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can father file for full custody and move under these circumstances?

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durango118

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CO

I am asking for a close relative. Here's the best abbreviated version I can give.
A very short relationship in the state of CO produced a child 5 1/2 years ago. Before pregnancy was realized both parents had gone their separate way. Mom moved down south, dad moved west.
Child was born in southern state and once dad was notified of birth, went to southern state to meet and offer support and also obtain a DNA test (he is 99.9% child's father) Dad flies mom and child to western state several times to meet and visit extended family but only for the child's benefit, there is no relationship at all between the parents. Within the year, mom moves back to CO to be closer to her mom for much needed support. Dad makes several visits to CO to visit child. Dad is paying court ordered child support. As child approaches age of two, Dad moves to CO to be closer and form relationship with child. Dad spends every weekend with child. The relationship is a very loving and trusting one.

Mom has had several incidents with the law and Dad has tried in vain to give her benefit of the doubt. She has had several less than desirable relationships that has produced two additional children. The father of the additional children is now serving 5-8 for domestic abuse and assault with a deadly weapon. Mom was arrested for domestic violence as well and also child endangerment (two separate incidents) Dad has just found out that mom left the 3 children (all under the age of 5) home alone. It was a neighbor that called police. Mom lied to CPS and stated all 3 children were of the same father (the one that is now serving time) Dad was not given the opportunity take his child from this situation and at the time of the mom's arrest, all 3 children were subsequently sent to mom's mother to care for them. Mom is booked and later released. She was given probation for offense. Some months later she misses an appointment with her probation officer and then stops going altogether. Court issues warrant for her arrest. At this point she did have a job and seemed to be holding her own. Once the law caught up to her she is remanded to a "work release" program. Mom moves children to her mom's at this time. Grandmother brings children to mom's workplace during lunch so they can visit. After only a few months, mom loses all work release privileges and is now strictly incarcerated. Dad has no idea about her release and the mom's mom will not give him any straight answers. Child continues to live with grandmother, along with other siblings and grandmother's children. Child is becoming increasingly upset when it's time to return to the grandmother's. Has indicated he wants to live with dad.

Father feels it is in the child's best interest to file for full custody but that would mean moving child to western state so he can also have the support of his extended family. Since there were never (as far as he knows) any custody orders filed, does he need to file something in the state of CO? Is there some unwritten law that says mother's get custody unless otherwise noted?

Thank you in advance for any advice you can offer.
 


Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Please have one of the legally involved parties log on to ask their own questions. Alternatively, please have the legally involved party consult with an attorney. Thank you and good day.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Really... no need to be so rude about it.
Thank you very much.

Polite: Please have one of the legally involved parties log on to ask their own questions. Alternatively, please have the legally involved party consult with an attorney. Thank you and good day.
 
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LdiJ

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CO

I am asking for a close relative. Here's the best abbreviated version I can give.
A very short relationship in the state of CO produced a child 5 1/2 years ago. Before pregnancy was realized both parents had gone their separate way. Mom moved down south, dad moved west.
Child was born in southern state and once dad was notified of birth, went to southern state to meet and offer support and also obtain a DNA test (he is 99.9% child's father) Dad flies mom and child to western state several times to meet and visit extended family but only for the child's benefit, there is no relationship at all between the parents. Within the year, mom moves back to CO to be closer to her mom for much needed support. Dad makes several visits to CO to visit child. Dad is paying court ordered child support. As child approaches age of two, Dad moves to CO to be closer and form relationship with child. Dad spends every weekend with child. The relationship is a very loving and trusting one.

Mom has had several incidents with the law and Dad has tried in vain to give her benefit of the doubt. She has had several less than desirable relationships that has produced two additional children. The father of the additional children is now serving 5-8 for domestic abuse and assault with a deadly weapon. Mom was arrested for domestic violence as well and also child endangerment (two separate incidents) Dad has just found out that mom left the 3 children (all under the age of 5) home alone. It was a neighbor that called police. Mom lied to CPS and stated all 3 children were of the same father (the one that is now serving time) Dad was not given the opportunity take his child from this situation and at the time of the mom's arrest, all 3 children were subsequently sent to mom's mother to care for them. Mom is booked and later released. She was given probation for offense. Some months later she misses an appointment with her probation officer and then stops going altogether. Court issues warrant for her arrest. At this point she did have a job and seemed to be holding her own. Once the law caught up to her she is remanded to a "work release" program. Mom moves children to her mom's at this time. Grandmother brings children to mom's workplace during lunch so they can visit. After only a few months, mom loses all work release privileges and is now strictly incarcerated. Dad has no idea about her release and the mom's mom will not give him any straight answers. Child continues to live with grandmother, along with other siblings and grandmother's children. Child is becoming increasingly upset when it's time to return to the grandmother's. Has indicated he wants to live with dad.

Father feels it is in the child's best interest to file for full custody but that would mean moving child to western state so he can also have the support of his extended family. Since there were never (as far as he knows) any custody orders filed, does he need to file something in the state of CO? Is there some unwritten law that says mother's get custody unless otherwise noted?

Thank you in advance for any advice you can offer.
Ok, this is a complicated situation because its not just custody between mom and dad, the state is involved and apparently grandma has placement via a CPS action.

CPS has a general mandate to reunite children and the parents they take them from, therefore there is a fairly rigid procedure that has to be followed in order for a non-custodial parent in another state to get placement. CPS tends to want to keep the children within their jurisdiction. The added glitch is that he would be separated from his siblings to be placed with dad.

I would strongly recommend that dad get an attorney in the state where CPS is involved (I assume that is CO?). He has a better than decent chance of getting placement of his child but it will work a whole lot better if he has an attorney.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Ok, this is a complicated situation because its not just custody between mom and dad, the state is involved and apparently grandma has placement via a CPS action.

CPS has a general mandate to reunite children and the parents they take them from, therefore there is a fairly rigid procedure that has to be followed in order for a non-custodial parent in another state to get placement. CPS tends to want to keep the children within their jurisdiction. The added glitch is that he would be separated from his siblings to be placed with dad.

I would strongly recommend that dad get an attorney in the state where CPS is involved (I assume that is CO?). He has a better than decent chance of getting placement of his child but it will work a whole lot better if he has an attorney.
Parents don't get PLACEMENT. They get custody. And dad may qualify for appointed counsel IF CPS is involved. That whole constitutional rights thing. However it sounds like CPS is NOT involved and the children were returned to mom so he needs to file in the court of proper jurisdiction to establish paternity judicially and request custody of his child. Added glitch? No. MOM is the glitch. MOM is the one who has screwed up. Mom is the individual who deserves to lose custody to a proper fit father. Mom is the one WHO LIED to the court And I can continue in how you are most likely wrong. Why? Because it is very likely mom just placed the children with grandmother. Dad needs to research it. Dad needs to contact the juvenile court in mom's county and find out if his child was involved in a CPS case or if mom granted her mother custody. If not then dad needs to file in the county where mom is for CUSTODY of his child and to show why it is in the child's best interests that he get custody.
 
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durango118

Junior Member
"And I can continue in how you are most likely wrong. Why? Because it is very likely mom just placed the children with grandmother"

I'm not sure I follow you about being most likely wrong. The children were sent to the grandmother's house on the night in question under the direction of CPS. I have no idea what happened once the mom was released after being arrested for child endangerment. Obviously she was able to pick up where she left off as far as her children were concerned.

The mom, who is now incarcerated, more than likely did just hand the children over to her mother, when her work release was to begin. Again, not sure how this happens when there is a father present, involved in the child's life and paying support. Original post stated that father had moved back to CO as child approached 2 years of age. He still resides there. Thank you for the advice Ohiogal. You have at least offered a place to start and that is with CPS. Again, thanks.
 
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Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Stop meddling in others' affairs. This is none of your business. Not your circus, not your monkeys. You have no dog in this fight.
If your "close relative" is so inclined, please have your "close relative" log on to ask questions of their own. We don't deal with third parties because you just don't know everything that's going on.


Understand?


"And I can continue in how you are most likely wrong. Why? Because it is very likely mom just placed the children with grandmother"

I'm not sure I follow you about being most likely wrong. The children were sent to the grandmother's house on the night in question under the direction of CPS. I have no idea what happened once the mom was released after being arrested for child endangerment. Obviously she was able to pick up where she left off as far as her children were concerned.

The mom, who is now incarcerated, more than likely did just hand the children over to her mother, when her work release was to begin. Again, not sure how this happens when there is a father present, involved in the child's life and paying support. Original post stated that father had moved back to CO as child approached 2 years of age. He still resides there. Thank you for the advice Ohiogal. You have at least offered a place to start and that is with CPS. Again, thanks.


And for Zignor "Not quite as polite: Butt out, it's none of your business.

Rude: Well...no need for me to go there."

Are you having a bit of irregularity today, because you certainly act like it. People like you give lawyers a bad name. Take a chill pill my friend.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
"And I can continue in how you are most likely wrong. Why? Because it is very likely mom just placed the children with grandmother"

I'm not sure I follow you about being most likely wrong. The children were sent to the grandmother's house on the night in question under the direction of CPS. I have no idea what happened once the mom was released after being arrested for child endangerment. Obviously she was able to pick up where she left off as far as her children were concerned.

The mom, who is now incarcerated, more than likely did just hand the children over to her mother, when her work release was to begin. Again, not sure how this happens when there is a father present, involved in the child's life and paying support. Original post stated that father had moved back to CO as child approached 2 years of age. He still resides there. Thank you for the advice Ohiogal. You have at least offered a place to start and that is with CPS. Again, thanks.

I answered you only because LD was leading you astray. But this is NOT your situation. And I am the ONLY lawyer who answered you. You need to take a chill pill. You also need to read the terms of service. You also need to realize that I didn't say start with CPS. START with the court of proper jurisdiction -- and ONLY dad can do that. NOT YOU.
 
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durango118

Junior Member
I logged on this morning, being 100% honest, (which is what I thought I read in the rules) not pretending to be the dad or the mom, with no deceit what-so-ever, hoping to get any direction that I could, to give to the person that is dealing with this situation. That person asked me via phone last night "can you please ask on that legal forum that you said you had seen online" . I promised I would.

My sincere apologies if this wasn't allowed.

Thank you.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
I logged on this morning, being 100% honest, (which is what I thought I read in the rules) not pretending to be the dad or the mom, with no deceit what-so-ever, hoping to get any direction that I could, to give to the person that is dealing with this situation. That person asked me via phone last night "can you please ask on that legal forum that you said you had seen online" . I promised I would.

My sincere apologies if this wasn't allowed.

Thank you.
Can we assume that you have now told this person that it would be best for them to log on here themselves because they have information that you simply don't, so you really can't get any get advice to give them?
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Since CO seems to be the state where the child was conceived and perhaps born, but where neither parent nor the chil live (for over 5 years), the state w/jurisdiction is likely the state where Mom lives/CPS is involved. With her child. And OP has no dog in this fight.

ETA: I see Mom moved back to CO. OP still has no dog in the fight.
 
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