Ex wife deploying

[blue_lagoon]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Louisiana
My ex-wife is scheduled to deploy in January 2018. She wants to leave our 4 year old son with her mother for the 400 day tour that she will be deployed. I would like for our son to live with me during the time she will be away. The court order states that we both have "joint legal care, custody and control of our son with her being the domiciliary parent subject to periods of physical custody awarded to me" (which is every other weekend and half of Thanksgiving & Christmas breaks). I should also note that the court order does not mention anything about deployment. My ex-wife says that even while she is deployed the court order will stand and she can leave him with her mother and I continue to get him every other weekend and that I would have to take her back to court in order for him to live with me while she is deployed.

 

[not2cleverRed]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Louisiana
My ex-wife is scheduled to deploy in January 2018. She wants to leave our 4 year old son with her mother for the 400 day tour that she will be deployed. I would like for our son to live with me during the time she will be away. The court order states that we both have "joint legal care, custody and control of our son with her being the domiciliary parent subject to periods of physical custody awarded to me" (which is every other weekend and half of Thanksgiving & Christmas breaks). I should also note that the court order does not mention anything about deployment. My ex-wife says that even while she is deployed the court order will stand and she can leave him with her mother and I continue to get him every other weekend and that I would have to take her back to court in order for him to live with me while she is deployed.

The court order will stand until someone goes to court and successfully convinces a judge that it should change.

 

[LdiJ]

The court order will stand until someone goes to court and successfully convinces a judge that it should change.

And...that is likely something that you should do blue_lagoon. You would need to jump on that immediately because you may not have enough time to get in front of a judge before she deploys.

 

[blue_lagoon]

Update to previous thread

My ex-wife is now deployed (in Texas training for about 30 days, then will ship out mid February) Our son is staying with her mom while I continue to get him as stated in the court order...The problem is I have not gotten my son when I was supposed to get him for the past two weekend visits. Ex wife and her mother was provided with a calendar for 2018 with my scheduled weekends (I get him every other weekend) and scheduled holiday breaks. Ex wife left for Texas on Jan 17th. I was supposed to get my son on Jan 12th (they didn't show up at designated meeting place) nor Jan 26th. I'm beginning to think that I will not be able to see my son for the whole year that my ex wife is gone. What can I do?

 

[Just Blue]

My ex-wife is now deployed (in Texas training for about 30 days, then will ship out mid February) Our son is staying with her mom while I continue to get him as stated in the court order...The problem is I have not gotten my son when I was posed to get him for the past two weekend visits. Ex wife and her mother was provided with a calendar for 2018 with my scheduled weekends (I get him every other weekend) and scheduled holiday breaks. Ex wife left for Texas on Jan 17th. I was posed to get my son on Jan 12th (they didn't show up at designated meeting place) nor Jan 26th. I'm beginning to think that I will not be able to see my son for the whole year that my ex wife is gone. What can I do?

Just go and pick up your child from Granny.

 

[HRZ]

ANd go get an attorney s input and get her served ASAP if a modification to order is necessary ..in a logical sense it hard to be a domicialary parent if one has moved away or is not there ..but often special rules apply to service men and women .... to me its critical to get her served consistent with state law before she is " gone."

 

[blue_lagoon]

Just go and pick up your child from Granny.

"Granny" is very ignorant simply put... very confrontational. Even though ex wife is domicillary parent, our son has always lived with granny. He goes to school where she lives (about 30 minutes from ex wife and I live) I want to do what's best for my son. I'm afraid if I just "go get him" and disrupt his life so to speak it will look bad to a judge. Also if I meet the police at her address, will they make her give my son to me or say "its a civil matter".

 

[Zigner]

Just go and pick up your child from Granny.

That was my thought as well...but then I read the law and found that it could be considered custodial interference if the OP were to do that:

https://law.justia.com/codes/louisiana/2011/rs/title14/rs14-45-1/

§45.1. Interference with the custody of a child

A. Interference with the custody of a child is the intentional taking, enticing, or decoying away of a minor child by a parent not having a right of custody, with intent to detain or conceal such child from a parent having a right of custody pursuant to a court order or from a person entrusted with the care of the child by a parent having custody pursuant to a court order.

It shall be an affirmative defense that the offender reasonably believed his actions were necessary to protect the welfare of the child.

B. Whoever commits the crime of interference with the custody of a child shall be fined not more than five hundred dollars or be imprisoned for not more than six months, or both. Costs of returning a child to the jurisdiction of the court shall be assessed against any defendant convicted of a violation of this Section, as court costs as provided by the Louisiana Code of Criminal Procedure.

(emphasis added)

 

[Just Blue]

"Granny" is very ignorant simply put... very confrontational. Even though ex wife is domicillary parent, our son has always lived with granny. He goes to school where she lives (about 30 minutes from ex wife and I live) I want to do what's best for my son. I'm afraid if I just "go get him" and disrupt his life so to speak it will look bad to a judge. Also if I meet the police at her address, will they make her give my son to me or say "its a civil matter".

So...Do you want to continue with your child being raised by this "very ignorant" person?

 

[blue_lagoon]

ANd go get an attorney s input and get her served ASAP if a modification to order is necessary ..in a logical sense it hard to be a domicialary parent if one has moved away or is not there ..but often special rules apply to service men and women .... to me its critical to get her served consistent with state law before she is " gone."

Money is an issue as far as attorney goes which is why I haven't took her back to court and of course she has a lawyer. She texted me saying to meet with her attorney to discuss custody and military deployment issues two days before she left. I didn't meet with her attorney because we already have a court order and I felt like they wanted me to sign something stating I was in agreement with her mother keeping our son. I don't know what her attorney told her but now they are not abiding by the court order. We have been divorced for almost 2 years and have been abiding by the court order with no problems until now. I believe she thinks I will keep my son once I get him on my weekend.

 

[Just Blue]

That was my thought as well...but then I read the law and found that it could be considered custodial interference if the OP were to do that:

https://law.justia.com/codes/louisiana/2011/rs/title14/rs14-45-1/

§45.1. Interference with the custody of a child

A. Interference with the custody of a child is the intentional taking, enticing, or decoying away of a minor child by a parent not having a right of custody, with intent to detain or conceal such child from a parent having a right of custody pursuant to a court order or from a person entrusted with the care of the child by a parent having custody pursuant to a court order.

It shall be an affirmative defense that the offender reasonably believed his actions were necessary to protect the welfare of the child.

B. Whoever commits the crime of interference with the custody of a child shall be fined not more than five hundred dollars or be imprisoned for not more than six months, or both. Costs of returning a child to the jurisdiction of the court shall be assessed against any defendant convicted of a violation of this Section, as court costs as provided by the Louisiana Code of Criminal Procedure.

(emphasis added)

Oy. LA is weird.

 

[blue_lagoon]

So...Do you want to continue with your child being raised by this "very ignorant" person?

No I do not, but I also don't want to just take my child out of school because he's in ECE I wont be able to get him in school where I live due to limited spots available that are already filled for this year. I should add that my son has a developmental delay in speech and has speech therapy at preschool.

 

[Zigner]

Oy. LA is weird.

The OP can ask the police to accompany him next time Grandma is supposed to turn over the child for visitation...

I'm curious WHY grandma won't turn over the child now, all of a sudden.

 

[Just Blue]

No I do not, but I also don't want to just take my child out of school because he's in ECE I wont be able to get him in school where I live due to limited spots available that are already filled for this year. I should add that my son has a developmental delay in speech and has speech therapy at preschool.

So....Try having a "sit down" and assure Granny that you just want to have the court ordered visitation and do not want to disrupt his/her life.

 

[LdiJ]

For your next weekend, if they do not show up at the meeting place you need to go all of the way to her mother's house, with your court orders in hand, and if grandma won't turn your son over to you, then you need to at least try calling the police to see if they will assist. They may, they may not, but you need to try.

You also need to file for emergency, temporary custody based on the fact that mom has deployed leaving your son with someone else.