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under age legal rights for Dads ashes

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Cheyenne hughes

Junior Member
Washington State: My daughter is 16yrs old and just lost her father. We went to the funneral home to get his ashes and was told that they could not release them to her. Her Dads sister who lives in Georga state called and told them to release the ashes to Jacks step father who has no legal binding to Jack. My daughter was told that she has no legal rights as his only decendent because she is under age and that Jacks sister Mindy is the only legal next of kin. What can I do to help my daughter get her Dads ashes.
 


Silverplum

Senior Member
Washington State: My daughter is 16yrs old and just lost her father. We went to the funneral home to get his ashes and was told that they could not release them to her. Her Dads sister who lives in Georga state called and told them to release the ashes to Jacks step father who has no legal binding to Jack. My daughter was told that she has no legal rights as his only decendent because she is under age and that Jacks sister Mindy is the only legal next of kin. What can I do to help my daughter get her Dads ashes.
Sue everybody involved.
 

Isis1

Senior Member
Washington State: My daughter is 16yrs old and just lost her father. We went to the funneral home to get his ashes and was told that they could not release them to her. Her Dads sister who lives in Georga state called and told them to release the ashes to Jacks step father who has no legal binding to Jack. My daughter was told that she has no legal rights as his only decendent because she is under age and that Jacks sister Mindy is the only legal next of kin. What can I do to help my daughter get her Dads ashes.
if mindy is the only legal next of kin, then the ashes go where she says they go.

you'll need to discuss this with mindy.
 

Cheyenne hughes

Junior Member
if mindy is the only legal next of kin, then the ashes go where she says they go.

you'll need to discuss this with mindy.
My daughter did descuse it with her Aunt Mindy, the agrement was that my daughter and Mel would meet at the funeral home and devide the ashes, thats what we thought we were going there for. Unbenosed to us, Mindy did this behind my daughters back. Mindy hasnt seen her brother in probably 10 yrs or more, and my daughter was the light of her Dads life, how is this right.
 

xylene

Senior Member
I'm assuming Jack is the deceased party.

You are this girls mother - who are you to the deceased, (who is her father?)?

If Mindy is the legal next of kin, it is her call.
 

Cheyenne hughes

Junior Member
Jack is My daughters father. Jack and I were in a relationship years ago, and we have been friends for 30 years, and yes I am her mother. So you are saying that my daughter who is Jacks only decendent has no rights to her fathers ashes.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Jack is My daughters father. Jack and I were in a relationship years ago, and we have been friends for 30 years, and yes I am her mother. So you are saying that my daughter who is Jacks only decendent has no rights to her fathers ashes.
Was paternity ever actually established (legally)?
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
If you (your daughter) wants the ashes, then you should retain an attorney to assist (possibly even just for a letter). A strongly worded letter from an attorney might just change the funeral home's tone...
 

xylene

Senior Member
If you (your daughter) wants the ashes, then you should retain an attorney to assist (possibly even just for a letter). A strongly worded letter from an attorney might just change the funeral home's tone...
1. I highly doubt a funeral home is going to release human remains to the exclusive control of a minor, under any circumstances.

2. It would seem that the cremains are already in the custody of the deceased step-father at the direction of the non-minor legal heir.
 

Cheyenne hughes

Junior Member
Thank you very much for the info. I will talk to my daughter and see what she wants to do. Right now all she can do is cry, and wonder why they are doing this too her, and her Dad.
 

xylene

Senior Member
Thank you very much for the info. I will talk to my daughter and see what she wants to do. Right now all she can do is cry, and wonder why they are doing this too her, and her Dad.
Doing what?

Not leaving the disposal of human remains to a minor?

Did the deceased have a will that specified the disposition of his remains?
 

Cheyenne hughes

Junior Member
1. I highly doubt a funeral home is going to release human remains to the exclusive control of a minor, under any circumstances.

2. It would seem that the cremains are already in the custody of the deceased step-father at the direction of the non-minor legal heir.
We didnt expect that, as her mother and being of leagal age, my daughter aponted me as her represenative, so therefor I would recieve the remains and then give them to my daughter his ONLY decendant.

Mindy is not an heir, she is the next of kin, she is not even the executor of his estate. The remains are still at the funeral home and have not been picked up. There was a verbal agreement between Mindy and my daughter that the remains would be picked up together and shared between Jacks family and his daughter. They went behind my daughters back, and changed it, instead of descusing it like adults. It seem as though you have about as much compation as they do for a daughter who has lost her father at 46yrs of age.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Cheyenne hughes

Junior Member
Doing what?

Not leaving the disposal of human remains to a minor?

Did the deceased have a will that specified the disposition of his remains?
No he told his daughter he wanted to be with his mom, and that is what my daughter wants to do, Put him with his mom.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Get an attorney. The attorney will stop the funeral home from doing anything hasty. The question of age is a red-herring - her rights are not lessened, but she will need a representative, as you alluded to.
 

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