Laundry list

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? IL

What is the cheapest way to serve her?

How do I initiate proceedings? I'd like to file before her.

We both work. If she gets a lawyer, can I be made to pay for her lawyers services?

She recently moved out of her apartment, it was in my name as were all the bills (her credit is a mess, and she had no income at the time of lease signing), she didn't pay the last months bills, never got services switched off when she moved out, left the place a mess (lost my security deposit), and it's caused no end of troubles for me. I lived there for about five weeks 18 months ago. Can she be made to pay if it's in the papers? Can I write it in as a deduction from her maintenance?

Any help appreciated.

~V

vacren said:

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? IL

What is the cheapest way to serve her?

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Since service is not particularly expensive you want the most effective way, not the cheapest.

How do I initiate proceedings? I'd like to file before her.

Click to expand...

If we are talking about divorce, you file for divorce. It really doesn't matter who files first.

We both work. If she gets a lawyer, can I be made to pay for her lawyers services?

Click to expand...

Maybe. It depends on your respective incomes and the overall facts of the matter.

She recently moved out of her apartment, it was in my name as were all the bills (her credit is a mess, and she had no income at the time of lease signing), she didn't pay the last months bills, never got services switched off when she moved out, left the place a mess (lost my security deposit), and it's caused no end of troubles for me. I lived there for about five weeks 18 months ago. Can she be made to pay if it's in the papers? Can I write it in as a deduction from her maintenance?

Any help appreciated.

~V

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That can certainly be addressed in the property settlement.

I shouldn't have posted angry. We were at an agreement on just about everything then she says she's taking the papers to a lawyer. We were both attempting pro se. I've just had so many of my guys tell me about their wives who went from "just bring me the papers and I'll check them out for you free of charge" turn in to "my rate is only $700/hr, but don't worry, I'll make it so your ex has to pay."

I just hate the thought of seeing the last 18 months of working toward compromise washed away by one visit to a "he gave you everything, but I can get you his future as well" type.

Thanks again for the advice, I'll be at the courthouse bright and early tomorrow.

~V

vacren said:

I shouldn't have posted angry. We were at an agreement on just about everything then she says she's taking the papers to a lawyer. We were both attempting pro se. I've just had so many of my guys tell me about their wives who went from "just bring me the papers and I'll check them out for you free of charge" turn in to "my rate is only $700/hr, but don't worry, I'll make it so your ex has to pay."

I just hate the thought of seeing the last 18 months of working toward compromise washed away by one visit to a "he gave you everything, but I can get you his future as well" type.

Thanks again for the advice, I'll be at the courthouse bright and early tomorrow.

~V

Click to expand...

It REALLY doesn't matter who files first.