Caregiver -vs- disinherited children

[viking400]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Florida

I've been a very close friend to an 85 yr old neighbor for the past 5 years. He divorced a year ago and has 3 grown children. His relationship with his children has been distant and contentiuos at best for many years. None have helped him in any manner, he's had no interaction & very little contact with them for several years. He's still relatively healthy, independent and mentally sharp, but I can see myself soon transitioning into a caregiver role for him.

He's recently removed all 3 kids from his Will and made me his Executor. After much resisting on my part, he's persistent and clear that he wants to include me in his new Will (along with a few select Grandchildren) while he's still healthy and mentally sound. The problem is he/we don't know how to proceed with a "bulletproof" Will/Trust that includes me, AND gives absolutely NO legal recourse to his kids after his passing. He intends to leave me a monetary gift or deed (full or part) to his house etc. Would a separate "living trust" provide the best protection for his wishes, or should he sell/deed over all/part of his house to me now or should we form a partnership/corp for the deed ?

I, obviously require a rock solid agreement also to avoid any/all future recourse from his family (deep pockets and known to litigate) with false accusations of "undue influence", "mental capacity" etc. I know there are Elder laws in Florida regulating such actions too.

Where should we begin ?
-Thanks

 

[divgradcurl]

Where should we begin ?

A lawyer specializing in estate planning. What is the "best" solution will require someone to review ALL of the facts of the situation -- anything less will just be a guess.

 

[BlondiePB]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Florida

I've been a very close friend to an 85 yr old neighbor for the past 5 years. He divorced a year ago and has 3 grown children. His relationship with his children has been distant and contentiuos at best for many years. None have helped him in any manner, he's had no interaction & very little contact with them for several years. He's still relatively healthy, independent and mentally sharp, but I can see myself soon transitioning into a caregiver role for him.

He's recently removed all 3 kids from his Will and made me his Executor. After much resisting on my part, he's persistent and clear that he wants to include me in his new Will (along with a few select Grandchildren) while he's still healthy and mentally sound. The problem is he/we don't know how to proceed with a "bulletproof" Will/Trust that includes me, AND gives absolutely NO legal recourse to his kids after his passing. He intends to leave me a monetary gift or deed (full or part) to his house etc. Would a separate "living trust" provide the best protection for his wishes, or should he sell/deed over all/part of his house to me now or should we form a partnership/corp for the deed ?

I, obviously require a rock solid agreement also to avoid any/all future recourse from his family (deep pockets and known to litigate) with false accusations of "undue influence", "mental capacity" etc. I know there are Elder laws in Florida regulating such actions too.

Where should we begin ?
-Thanks

You need to become very familiar with Chapter 415 of FL Statutes regarding Elder Abuse. Certainly a person has the right to leave his/her property to whomever one wants. You have stated that you SOON will be transitioning into the role of caregiver for this person. Someone that needs a caregiver soon is what the state and family can/will view as being a "vulnerable adult". An 85 year old person that has all his/her "faculities" knows what he/she needs to do to disinherit the children, especially when that person previously has executed a valid will (which is not having the beneficiary find out what needs to be done).

 

[Dandy Don]

Yes, a certified financial planner or estate planner can best advise on the language to use to make it ironclad, though there is nothing you can do to absolutely prevent them from filing suit. Might be wise to put all assets into the trust and completely avoid probate and an expensive will contest.

I think it's a mistake to completely cut the kids out, although he is free to do so if he wishes. By leaving them a nominal amount ($1.00, $100, or $1,000), along with mentioning the reasons for his dissatisfaction with the children, it makes his intentions clear about the reasons for disinheriting them and therefore makes it less vulnerable to being contested.

DANDY DON IN OKLAHOMA ([email protected])

 

[seniorjudge]

"...After much resisting on my part, he's persistent and clear that he wants to include me in his new Will (along with a few select Grandchildren) while he's still healthy and mentally sound...."

Make sure you never talk to any of his lawyers and don't go to the lawyer's office with him.

Make sure you follow the FL laws about taking advantage of old folks.

"...After much resisting on my part, he's persistent and clear that he wants to include me in his new Will (along with a few select Grandchildren) while he's still healthy and mentally sound...."

Doesn't sound like you resisted very much.

 

[BlondiePB]

Make sure you never talk to any of his lawyers and don't go to the lawyer's office with him.

Make sure you follow the FL laws about taking advantage of old folks.

Doesn't sound like you resisted very much.

Good points, sj. IMO, the OP has already assumed doing things that would be considered as caretaking. An 85 year old elder does not just all of a sudden "soon" require a caretaker unless it is due to a medical emergency/crisis. When the family finds out, all h*ll is going break loose. Also according to FL statutes, this neighbor has a legal duty to notify APS.

 

[viking400]

Thanks all for your input.
I'll make sure he visits his estate/elder law attorney on his own accord to execute his documents. I'll also suggest to him he should include a nominal amount for his disenherited children. My entering a care-taker role was perhaps a bit premature - he's still quite healthy (driving, riding bike etc). My final ? is when exactly does my role as a good friend/neighbor end and my legal (fudiciary ?) role as care-taker begin with him ? (Chapter 415 appears vague on definition of "care-giver"). Does he need to first be declared mentally / physically dependent by a doctor, at which time I would notify APS, or ?

 

[BlondiePB]

Thanks all for your input.
I'll make sure he visits his estate/elder law attorney on his own accord to execute his documents. I'll also suggest to him he should include a nominal amount for his disenherited children. My entering a care-taker role was perhaps a bit premature - he's still quite healthy (driving, riding bike etc). My final ? is when exactly does my role as a good friend/neighbor end and my legal (fudiciary ?) role as care-taker begin with him ? (Chapter 415 appears vague on definition of "care-giver"). Does he need to first be declared mentally / physically dependent by a doctor, at which time I would notify APS, or ?

You're welcome.

Litmus (sp) test time, viking:

Do you help/do any (and how many) of the following for your neighbor: shopping, drive to stores, doctors, and/or errands; laundry, bathing, getting him dressed, cooking, cleaning his house, set up his medication (in those daily containers for 7 days), check writing, help with his mail, etc.

 

[seniorjudge]

Q: Does he need to first be declared mentally / physically dependent by a doctor, at which time I would notify APS, or ?

A: Two doctors, independent of each other. One exam with both doctors before he executes will and stuff and one exam with both doctors after the executes the will and stuff.

 

[BlondiePB]

Q: Does he need to first be declared mentally / physically dependent by a doctor, at which time I would notify APS, or ?

A: Two doctors, independent of each other. One exam with both doctors before he executes will and stuff and one exam with both doctors after the executes the will and stuff.

Good idea, sj. The litmus test is for at what point viking, who is uncertain, needs to call APS as is his/her legal duty under Chpt. 415 of the statutes.