Responsible for gifts/belongings?

[vermillion05]

Hi. I'm in Nevada. Am not sure if this is the category to post this question, but I'll start here.

Our 22 year old son broke up with his girlfriend last month. She is an art student and when she's not in New York studying, she spent much of her time with us at our house. She brought over posters/sketches/doodles and worked on some of this work at our house with my son. She hung some of the work on my son's walls. I considered these whimsical creations a gift. She also had a box of books that she stored with us and an old aquarium.

Last month when they broke up, my son took down all the art/posters/doodles and threw them away and redid his room. The girl's books and the aquarium are still in our garage.

2 days ago her stepmom called and asked that the girl receive back her belongings with an itemized list of all the art creations.

Well. We do not have them anymore. I really did not consider them art in the first place, but rather fun projects that she put together.

Are we in any way responsible to give her the posters/creations back? We can certainly give her the other belongings that we have - but the posters (stuff she calls her art) is gone.

Any and all guides are appreciated. I do not know what to tell them mom, and wanted some advice before I talk to her again.

Thank You!

Sylvia

 

[LdiJ]

Hi. I'm in Nevada. Am not sure if this is the category to post this question, but I'll start here.

Our 22 year old son broke up with his girlfriend last month. She is an art student and when she's not in New York studying, she spent much of her time with us at our house. She brought over posters/sketches/doodles and worked on some of this work at our house with my son. She hung some of the work on my son's walls. I considered these whimsical creations a gift. She also had a box of books that she stored with us and an old aquarium.

Last month when they broke up, my son took down all the art/posters/doodles and threw them away and redid his room. The girl's books and the aquarium are still in our garage.

2 days ago her stepmom called and asked that the girl receive back her belongings with an itemized list of all the art creations.

Well. We do not have them anymore. I really did not consider them art in the first place, but rather fun projects that she put together.

Are we in any way responsible to give her the posters/creations back? We can certainly give her the other belongings that we have - but the posters (stuff she calls her art) is gone.

Any and all guides are appreciated. I do not know what to tell them mom, and wanted some advice before I talk to her again.

Thank You!

Sylvia

The artwork is potentially a problem. Your son shouldn't have thrown them away...particularly not that quickly. However, you don't have any choice at this point but to tell the truth. Its not really your problem, its your son's problem. He is an adult and he is the one who threw them away.

However, aren't you all going to feel really really really foolish if she becomes famous some day.

 

[sandyclaus]

Hi. I'm in Nevada. Am not sure if this is the category to post this question, but I'll start here.

Our 22 year old son broke up with his girlfriend last month. She is an art student and when she's not in New York studying, she spent much of her time with us at our house. She brought over posters/sketches/doodles and worked on some of this work at our house with my son. She hung some of the work on my son's walls. I considered these whimsical creations a gift. She also had a box of books that she stored with us and an old aquarium.

Last month when they broke up, my son took down all the art/posters/doodles and threw them away and redid his room. The girl's books and the aquarium are still in our garage.

2 days ago her stepmom called and asked that the girl receive back her belongings with an itemized list of all the art creations.

Well. We do not have them anymore. I really did not consider them art in the first place, but rather fun projects that she put together.

Are we in any way responsible to give her the posters/creations back? We can certainly give her the other belongings that we have - but the posters (stuff she calls her art) is gone.

Any and all guides are appreciated. I do not know what to tell them mom, and wanted some advice before I talk to her again.

Thank You!

Sylvia

"WE" aren't responsible for the care and handling of items after she and your son broke up. Presumably, as a resident in your home, that duty went to HIM, as they were left in his care and control.

As for whether or not you are responsible to give her back the artwork, that all depends on whether they were given to your son as gifts to keep, or simply put on display in his room while they were together.

If they remained her property and were not given as gifts, then yes, he would be responsible for returning them. As he has disposed of them, he can be held responsible for the consequences of doing so.

If they WERE given to him as gifts, he can pretty much do what he likes with them now that their relationship is over - including tossing them in the trash if he so chooses.

 

[BL]

And gee , unless there is evidence of worth , faggeta bout it.

Tell step ,to step aside and do not contact you again.

 

[latigo]

Hi. I'm in Nevada. Am not sure if this is the category to post this question, but I'll start here.

Our 22 year old son broke up with his girlfriend last month. She is an art student and when she's not in New York studying, she spent much of her time with us at our house. She brought over posters/sketches/doodles and worked on some of this work at our house with my son. She hung some of the work on my son's walls. I considered these whimsical creations a gift. She also had a box of books that she stored with us and an old aquarium.

Last month when they broke up, my son took down all the art/posters/doodles and threw them away and redid his room. The girl's books and the aquarium are still in our garage.

2 days ago her stepmom called and asked that the girl receive back her belongings with an itemized list of all the art creations.

Well. We do not have them anymore. I really did not consider them art in the first place, but rather fun projects that she put together.

Are we in any way responsible to give her the posters/creations back? We can certainly give her the other belongings that we have - but the posters (stuff she calls her art) is gone.

Any and all guides are appreciated. I do not know what to tell them mom, and wanted some advice before I talk to her again.

Thank You!

Sylvia

I’m fully aware that the conventions and sense of sexual propriety in this country have all but vanished since I was growing up in it. But it still troubles me to hear of parents allowing their children to “play house and doctor” under the family roof.

“Shacking up” being the probably now antiquated expression. And if they were not so engaged, whey didn’t she hang the artwork on her “walls”?

Then there may be some that experience vicarious pleasure in visualizing such inevitable clandestine activity.

If you want professional advice in resolving issues that you could have readily avoided, as far as I’m concerned you can pay for it. I’m sure that convention is still around.

 

[quincy]

. . . She is an art student and when she's not in New York studying, she spent much of her time with us at our house. She brought over posters/sketches/doodles and worked on some of this work at our house with my son. She hung some of the work on my son's walls. . . my son took down all the art/posters/doodles and threw them away and redid his room. The girl's books and the aquarium are still in our garage.

. . . .I really did not consider them art in the first place, but rather fun projects that she put together. . . but the posters (stuff she calls her art) is gone.

I find this sad. Most artists put a lot of time and effort into creating their art. For art students, many of their sketches and doodles become the basis for later works. Some early work becomes part of their portfolios. And works that they hang on walls is generally work they are proud to have created.

I recommend that your son return all of the student's items currently stored in your house and then issue to the art student a major apology. For the art student, a monetary loss would be difficult if not impossible to prove, so there is little likelihood of her taking any court action to recover damages for the lost art.

I think this girl was probably lucky to escape a family who apparently had no respect for her work (or for her).

 

[Just Blue]

I find this sad. Most artists put a lot of time and effort into creating their art. For art students, many of their sketches and doodles become the basis for later works. Some early work becomes part of their portfolios. And works that they hang on walls is generally work they are proud to have created.

I recommend that your son return all of the student's items currently stored in your house and then issue to the art student a major apology. For the art student, a monetary loss would be difficult if not impossible to prove, so there is little likelihood of her taking any court action to recover damages for the lost art.

I think this girl was probably lucky to escape a family who apparently had no respect for her work (or for her).

As the Mother of TWO children that have great Art ability...I say Thank You for this thoughtful post.

 

[Proserpina]

As the Mother of TWO children that have great Art ability...I say Thank You for this thoughtful post.

I'll ditto this.

How disrespectful of the OP.

 

[Just Blue]

I'll ditto this.

How disrespectful of the OP.

Actually I think it was OP's little boy that did the disrespectful deed.

But as OP was the parent of this child she is responsible, morally, for his bizarre nasty.