Custody

[Shel77]

What is the name of your state? Florida

I know I posted this on the other forum but I am new to this site and did not know this forum was here; maybe I will get some help here instead of being accused of not loving my son. Or not correctly picking my husband, really that’s the help I got.

I wanted to see if there was a way to assign custody to my mother in the event that my husband and I both passed away, on the other forum they said no but I could state a preference, not that it would be a guarantee. Would my son go to a 'state home' during this process or if I said he should go to my mother would he automatically get placed with her even prior to assigning custody? What if other family members put in for custody as well? I have reasons that I don't want some of our other family members to have custody would it be a good idea to put that into documentation as well. My mother would not be able to state these reasons because she does not know them (my in-laws) she’s met them but could not state anything related to how they live their lives or how they have raised their children. Thanks so much.

 

[seniorjudge]

Q: I wanted to see if there was a way to assign custody to my mother in the event that my husband and I both passed away, on the other forum they said no but I could state a preference, not that it would be a guarantee.

A: And none of that has changed.


Q: Would my son go to a 'state home' during this process or if I said he should go to my mother would he automatically get placed with her even prior to assigning custody? What if other family members put in for custody as well? I have reasons that I don't want some of our other family members to have custody would it be a good idea to put that into documentation as well. My mother would not be able to state these reasons because she does not know them (my in-laws) she’s met them but could not state anything related to how they live their lives or how they have raised their children.

A: Your son, if both of y'all are gone, will go where the court finds it is in the best interests of that child to go. No one can know the answers to these questions since they are hypothetical and their answers depend on conditions that are not now in existence. If you have bad people who might want to get your kid, now is the time to document it and place the documentation with a trusted lawyer.

 

[Shel77]

I know this will sound a bit crazy but what if we assigned custody to my mother now? Then if something happened to us she would already have custody, right? I am not saying we are going to do this but I was wondering if it would work. We may be going overseas for a week or two and you never know what could happen. I have heard some crazy things from other missionaries.

 

[seniorjudge]

I know this will sound a bit crazy but what if we assigned custody to my mother now? Then if something happened to us she would already have custody, right? I am not saying we are going to do this but I was wondering if it would work. We may be going overseas for a week or two and you never know what could happen. I have heard some crazy things from other missionaries.

I am not sure what you mean by "assigning custody".

If you mean both of y'all want to give up your parental rights and have mom adopt them, I guess you could try that.

If you mean you want to give a power of attorney to mom for custody of the kids, you can do that. Most state laws limit such a power of attorney for a specific amount of time.

If you mean you want mom to be guardian/conservator of your kids because y'all cannot or will not take care of them, you could try that too.

In any event, none of this overrides what I told you earlier:

Your son, if both of y'all are gone, will go where the court finds it is in the best interests of that child to go. No one can know the answers to these questions since they are hypothetical and their answers depend on conditions that are not now in existence. If you have bad people who might want to get your kid, now is the time to document it and place the documentation with a trusted lawyer.