Mother is moving child away

[1GoodDad]

First, right now we both live in Georgia.

I have a 18 month old child who is in the custody of her mother. I believe I am consider a "non-custodial" parent.

Short story:

We lived together "even though I was paying child support", she said, "in case i got stupid". We recently split up and are living seperate. Now we were never married. I see my daughter whenever I want pretty much, but keep her every other weekend while she is working.

I recently found out that she is inquiring and really trying to move to California. This does not sit well with me because that is so far away.

Do I have anything I can do? If I were to go to court and get awarded at least on paper that we share half custody, would I still be able to do anything?

I mean I don't see a judge telling someone they can't live somewhere. However, my heart is hurt over this and I would never do this if the roles were reversed. I believe the family should be together, I tried and tried, but she wants to live the single life apparently. I just gave up trying.

Any help is really appreciated.

 

[Just Blue]

Are there any court orders? Is the cs voluntary or court ordered?

 

[1GoodDad]

I guess I should of put that. I have a court order to provide child support, its a consent to agree to pay CS. She filed shortly after the child was born. In which it went directly in to a joint account. At least until we split up and now she has it in her account. I have not problems with the CS. However, the move is really bothering me.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

What is in the court order concerning parenting time?

 

[CourtClerk]

First, right now we both live in Georgia.

I have a 18 month old child who is in the custody of her mother. I believe I am consider a "non-custodial" parent.

Yes, you would be

Short story:

We lived together "even though I was paying child support", she said, "in case i got stupid".

Uh huh

We recently split up and are living seperate. Now we were never married. I see my daughter whenever I want pretty much, but keep her every other weekend while she is working.

Ok... good. So you do have an established relationship with the child.

I recently found out that she is inquiring and really trying to move to California. This does not sit well with me because that is so far away.

And it really shouldn't

Do I have anything I can do? If I were to go to court and get awarded at least on paper that we share half custody, would I still be able to do anything?

I would suggest that you immediately go down to the courthouse to establish custody and visitation. Yes, you can ask for, and should receive joint custody (legal and physical). You can have mom remain primary custodian.

I mean I don't see a judge telling someone they can't live somewhere.

No, they won't say.. "you can't live there," but they can say things like:
You can go, but the child stays... (unlikely under normal circumstances) or
you and the child go, but you are going to have to pay for transportation costs for baby to visit dad on xxx schedule

However, my heart is hurt over this and I would never do this if the roles were reversed. I believe the family should be together, I tried and tried, but she wants to live the single life apparently. I just gave up trying.

Any help is really appreciated.

As I stated before, you need a custody and visitation order and when that order is established, make sure that it absolutely speaks on move away orders and terms (in detail). That way you don't have to go back later because something is vague.

Good luck

 

[Just Blue]

I guess I should of put that. I have a court order to provide child support, its a consent to agree to pay CS. She filed shortly after the child was born. In which it went directly in to a joint account. At least until we split up and now she has it in her account. I have not problems with the CS. However, the move is really bothering me.

Okay...I just wanted to make sure you are legally the dad. File a motion to prevent your child from being moved out of the county. She is free to move where ever she wants but she is not free to take the child.

Also you need to file for custody/visitation rights...as of now you have none. Do it on Monday morning ...in your motion you should include that the child be kept in county/state until the custody hearing.

What are the reasons she is moving??

Do not tell her in advance of what you are doing...she will take the child and you won't be able to serve her.

 

[1GoodDad]

What is in the court order concerning parenting time?

nothing about visitation

 

[1GoodDad]

As I stated before, you need a custody and visitation order and when that order is established, make sure that it absolutely speaks on move away orders and terms (in detail). That way you don't have to go back later because something is vague.

Good luck

thanks for the help.

 

[1GoodDad]

Okay...I just wanted to make sure you are legally the dad. File a motion to prevent your child from being moved out of the county. She is free to move where ever she wants but she is not free to take the child.

Also you need to file for custody/visitation rights...as of now you have none. Do it on Monday morning ...in your motion you should include that the child be kept in county/state until the custody hearing.

What are the reasons she is moving??

Do not tell her in advance of what you are doing...she will take the child and you won't be able to serve her.

Yeah, so I do not need to retain a lawyer at this time? I just go to courthouse? What dept would I go to handle this? Sorry for my ignorance.

 

[CourtClerk]

Yeah, so I do not need to retain a lawyer at this time? I just go to courthouse? What dept would I go to handle this? Sorry for my ignorance.

Yes, you go to the courthouse and look for the family law department. The clerks in the office are prohibited by law from giving you advice or even telling you what forms to file, however, if you tell them you need a custody and visitation packet, that should be sufficient enough for them to give you what you need.

Do you need an attorney? A lot of people go pro se (represent themselves), however, I would suggest that if you have the means, then please hire an attorney. It will save you the headaches that this will probably bring. I work in a courthouse EVERYDAY and represented myself in my custody issues and it brought ME countless headaches... and I maneuver myself through the courts WELL.

If you don't have the means for an attorney, then I would suggest you look into legal aid. However, if she lawyers up... you borrow the money from somewhere.

 

[1GoodDad]

Yeah she says she has a lawyer, but a while back I mentioned I wanted something "visitation" on paperwork. This was before I knew about the move or even if she was considering it, she said, no you don't have to do that you can see her whenever you want. So I didn't bother.

Now, I'm kicking myself in the butt for not taking care of this.

I have the means so I will start inquiring, but I will be sure to get the paperwork Monday.

Also, I have the CS order in an adjoining county. We both lived in prior, but now we both live in another county. Do do this through the county I live in now, or the one where the CS order was made?

 

[Just Blue]

Yeah, so I do not need to retain a lawyer at this time? I just go to courthouse? What dept would I go to handle this? Sorry for my ignorance.

If you can AT ALL afford an attorney ...get one! Family Court for your county would handle this...or as they call it here Probate Court...

 

[CourtClerk]

Yeah she says she has a lawyer, but a while back I mentioned I wanted something "visitation" on paperwork. This was before I knew about the move or even if she was considering it, she said, no you don't have to do that you can see her whenever you want. So I didn't bother.

Now, I'm kicking myself in the butt for not taking care of this.

I have the means so I will start inquiring, but I will be sure to get the paperwork Monday.

Also, I have the CS order in an adjoining county. We both lived in prior, but now we both live in another county. Do do this through the county I live in now, or the one where the CS order was made?

Don't worry about kicking yourself in the butt... everyone does some not so smart things -- and really, this probably wouldn't have been an issue until she started talking about moving.

If you're going to get an attorney, then don't go get the paperwork. That's what the attorney is for, let them do it. They'll be better at it than you would be anyway... They'll definately know what you need to file (FL is not my specialty, so I'm not even going to BEGIN to tell you what you need). Besides, they probably have relationships with the court staff that will save them the wait in the lines...lol

Again, if you're going to get an attorney, they will hash out jurisdictional issues, however, if support was stipulated to and ordered by CSE, then you can probably file in the county in which you live now, since they have no bearing on custody and visitation. Especially since both of you no longer live in that county anyway... that previous county would be an inconvenient forum anyway.

 

[1GoodDad]

Thanks for all the help. I will keep updates. I will contact a family law lawyer tomorrow.

 

[Mn_gurl37]

Tip: Be sure to do research on the attourney you want to hire, just because you pay them to represent you doesn't mean they will have your best interest at heart.