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Medical Bills And The Ex From Hell...

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Mike Ray

Junior Member
Okay, my child has racked up some medical bills over the last year, running in the thousands of dollars. Of course I am responsible for half of that amount.

Late last year, I lost my job. As a result I have been unable to pay anything on those bills since October.

Today I receive a certified letter from my ex wife, demanding payment in full by Feb 25. All discussions on the matter are requested to be handled through e-mail.

Okay, I don't have the money to pay her. I am wondering a) what does it sound like she is preparing to do? and b) what recourse do I have to defend myself in the event of a court battle?
 


Zigner

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Mike Ray said:
Okay, my child has racked up some medical bills over the last year, running in the thousands of dollars. Of course I am responsible for half of that amount.

Late last year, I lost my job. As a result I have been unable to pay anything on those bills since October.

Today I receive a certified letter from my ex wife, demanding payment in full by Feb 25. All discussions on the matter are requested to be handled through e-mail.

Okay, I don't have the money to pay her. I am wondering a) what does it sound like she is preparing to do? and b) what recourse do I have to defend myself in the event of a court battle?
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Your title is misleading...unless you're referring to yourself...
 
P

Proserpina

Senior Member
Mike Ray said:
Okay, my child has racked up some medical bills over the last year, running in the thousands of dollars. Of course I am responsible for half of that amount.

Late last year, I lost my job. As a result I have been unable to pay anything on those bills since October.

Today I receive a certified letter from my ex wife, demanding payment in full by Feb 25. All discussions on the matter are requested to be handled through e-mail.

Okay, I don't have the money to pay her. I am wondering a) what does it sound like she is preparing to do? and b) what recourse do I have to defend myself in the event of a court battle?
Click to expand...


It sounds as if she's going to take you to court for contempt (non-payment) if you don't pay by X date.

It also sounds like she's given you quite a bit of time to make payment arrangements. Hardly the ex from Hell, frankly.

Have you gone back to court to modify the order based on you being unemployed?

What is your defense?
 
M

Mike Ray

Junior Member
Wow, zigner, that was clever. Did you write that yourself?

Proserpina, up until now we have worked things out between ourselves. While I was unable to make financial payment, I did other favors for her with regard to childcare when she needed it, making sure they got to doctors appointments and school events on days that are normally "her time", and as I had extra money, I did pay for doctors appointments here and there. I tried to pick up the slack in other areas since I knew I couldn't financially.

This letter actually came on the heels of a fairly heated argument three days ago where I ended up having to ask her to leave my home, which tells me it is a revenge thing. I'm just wondering how far she will go and how much of a case she may have.
 
P

Proserpina

Senior Member
Mike Ray said:
Wow, zigner, that was clever. Did you write that yourself?

Proserpina, up until now we have worked things out between ourselves. While I was unable to make financial payment, I did other favors for her with regard to childcare when she needed it, making sure they got to doctors appointments and school events on days that are normally "her time", and as I had extra money, I did pay for doctors appointments here and there. I tried to pick up the slack in other areas since I knew I couldn't financially.

This letter actually came on the heels of a fairly heated argument three days ago where I ended up having to ask her to leave my home, which tells me it is a revenge thing. I'm just wondering how far she will go and how much of a case she may have.
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She has a pretty slam-dunk case, actually. Favors are just that - favors.

You didn't pay per your court order - that's the bottom line.

You didn't answer my other question though.
 
I

Isis1

Senior Member
Mike Ray said:
Wow, zigner, that was clever. Did you write that yourself?

Proserpina, up until now we have worked things out between ourselves. While I was unable to make financial payment, I did other favors for her with regard to childcare when she needed it, making sure they got to doctors appointments and school events on days that are normally "her time", and as I had extra money, I did pay for doctors appointments here and there. I tried to pick up the slack in other areas since I knew I couldn't financially.

This letter actually came on the heels of a fairly heated argument three days ago where I ended up having to ask her to leave my home, which tells me it is a revenge thing. I'm just wondering how far she will go and how much of a case she may have.
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how far she will go? can't say. haven't talked to her and my crystal ball is being serviced for bling.

how far she CAN go? she can file for contempt. and a judge will decide on what enforcements are necessary. a payment plan, a deadline, even a encouragement or two.

i hate to be the one to break this to you, but running an errand, doesn't pay the doctor bills. i'm sure the doctor would agree with me.

and taking the kids to appointments and school fuctions is co-parenting. mom giving you her time makes her awesome. and it still doesn't pay the doctor bills.

so, offer a payment plan, and stick to it.
 
M

Mike Ray

Junior Member
You mean about my defense? Other than not having an income, I don't have one.

I guess I naively assumed that she would extend the same grace to me as I would to her if the situation was reversed.

So if it is a slam dunk case, how would a judge expect me to pay with money I do not have? How would such a case be handled?
 
P

Proserpina

Senior Member
Mike Ray said:
You mean about my defense? Other than not having an income, I don't have one.

I guess I naively assumed that she would extend the same grace to me as I would to her if the situation was reversed.

So if it is a slam dunk case, how would a judge expect me to pay with money I do not have? How would such a case be handled?
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There are absolutely no min-wage jobs?

Are you on UI?

Were you laid off?

Did you file to modify the current order?

Sell your belongings?

Borrow?

Get a loan from family/friends?

Sell your computer?


making an effort to pay is a good thing. But not doing anything about your situation won't help you.
 
M

Mike Ray

Junior Member
Isis1, I'd be glad to offer a payment plan, heck, I'd prefer to pay everything in full. Kinda hard to make payments with money you don't have.

Guess I'll wait and see what she throws at me....
 
Zigner

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Mike Ray said:
You mean about my defense? Other than not having an income, I don't have one.

I guess I naively assumed that she would extend the same grace to me as I would to her if the situation was reversed.
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The situation is not reversed. I am sure that you wouldn't be so eager to pay bills that are not your responsibility without being reimbursed :rolleyes:

[/QUOTE]

After your further posting...I am sure that you were not referring to your ex in your thread title.
 
M

Mike Ray

Junior Member
Actually, zigner, I would pay whatever is required for the welfare of my kids without being concerned about whether or not I were paid back. Hate to burst your stereotyping, but there it is.
 
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Isis1

Senior Member
Mike Ray said:
You mean about my defense? Other than not having an income, I don't have one.

I guess I naively assumed that she would extend the same grace to me as I would to her if the situation was reversed.

So if it is a slam dunk case, how would a judge expect me to pay with money I do not have? How would such a case be handled?
Click to expand...
she DID extend grace to you, you're taking advantage of it. look at it from her point of view. she's been waiting....she let several months go by. but somehow...you still have a place to live, food to eat...and internet to complain about her to.....but you can't pay the bills you owe her....
 
M

Mike Ray

Junior Member
So I'm supposed to not make my house payment or pay my normal bills in the interest of paying her.

Thank you, I will move along now....nothing more to see here....
 
Zigner

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Mike Ray said:
Actually, zigner, I would pay whatever is required for the welfare of my kids without being concerned about whether or not I were paid back. Hate to burst your stereotyping, but there it is.
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...says the guy who doesn't pay. :rolleyes:
 
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