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Drained savings account

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SFOCC

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

I am asking this question on behalf of one of my parents as they are not quite computer literate.

My parents are very close to their retirement age and getting a divorce. Dad had a savings account where a very small portion of his paycheck automatically get deposited when this automatic deposit has been intorduced in his workplace a long time ago. Since it was a small amount, missing that money did not hurt the family finances at the time and since both of them were working, it had never been mentioned.

Now in the stormy days of divorce, it was brought to the table as an asset to be distributed. In years, despite how small the contributions were, the money accumulated, came to thousands of dollars. Or this is how my mom imagined.

The reality was a little different. While their marriage was not doing great in the last few years, dad has pissed off the savings accounts in places like Lake Thaoe and Vegas. Now the money in savings account is only a few hundred bucks.

Is my mom entitled to half of the money that got spent by my dad or will it be too-bad so-sad but you should have kept a tab on that account and a family member got more cash out of community income and nothing more can be done ?

Even though I am posting this question on behalf of my mom here, I am not supporting my mom's side here, because I know in the last few years, she belittled my dad in front of family and friends and alienated him knowingly and she should have seen this coming. So my dad finding an escape in those places is not a surprise to me, but after all money matters are different.

Since they are not rich folks, they are trying to do the divorce without the involvement of pricey attorneys and pretty much agreed on how to distribute the assets, other than this savings account issue and few small memento items of almost no financial value. Does my mom have a legal leg to stand on, when it comes to this spent money ?
 


Antigone*

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

I am asking this question on behalf of one of my parents as they are not quite computer literate.

My parents are very close to their retirement age and getting a divorce. Dad had a savings account where a very small portion of his paycheck automatically get deposited when this automatic deposit has been intorduced in his workplace a long time ago. Since it was a small amount, missing that money did not hurt the family finances at the time and since both of them were working, it had never been mentioned.

Now in the stormy days of divorce, it was brought to the table as an asset to be distributed. In years, despite how small the contributions were, the money accumulated, came to thousands of dollars. Or this is how my mom imagined.

The reality was a little different. While their marriage was not doing great in the last few years, dad has pissed off the savings accounts in places like Lake Thaoe and Vegas. Now the money in savings account is only a few hundred bucks.

Is my mom entitled to half of the money that got spent by my dad or will it be too-bad so-sad but you should have kept a tab on that account and a family member got more cash out of community income and nothing more can be done ?

Even though I am posting this question on behalf of my mom here, I am not supporting my mom's side here, because I know in the last few years, she belittled my dad in front of family and friends and alienated him knowingly and she should have seen this coming. So my dad finding an escape in those places is not a surprise to me, but after all money matters are different.

Since they are not rich folks, they are trying to do the divorce without the involvement of pricey attorneys and pretty much agreed on how to distribute the assets, other than this savings account issue and few small memento items of almost no financial value. Does my mom have a legal leg to stand on, when it comes to this spent money ?
Your father had every legal right to that money. The money that was spent is gone and cannot be "claimed" as a division of assets.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Your father had every legal right to that money. The money that was spent is gone and cannot be "claimed" as a division of assets.
You are probably right...however there are some exceptions to that. If by any chance he was having an affair, and he dissipated the marital asset on the person he was having an affair with, then the wife might have some ammo. Or, if he dissipated the money frivolously AFTER they filed for divorce, she could have some ammo as well.

However otherwise, spending money during the marriage has nothing to do with how assets are divided after the marriage is finished.
 

SFOCC

Junior Member
You are probably right...however there are some exceptions to that. If by any chance he was having an affair, and he dissipated the marital asset on the person he was having an affair with, then the wife might have some ammo. Or, if he dissipated the money frivolously AFTER they filed for divorce, she could have some ammo as well.

However otherwise, spending money during the marriage has nothing to do with how assets are divided after the marriage is finished.
pressed on a sensitive issue here:

my dad does not have a mistress or someone else he was having a relationship on the side, but a man in his late 50s, deprived of sex for god knows how long but my guess is at least 7-8 years, visiting the sin city, possibilities are endless. He actually confided in me in a couple of instances about a "nice younger lady" he met, twice that I know. Would this be taken as an extra-marital affair even though whole thing was a "cash-only transaction" ?
 

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