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Self dealing PR?

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T

techteach

Guest
What is the name of your state? Virginia

Mother in Law (MIL) passed away @1 ago. Two daughters are heirs. One is my wife. Sister in law (SIL) moved in 4 years ago expecting quick death and enrichment. No rent or helping with utilities. Then new hubby moved in and both with full time jobs.

Prior to passing MIL asked my wife to help find assisted living accomadations as way to get MIL out of current situation without offending SIL. Before this could happen she went into the hospital where she passed away.

SIL was named PR per will. Estate is in probate. No mortgage. SIL still living rent free with stated intentions to stay in house 5 years. After much contention house is now on the market with a clause stating SIL to find housing of her choice before sale is final. This could drag on forever. Meanwhile items keep disappearing from house.

Is this self dealing? Should my wife seek legal counsel of her own?
 


Dandy Don

Senior Member
It is self-dealing and possibly theft, but you won't be able to prove anything since no one has taken a videotaped inventory of items in the house.

What does the will say about who gets the personal possessions in the home? It may not be self-dealing if they go to the executor.
 
T

techteach

Guest
No specifics as far as distribution. Will specifies entire estate is to be divided 50-50 between the two daughters. The financial advisor used by MIL recommended she change the will to specify house must be sold to settle estate. Her health went downhill to fast after that for her to change it.

SIL is also going over old financial statements and dredging up purchases and expenditures made prior to MIL passing. Accusing wife of stealing while MIL was living. Wife transported for all doctor visits at MIL request. Purchased Rx and groceries for MIL using MIL checks and/or charge card. Wife was on account at MIL request. Wife also cleaned MIL house weekly because SIL and hubby would not.

SIL was disposing of household items before passing. One instance the basement was cleaned out and set outside for a charity pickup. MIL assumed it was her daughters belongings. When my wife went over for daily visit she inquired why certain items were out for charity. That prompted both to go outside and MIL directed much to be returned to the basement.

MIL insisted we transfer her car to her name (unable to drive). SIL was using car as a truck to tend to a horse she boards elsewhere. Odor of tack locked in hot car/trunk had adverse effect on breathing. MIL had emphysema. We would not accept gift. I insisted we purchase car which we did.

Wife is very upset and to trusting. My opinion as I explained to her is unless it was criminal in nature, events/expenditures prior to passing have no bearing on disbursement of the estate.

I keep urging wife to get her own legal counsel. She wants me to get involved. I do not believe I have any legal right other than support for my wife. Much of what we have is she said-she said and conversations MIL had with friends and neighbors. Documentation is controlled by SIL.
 

Dandy Don

Senior Member
Since probate dealings are a new area for you and your wife, there is much to be gained by just at least talking with a probate attorney for an hour or two just to find out what your options are. This SIL looks mean so this is going to be a somewhat difficult probate--if she is selling the items and putting the money into an estate account, that would be the ethical thing to do, but just walking off with items that she doesn't account for is not very honest.
 
T

techteach

Guest
SIL is mean. Has been since a nasty divorce 10-12 years ago. As far as household items. Been disappearing since the day she moved in. Money does not go into estate account.

SIL does not recognize the estate as a separate entity. She is 50% heir so it is already hers. Inventory was taken but that does not stop her. I suggested an auction or estate sale and was slam dunked.

Feeling things would transpire this way we asked for MIL to give everything to Greenpeace. She liked the idea but wanted her daughters to have everything and thought it would be a way to get the sisters back together.

Thanks for the input. Sometimes one just needs a sounding board. I will urge my wife to get to a probat attorney.
 

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