Divorce PA USA

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
PA (Philadelphia)What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
my husband walked out two years ago and will not help to pay for the mortgage or anything else for that matter. I had three girlfriends at the time he left, and will only reply to my emails in an abuse manner saying that I should be able to manage when the truth is I have been left in a house that is not sellable and is geared for a two income family.

Sorry, he had three girlfriends!
the thing is he is working in Iraq with Blackwater. He left to work there three years ago to earn money so that I could stop working overtime (or so I thought) also I started university during this time, which he said he would pay for. Well he did not and I had to leave. Basically, I had been managing the bills with the understanding that he would be providing vacations and pay for the car. It transpires that when he left it was to leave me = except I was not informed about this. Apparently he had gone on line prior to leaving and had joined a site for married people wanting affairs. Hence the three girlfriends. I really want to get the paperwork done and would be willing to settle for a reasonable amount toward the money owed for work done to the house just over two years ago. By the way this was done at his bidding, I would rather have put the money away. Also he earns a lot of money doing what he does. Now he has threatened to move to another state so that he "can get a divorce without my say so and not be responsible for anything".

hartse said:

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
PA (Philadelphia)What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
my husband walked out two years ago and will not help to pay for the mortgage or anything else for that matter. I had three girlfriends at the time he left, and will only reply to my emails in an abuse manner saying that I should be able to manage when the truth is I have been left in a house that is not sellable and is geared for a two income family.

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What do your girlfriends have to do with anything? Are you bisexual? Were you having an affair or three? Your husband doesn't have to pay for anything unless there are court orders mandating that he pay for stuff.

Ohiogal said:

What do your girlfriends have to do with anything? Are you bisexual? Were you having an affair or three? Your husband doesn't have to pay for anything unless there are court orders mandating that he pay for stuff.

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Well, TECHNICALLY, BOTH borrowers are equally responsible to their lender)to make the required mortgage payment. I r5un into this all the time: coborrowers don't want to "be together" and they think leaving the residence somehow makes them suddenly NOT responsible for their mortgage payments. I have several cases where the wive moved out and decided they suddenly had no mortgage responsibility, even though they agreed to take out that mortgage.

Their mortgage agreement doesn't SAY "You only have to make the agreed payments IF you still like your co-borrower enough to still live together".

Poster, I'd strongly suggest finding a roommate (that's what I did when I had more mortgage payment than I could comfortably handle on just my income). You still need to figure out how to cover that payment.

nextwife said:

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Well, TECHNICALLY, BOTH borrowers are equally responsible to their lender)to make the required mortgage payment. I r5un into this all the time: coborrowers don't want to "be together" and they think leaving the residence somehow makes them suddenly NOT responsible for their mortgage payments. I have several cases where the wive moved out and decided they suddenly had no mortgage responsibilty, even though they agreed to take out that mortgage.

Poster, I'd strongly suggest finding a roommate (that's what I did when I had more mortgage payment than I could comfortably handle on just my income). You still need to figure out how to cover that payment.

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But each cosigner on a mortgage is 100% responsible for the mortgage. Not 50% responsible if there are two cosigners. So hubby doesn't have to pay OP a dime. Now what he is beholden to creditors for, he is still beholden. But that doesn't mean he has to pay anything. If OP doesn't pay then both their credit scores tank.

Ohiogal said:

But each cosigner on a mortgage is 100% responsible for the mortgage. Not 50% responsible if there are two cosigners. So hubby doesn't have to pay OP a dime. Now what he is beholden to creditors for, he is still beholden. But that doesn't mean he has to pay anything. If OP doesn't pay then both their credit scores tank.

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Right, they are equally responsible for 100% of the payment.

I just pointed that out because so many people in divorce and separation don't seem to "get" that their existing debt responsibilities are unchanged by any separation, or court agreements about who agrees to pay. The creditor can still hold all their borrowers equally responsible.

nextwife said:

Right, they are equally responsible for 100% of the payment.

I just pointed that out because so many people in divorce and separation don't seem to "get" that their existing debt responsibilities are unchanged by any separation, or court agreements about who agrees to pay. The creditor can still hold all their borrowers equally responsible.

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I would change equally to "each WHOLLY" or "each completely" or "each 100%" -- because equally may imply to some that they only are responsible for 50% of the mortgage. Not that each person bears similar/equivalent responsibility for 100% of the mortgage.

nextwife said:

Right, they are equally responsible for 100% of the payment.

I just pointed that out because so many people in divorce and separation don't seem to "get" that their existing debt responsibilities are unchanged by any separation, or court agreements about who agrees to pay. The creditor can still hold all their borrowers equally responsible.

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Right, but as long as she is paying it, the lender doesn't care about him. They only go after him if she stops paying-which means damage to her credit rating as well as his.

What OP needs to do:

1. File for divorce and ask for a court order on the house and mortgage. If she wants to sell the house, ask the court to determine how the proceeds will be split and who is responsible for any shortfall.

2. Ask the court for temporary orders on support to help with the mortgage payments.

3. Find a way to live within her income. That may mean selling the house and moving to a less expensive place, taking in a roommate, getting a job (or a second job), etc.

I still want to know why girlfriends (three of them) were mentioned.

Never mind. She re-edited the ORIGINAL post. OP please don't re-edit the original post. Just reply with additional information.