What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? MN
My brother was chosen by my father as executor. We've always gotten along fine. My father died in October 2009. My brother did not file the will or appraise the house, vehicles, farm equipment, etc... for months. I asked and tried to help by looking up the tractors on the web, to try to get prices, and suggested he get them appraised. In the meantime, my other brother's son wants the house, so my brother had started tearing things apart, using my father's vehicle (and damaging it). When we refinanced, I asked the executor brother how much it was and should I set up an appt. He said no. The will was finally filed and he applied as executor on May 31. He didn't yet have the house appraisal and went by the property tax statements. The house was finally appraised in April at more than 10% below the property taxes (and with door molding and tools laying all over the kitchen, no walls in back door shed....). He came up last weekend and said we should go through the house. We got through a couple rooms, since he wasn't available until evening. The house is full, and I suggested having an estate sale or auction for the things nobody wants, so my nephew doesn't have to clean it out. That idea was nixed. Later that evening I was talking to my husband, and we came up with the idea of giving one brother the house and all vehicles, equipment, etc...and my executor brother splitting the money. The difference between the money and the house & belongings was $5000. I put it to the executor, who now said we should have the equipment appraised to make sure it was really worth $5000 and my other brother might not want one of the vehicles and he wanted to be fair - and asked me to do it. I said we can make it easy and just do it this way (the one getting the house/contents would come out ahead, he wants the equipment and one vehicle) He said I should arrange for the appraisal (he's out of town). I called my other brother, because he had the keys for the buildings where the equipment was, and I told him my idea. He thought it was great, said something is fair when all parties agree. He ran into my executor brother just before they left town, and talked. When I talked to my executor brother he blew up at me and accused me of wanting the money FAST and I wanted an auction so I could get every penny and that's why I was bugging him about getting probate started. Then his wife said "there's a reason your father picked him and not you". That was all I could take. I would like to renounce my part and have it go to my son or to them, because I feel my good name is ruined and if I take anything at all, they'll be talking forever about what a money grubber I am (the money is for my 9 year old's college fund - just like the money my father gave out to us all when he was alive). I can't believe my brother would even think that - plus he's thought that way for a long time, thinking I was bugging him to get moving on the probate only because I wanted the money. And even when I offered to take the short end of a deal (along with him - he can afford it - I've been out of work for 2 years and have had a temp job for a year (independent contractor - no paid holidays, overtime and no unemployment insurance when it ends). He said he asked me to do one thing and I 'threw a fit' - because I said I couldn't take off work to take care of the appraisal of the equipment. I did for the house appraisal.
I'm so mad, and it's been two days! I can't bear to think of people talking about me like that - I'd rather give up the money. But now my husband and I are in a fight over that! And he won't let me give it up and go to my son, either, he doesn't want it in my son's name. I feel like either doing that or acting like they're accusing me of - insisting on a real evaluation of the assets. It turns out he didn't even look in an online Blue Book for the car and truck values - he just gave an $8000 value for everything, house contents, vehicles (they're old) and a farm tractor and industrial tractor. But I know that wouldn't help and would only give them something to actually point at.
Not sure if anything can be done - guess I'm doubting myself and am confused as to what I should do.
Thanks,
P2
My brother was chosen by my father as executor. We've always gotten along fine. My father died in October 2009. My brother did not file the will or appraise the house, vehicles, farm equipment, etc... for months. I asked and tried to help by looking up the tractors on the web, to try to get prices, and suggested he get them appraised. In the meantime, my other brother's son wants the house, so my brother had started tearing things apart, using my father's vehicle (and damaging it). When we refinanced, I asked the executor brother how much it was and should I set up an appt. He said no. The will was finally filed and he applied as executor on May 31. He didn't yet have the house appraisal and went by the property tax statements. The house was finally appraised in April at more than 10% below the property taxes (and with door molding and tools laying all over the kitchen, no walls in back door shed....). He came up last weekend and said we should go through the house. We got through a couple rooms, since he wasn't available until evening. The house is full, and I suggested having an estate sale or auction for the things nobody wants, so my nephew doesn't have to clean it out. That idea was nixed. Later that evening I was talking to my husband, and we came up with the idea of giving one brother the house and all vehicles, equipment, etc...and my executor brother splitting the money. The difference between the money and the house & belongings was $5000. I put it to the executor, who now said we should have the equipment appraised to make sure it was really worth $5000 and my other brother might not want one of the vehicles and he wanted to be fair - and asked me to do it. I said we can make it easy and just do it this way (the one getting the house/contents would come out ahead, he wants the equipment and one vehicle) He said I should arrange for the appraisal (he's out of town). I called my other brother, because he had the keys for the buildings where the equipment was, and I told him my idea. He thought it was great, said something is fair when all parties agree. He ran into my executor brother just before they left town, and talked. When I talked to my executor brother he blew up at me and accused me of wanting the money FAST and I wanted an auction so I could get every penny and that's why I was bugging him about getting probate started. Then his wife said "there's a reason your father picked him and not you". That was all I could take. I would like to renounce my part and have it go to my son or to them, because I feel my good name is ruined and if I take anything at all, they'll be talking forever about what a money grubber I am (the money is for my 9 year old's college fund - just like the money my father gave out to us all when he was alive). I can't believe my brother would even think that - plus he's thought that way for a long time, thinking I was bugging him to get moving on the probate only because I wanted the money. And even when I offered to take the short end of a deal (along with him - he can afford it - I've been out of work for 2 years and have had a temp job for a year (independent contractor - no paid holidays, overtime and no unemployment insurance when it ends). He said he asked me to do one thing and I 'threw a fit' - because I said I couldn't take off work to take care of the appraisal of the equipment. I did for the house appraisal.
I'm so mad, and it's been two days! I can't bear to think of people talking about me like that - I'd rather give up the money. But now my husband and I are in a fight over that! And he won't let me give it up and go to my son, either, he doesn't want it in my son's name. I feel like either doing that or acting like they're accusing me of - insisting on a real evaluation of the assets. It turns out he didn't even look in an online Blue Book for the car and truck values - he just gave an $8000 value for everything, house contents, vehicles (they're old) and a farm tractor and industrial tractor. But I know that wouldn't help and would only give them something to actually point at.
Not sure if anything can be done - guess I'm doubting myself and am confused as to what I should do.
Thanks,
P2