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Mediation papers signed, but divorce still put on hold

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tumblez007

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TX

I have been separated from my wife since October 2007. In July 2010, we went through mediation with her lawyer, my lawyer and a mediation lawyer. We reached an agreement, mediation paperwork was signed, and my lawyer said there was nothing that could stop the divorce at this point. There was nothing her lawyer could do to stop it; no reason the judge wouldn't sign off on it. He said it would all complete in a few weeks. Well, I never heard anything from my lawyer (no news is not good news), but finally he contacted me in October to say that her lawyer was not happy with one aspect of the mediation.

During the mediation I agreed to maintain a life insurance policy naming our children as beneficiaries. Their ages are 23, 21 & 19. This insurance policy had been a whole life policy, and it was running me $10k/year to maintain it. After I was out of work for nearly a year, I converted it to term and its cash value will keep it active till 2018. Her lawyer is now insisting I convert it back to whole life and pay the $10k premium. Assume my wife and her lawyer decided on this once they found out I had finally found employment. However, I am a contractor and my employment is not steady. I finish my current job in January 2011 and will be looking for work again after that. My conversion of this policy to term was known during mediation. I don't see how they can force me to do this.

My lawyer just seems to go with the flow and doesn't put up any resistance to their demands. I can't imagine getting a new lawyer now and starting over. Is there any reason my lawyer can't go before the judge and get the judge to sign off on the divorce? She and her lawyer have already signed the mediation documents. I've signed the papers along with my lawyer and the mediator has signed off. I feel like my lawyer is either in cahoots with her lawyer to squeeze me for more money or he is grossly incompetent. Is my lawyer behaving unethically or can my wife's lawyer just put things on hold at his whim? Why can't my lawyer go ahead and file a motion based on the mediation agreement? Must my lawyer wait for her lawyer to give the approval, even though her lawyer signed everything already?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
 


mistoffolees

Senior Member
Yes, your lawyer could go in front of the judge and ask him to sign it. However, your lawyer is in an infinitely better position to know if the judge is likely to sign it than anyone here. What does your lawyer say when you ask that question?

It's rather strange that you're being asked to provide insurance with adult children as beneficiaries (the 19 year old is an adult even though you still have an obligation to support him/her for another 2 years). What's the reasoning behind that?

I'm not sure that converting to a term policy makes any sense, anyway. Based on the age of your kids, you're probably in your late 40s or perhaps 50s. Term insurance starts getting pretty expensive around that age. If you have a guaranteed whole life policy, you may find that keeping the whole life is a better bet. My whole life policy is at the point where I could stop paying the premiums and have the insurance remain in effect for the rest of my life. Or, I could continue to pay the premiums - and the cash value is increasing by more each year than by the amount I pay in premiums. (If money were tight, I could take the cash out at the end of the year and the insurance wouldn't have cost me anything). You really need to discuss this with someone you trust. I'm not accusing your agent of being untrustworthy, but there are some bad ones out there, so make sure you understand all the advice you're getting.
 
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