Step-mother is trying to take everything

[Workingmother]

What is the name of your state? Illinois

My FIL (father-in-law) remarried a few years ago, after my husbands mother died, and now we are dealing with two issues:

1) First of all, my FIL was put in a nursing home without any notification. FIL's wife wants to take his house and all his assets, and has put him in various nursing homes since April. She refuses to tell us where he's at because she has now concocted some crazy story that my husband never called his father enough and never called him "Dad" (which is so not true), so she believes my husband doesn't deserve to know. The whole behavior on her part is just totally bizarre. Does my husband have a legal right to find out what nursing home his Dad is at?

2) We are pretty sure FIL's wife had him change his will to exclude his only child, my husband, because she knew that my FIL was suffering from dementia and wanted all of his assets for herself. Does my husband have any legal recourse if he is written out of the will?

3) In the state of Illinois, do all assets automatically go to the wife? We have no idea what my FIL will states (or if he even has one).

4) We would like all of his hard earned money and his equity on his home to go to his care. The step-mother said she was going to move around assets -- do some things -- not quite sure what as this was our last converstation and she has refused to talk to us since, that she was going to put FIL on some sort of state aid where she would be able to keep the house. We don't want him in a state institution, we want his assets to go towards his care as he always dreamed of retiring in a certain private nursing home. I know she stuck him in the biggest hell-hole she could find. Do we have any legal recourse in freeing up some of his own money for his care, or does the wife get to keep it all and make all of those decisions, even if it's not in his best interest?

Thanks!

 

[Betty]

What is the name of your state? Illinois

My FIL (father-in-law) remarried a few years ago, after my husbands mother died, and now we are dealing with two issues:

1) First of all, my FIL was put in a nursing home without any notification. FIL's wife wants to take his house and all his assets, and has put him in various nursing homes since April. She refuses to tell us where he's at because she has now concocted some crazy story that my husband never called his father enough and never called him "Dad" (which is so not true), so she believes my husband doesn't deserve to know. The whole behavior on her part is just totally bizarre. Does my husband have a legal right to find out what nursing home his Dad is at?

2) We are pretty sure FIL's wife had him change his will to exclude his only child, my husband, because she knew that my FIL was suffering from dementia and wanted all of his assets for herself. Does my husband have any legal recourse if he is written out of the will?

3) In the state of Illinois, do all assets automatically go to the wife? We have no idea what my FIL will states (or if he even has one).

4) We would like all of his hard earned money and his equity on his home to go to his care. The step-mother said she was going to move around assets -- do some things -- not quite sure what as this was our last converstation and she has refused to talk to us since, that she was going to put FIL on some sort of state aid where she would be able to keep the house. We don't want him in a state institution, we want his assets to go towards his care as he always dreamed of retiring in a certain private nursing home. I know she stuck him in the biggest hell-hole she could find. Do we have any legal recourse in freeing up some of his own money for his care, or does the wife get to keep it all and make all of those decisions, even if it's not in his best interest?

Thanks!

#1 Do you know where FIL & his wife live - check the nursing homes in that area. Of course, you could also hire a lawyer or private investigator to help locate him.

#2 & 3 - in #2 you indicate you are pretty sure FIL's wife had FIL change his will to eliminate his son. However, in #3 you indicate you are not even sure FIL has a will. If will was changed to eliminate son, it would have to be proven that he was mentally incompetent when it was changed & that his wife had him change it to benefit her. If he didn't have a will, in Il. half of the estate goes to the wife & the other half to any child/children. If there is a will, it is followed as written though can be contested.

#4 I wonder if wife has medical/financial POA for handling her husband's medical/financial affairs. You would have to prove that she is abusing her power in order to get her removed from this position.

add'l. info: Your FIL could have changed his will to his new wife when he married her but, of course, he would have had to been competent at the time.

 

[lwpat]

Sounds like you husband needs to take care of his father. Find out where he is and get him to give your husband a POA revoking all previous POA's. A new will can also be drawn up if he is competent. You will need the assistance of a good elder care attoreny.

 

[Betty]

Also see http://www.forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=366777