unfair mediation?

[kimr4]

ia

recently we were involved in a situation where a business was being disolved. the other parner, had broken every agreement that was in the partnership agreement, and also comminted numerous frauds - however, after reading alot on mediation- im finding that we were not treated fairly in the process. the mediator, was unproffessional, and coherced us into agreements that we tried to protest.
after it became clear we wernt getting anywhere, we agreed to terms of mediation- just to be done.
now, the other party has not lived up to his end of the agreement- what action can we take to have the mediation agreement voided, and head to arbitration?
as well, as how does one file a complaint against a mediator- who acted more as a dictator then a mediator?

 

[JETX]

Clearly, your issue is going to require a full review of the facts and documents, including the signed mediation agreement. For that, you are going to need to see a local attorney.

 

[HomeGuru]

ia

recently we were involved in a situation where a business was being disolved. the other parner, had broken every agreement that was in the partnership agreement, and also comminted numerous frauds - however, after reading alot on mediation- im finding that we were not treated fairly in the process. the mediator, was unproffessional, and coherced us into agreements that we tried to protest.
after it became clear we wernt getting anywhere, we agreed to terms of mediation- just to be done.
now, the other party has not lived up to his end of the agreement- what action can we take to have the mediation agreement voided, and head to arbitration?
as well, as how does one file a complaint against a mediator- who acted more as a dictator then a mediator?

**A: at the first sign of trouble you could have walked out and said that you needed to contact an attorney in order to continue.

 

[kimr4]

thats where the confusion is-
i have an attorney, 2 actually (very expensive i might add)
and they told us, the best bet would be to mediate- this has been going on since march, first there was alot of back and fourth with "offers" between our attorney, and the other guy, the other guy had locked my husband out of the business, and pretty much dragged our rep through the mud, he was the one that was at fault- but he played unfair, while we attempted to follow the book, and do exactly as our lawyers suggested.
then we got to mediation, our first of course- the mediater, who was also to be the arbitraitor never let us explain our side of things- he became very unproffessional and told us if we didnt agree to certain things the other party wanted, then we had to give on other areas of things we wanted.
he would also make statements such as
" I cant make anyone do anything" and turn around 5 min later and make more statements telling us, we had to agree to such things.
for instance, after the date we were locked out of the business- there was a double billing for 10,000 to a customer that we only handle, he doesnt have access too- but he was the only one with access to the company PC, and therefore was the only one who could have did the second billing, the money was deposited into a checking acct, we had no access too- therefore we were in no way responsable, and the mediator told us, we were responsable for half the billing- of course we never agreed to it, and in the end, the partner has to pay it, but when i tried to point the proof out to him, he wouldnt listen, said he wasnt interested.
i like my lawyers, at this point, i want to make sure i am being told the right things- again i understand this isnt legal advice to be acted upon- but before i go to my lawyers and have to pay more, when i cant really afford it right now, i want to make sure i have my facts straight, so im not wasting, more time, and more money
sorry its so long!
thanks

 

[JETX]

Okay, my most logical question is... what do you expect from this forum?? You already have two attorneys that are either involved or aware of the facts of your issue. And now you seem to be expecting some magic 'law fairy' to step forward and wave his/her wand and solve all the problems.
Simply, either you are misunderstanding what the attorney(s) are saying, or mis-stating what they are saying, or they are incompetent. No one on this forum can determine which.

Some of 'our' (at least my confusion) on this is your inconsistent use of terms. You said, "the mediater, who was also to be the arbitraitor". These are two entirely separate actions. A MEDIATOR is usually a lawyer or retired judge but can be a non-attorney specialist in the subject matter (like child custody) who tries to bring people and their disputes to early resolution through a conference. The mediator is an active participant in the discussions and attempts to work out a solution, unlike an arbitrator, who sits as a judge. Whereas an ARBITRATOR is one who conducts an arbitration, and serves as a judge who conducts a "mini-trial," somewhat less formally than a court trial. His 'ruling' is usually binding on all parties (depending on the arbitration agreement).

You said, "he became very unproffessional and told us if we didnt agree to certain things the other party wanted, then we had to give on other areas of things we wanted." That is one of the entire purposes of the mediation process, to allow some give-and-take to attempt to resolve the process. If you were not willing to 'give anything' what is the incentive for the other party to even mediate??? Clearly, you went into this mediation without sufficient knowledge of what the process is or how it is done.

If you are insistent that it is YOUR way or no way and you are not willing to give anything to resolve this matter, the only recourse you have is to pony up the money and file a lawsuit. Let the court decide the 'victor'.

 

[kimr4]

well, first of all, im asking, so i can better understand certain issues-
i was always told, the only stupid question, is the one that doesnt get asked.
my lawyers seem to be doing what they were hired for, but one aproach they like to take, is to ask me/us, what steps we want to take, and then they advise us on that, what i expect from the nicer people on this board, is to help me understand if what i feel is a good route, is infact a possible route- this is a free board, that seemed to take an aproach to help regular people such as myself to udnerstand the law, in terms that are not full of legal talk, and to give it to me straight.
and finally, i did not expect a magic wand to be waved- or i wouldnt have gotten an attourney to begin with, what i expected was the law to back up those who had followed it, and to be able to tell our side of the issues to a fair unbiased party instead i got a person, who wouldnt know fair if it bit him in the butt-
oh, and before i forget, ill explain, that we had initiated arbitraition, the other party picked one off of a list, his name was dick caulkins, incase you want to check my facts.
eventually the other party asked us to consider mediation, and we agreed, the arbitraitor who was already assigned- then took the role as the mediator, therefore making him the same person, wearing 2 different hats.
now i believe my question was, is there a process for a person to go through, if they feel the mediator was biased, and didnt perform the job of mediation fairly to all parties concerned?
please, if you dont mind, dont treat me as im stupid, because im not familar with the more hidden, confusing aspects of the law-
and do not talk to me as if im a small child, i came here for good knowlege and explanation of the law, and the workings of mediation- not to be treated with disrespect.
if you cant treat me, the way i want to treat you, then please dont bother answering me-
i have enough problems right now, without adding sarcasim to the list
thankyou

 

[JETX]

Okay, I will respond in kind... feeding you every morsel....
"is there a process for a person to go through, if they feel the mediator was biased, and didnt perform the job of mediation fairly to all parties concerned?"
*** Yes.
Next question.

 

[HomeGuru]

well, first of all, im asking, so i can better understand certain issues-
i was always told, the only stupid question, is the one that doesnt get asked.
my lawyers seem to be doing what they were hired for, but one aproach they like to take, is to ask me/us, what steps we want to take, and then they advise us on that, what i expect from the nicer people on this board, is to help me understand if what i feel is a good route, is infact a possible route- this is a free board, that seemed to take an aproach to help regular people such as myself to udnerstand the law, in terms that are not full of legal talk, and to give it to me straight.
and finally, i did not expect a magic wand to be waved- or i wouldnt have gotten an attourney to begin with, what i expected was the law to back up those who had followed it, and to be able to tell our side of the issues to a fair unbiased party instead i got a person, who wouldnt know fair if it bit him in the butt-
oh, and before i forget, ill explain, that we had initiated arbitraition, the other party picked one off of a list, his name was dick caulkins, incase you want to check my facts.
eventually the other party asked us to consider mediation, and we agreed, the arbitraitor who was already assigned- then took the role as the mediator, therefore making him the same person, wearing 2 different hats.
now i believe my question was, is there a process for a person to go through, if they feel the mediator was biased, and didnt perform the job of mediation fairly to all parties concerned?
please, if you dont mind, dont treat me as im stupid, because im not familar with the more hidden, confusing aspects of the law-
and do not talk to me as if im a small child, i came here for good knowlege and explanation of the law, and the workings of mediation- not to be treated with disrespect.
if you cant treat me, the way i want to treat you, then please dont bother answering me-
i have enough problems right now, without adding sarcasim to the list
thankyou

**A: On behalf of the freeadvice website, I apologize for the way that JETX made you feel in talking to you as if you were like a small child. JETX should have written his response in a way only a large child such as yourself could understand. He will be personally reprimanded. Thank you for your cooperation.

 

[JETX]

Ouch!!
Ouch!!
Ouch!!
Damn, three 'licks' for insubordination!!

I am still waiting patiently for your next question.

 

[kimr4]

**A: On behalf of the freeadvice website, I apologize for the way that JETX made you feel in talking to you as if you were like a small child. JETX should have written his response in a way only a large child such as yourself could understand. He will be personally reprimanded. Thank you for your cooperation.

Im going to refrain from stooping to a very low level at this point, because from where i stand, your already there-
being somewhat familar with message boards, i can tell by your profile and member status, that you are in no position to reprimand anyone, and if you dont have anything of value to add, please refrain from posting.
im guessing from your attitude that your looking for an argument of some sort, and I wont add any more fuel to the fire- i have learned from my years of being a mother, to small children, that if you walk away, the argumentive party loses the prize.
now back to the actual reason i came to this area, was if there is infact such a process, would someone take the time to let me know what it is?
and for future reference- friendliness never hurts

 

[HomeGuru]

Im going to refrain from stooping to a very low level at this point, because from where i stand, your already there-
being somewhat familar with message boards, i can tell by your profile and member status, that you are in no position to reprimand anyone, and if you dont have anything of value to add, please refrain from posting.
im guessing from your attitude that your looking for an argument of some sort, and I wont add any more fuel to the fire- i have learned from my years of being a mother, to small children, that if you walk away, the argumentive party loses the prize.
now back to the actual reason i came to this area, was if there is infact such a process, would someone take the time to let me know what it is?
and for future reference- friendliness never hurts

**A: JETX, she's all yours.

 

[JETX]

But, I don't want her!! Like any unreasonable child that thinks things aren't 'fair', she continues to argue and argue irrelevant issues just hoping that something 'sticks'.

On top of that, her grammar is so terrible that it takes several 're-reads' of her post to try to figure out what she is saying. She seems to insist now that the forum follow HER self-imposed rules of only answering THE question she asks... and when I did that, she didn't ask any additional question. So, at this point, I guess she is done.

Let me try to put here continuing diatribe into a more concise message:
" 'We' were dissolving a partnership. We agreed to arbitrate/mediate (Can't figure out which!). The mediator wanted us to negotiate. We refused. We think he was unfair in expecting us to give anything in the 'mediation' process. On top of all that, two attorneys that we picked are incompetent! (Again, I think we can see the problem here....). What do I do??"

Got it so far???

ANSWER: We are not the 'law fairy' with a magic wand!! (Though if I was, I would likely hit you in the head with it.... hoping to put a little common sense in there).
File a lawsuit!!!
Are you from New York???

 

[HomeGuru]

Hahaha, too funny.
I got a better place for that magic wand.

 

[kimr4]

i asked what is the steps, that a person would follow, if they feel that a mediation process was not followed- and the final outcome was unfair?
if you cant answer that, then please do not bother anymore, and let an actual human beaing take a chance.

* btw, I seriously hope your not a lawyer- and not involved with any sort of process that deals with real people, as your attitude stinks, and you mannerism towards others, is in the crapper.
consider buying yourself some new cheap suits, and become a used car salesman
thanks for the help- im going to wait and see if anyone who actually knows the law can advise!

 

[HomeGuru]

What the heck is a human beaing?