I have been married for 24 years and I am thinking Iwant a divorice. where do I start? My husband has a good job making $80K Year and I am a realtor bearly making any money $10k, this year, the market sucks right now. I have 3 kids but 2 of them are over 18 and in the military and my youngest is 13. We own a house worth $330k and have a 1st and 2nd mortgage totalling
$262k. My husband has a 401k worth $50k and a really good pension when he retires. I am 44 and he's 46. I have no idea what to expect or where to start.
Ohiogal's questions are a good start - specifically the last one.
However, you need to know the basics that apply in all cases:
1. You will each be entitled to 1/2 of marital assets and 1/2 of marital debt.
2. 24 years is a long term marriage and alimony can be considered. Whether or not you get it will depend on many other factors, some of which are covered in Ohiogal's questions.
3. You need to plan on not staying in the house. Either your stbx will keep it and pay you 1/2 of marital equity from other funds or the house will be sold and you will each get 1/2 of the marital equity.
4. While Ohiogal is right that joint custody is presumed, joint physical custody requires that you work together and either live in the same school district or be willing to transport the child. Once you have the physical custody issue settled, you can look up your state child support calculator online. Even if you have 50:50 physical custody, the person with the higher income may end up paying child support.
5. Make sure you consider the tax deduction issue in the divorce decree. Who gets it? Do you alternate?
6. Do not sign anything without reviewing it with an attorney.
7. The portion of pensions earned during the marriage are usually considered marital assets. You will be entitled to 1/2. However, it often requires a QDRO to get the pension benefits split and you can't always use a QDRO. If he offers to give you cash in lieu of your share of the pension, make sure you have a financial planner look at it because there's a difference between pre-tax (pension) money and after tax (cash) money.
Finally, you're not going to be able to live on $10 K per year. If you believe your earnings will recover soon, that's one thing. But if you don't see that happening, you'll need another job.
