro-se.

My ex has admitted to me in emails that he tried to strangle his first wife, and that he doesn't want visitation with our children. I need to know if the e-mails he sent to me are admissable at the hearing as a statement of fact on his part.

Thanks is advance! Any help is appreciated!

Click to expand...

If those emails are so damaging and so worrysome to you why didn't you give them to law enforcement when he sent them to you?

His first wife actually had a restraining order put on him after they split. And he was picked up by the police outside her house one night. I didn't hear about any of this until he & I split, which was about 15 years later.

He did actually say in his email that he would sign over his parental rights (which I know he can't do in FL, but he lives in VA and probably doesn't know this). He went so far as to tell me that he wanted me to change all the children's last names to my maiden name and to tell them if they ever asked about him that he was dead.

Of course, now he's changing his mind because he was ordered to pay child support...which he isn't doing either, but I do have a contempt motion pending.

As far as proving the emails are from him...I printed them out with the return email, date sent, etc. What else would I need? How do I get it - whatever it is?

I'll be sending him Requests for Admissions hopefully by the end of the week, and have included having him admit his email address. Will this be enough? I was planning on asking him to admit certain statements within the emails, but if I can't submit the emails to the courts if he denies them then I'm not sure what else to do....

Any thoughts?????

Thanks to those who've responded!

Sorry, it's going to take professional help to ensure that the emails are not forged - and even then, it's iffy.

It's not worth the bother. Even if you could prove that he DID say he didn't want visitation at one point, he's entitled to change his mind. It's not going to mean anything in court.

What about using them just to show his mental instability, not necessarily that the facts contained (or stated) are true?

PaulaG said:

What about using them just to show his mental instability, not necessarily that the facts contained (or stated) are true?

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Are you a licensed psychologist? If not, then you're not going to be able to testify that he is mental unstable.

You can testify to thing you actually observed. if you see him acting in a particular way, you can testify to that and the judge will decide if it's meaningful. You can NOT claim that he's mentally unstable without professional testimony.

Again, what are you trying to accomplish? You're going to get the divorce, anyway. Do you think it's going to be easier to collect child support (or alimony, if applicable) if he's in jail? What do you think you will gain?

Of course, it's a moot point because it's unlikely that you'll be able to prove the emails are from him - and they won't get into court, anyway.

I'm trying to protect my daughters from him. He previously tried to sexually assault my then-15 year old, but the charges were eventually dropped because it was a "he said/she said" thing. Last October he suggested taking my then-12 year old daughter shopping at Frederick's of Hollywood. We have two daughters together that are younger, and I don't want them to be put in that kind of situation.

He has a history of anger-induced rages, alcohol abuse and is currently on methadone and still drinking.

Over the course of the last 4 years (that's how long we've been separated) he's sent LOTS of emails about the various situations. That's what I was trying to find out if I can use.

He currently has supervised visitation through a temporary needs order, but has not exercised it once since it was ordered. I want to make sure that the final order maintains the supervised visitation.

Thanks again.

PaulaG said:

I'm trying to protect my daughters from him. He previously tried to sexually assault my then-15 year old, but the charges were eventually dropped because it was a "he said/she said" thing. Last October he suggested taking my then-12 year old daughter shopping at Frederick's of Hollywood. We have two daughters together that are younger, and I don't want them to be put in that kind of situation.

He has a history of anger-induced rages, alcohol abuse and is currently on methadone and still drinking.

Over the course of the last 4 years (that's how long we've been separated) he's sent LOTS of emails about the various situations. That's what I was trying to find out if I can use.

He currently has supervised visitation through a temporary needs order, but has not exercised it once since it was ordered. I want to make sure that the final order maintains the supervised visitation.

Thanks again.

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It doesn't hurt to try to use the emails. Some judges will allow them into evidence, some judges won't. Its hard for anyone other than a local attorney to know whether or not your particular judge will allow them or not.

LdiJ said:

It doesn't hurt to try to use the emails. Some judges will allow them into evidence, some judges won't. Its hard for anyone other than a local attorney to know whether or not your particular judge will allow them or not.

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I'm going to try anyway. I don't think that even local attorney would know the probability of this Judge allowing them due to the fact that he was just put on the bench in January.

Thanks for the reply!

If your hearing is in July you have plenty of time to review Florida Rules of Evidence. The better you properly present your evidence in the context of the rules of evidence, the less likely the judges decision will be arbitrary or a coin toss.

If your ex has an attorney who promptly objects to the emails on one of many grounds, or your ex flatly denies writing them or alleges the emails are altered, the odds are it may not be allowed. Not without an offer of proof that as a practical matter is very difficult to do on this type of evidence.

But you have little to lose by trying. He might admit to writing them...

For many reasons, judges are much less inclined to require supervised visitations on final orders than they are on temporary orders. Even less so if a pro se is making the argument for permanent supervised visitation against the other parent.

PaulaG said:

I'm going to try anyway. I don't think that even local attorney would know the probability of this Judge allowing them due to the fact that he was just put on the bench in January.

Thanks for the reply!

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I would suggest printing out the headers of the emails. Since I don't know what email client you are using, I'd suggest googling for your client +display email headers. Email headers show what email address/ISP/server an email came from (as well as the date and time); they may also contain IP addresses and information that can identify a PC an email came from.