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Police Wife found out Husbands Girlfriend filed Domestic Abuse

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Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
I'm saying she ruined my life.
She. Did. Not. Ruin. Your. Life.

First of all, your life is not going to be ruined by this. You will (hopefully) move on and get this piece of excrement out of your life.

Second, it's YOUR HUSBAND that did this; she was just the tool he used to do it. In fact, and quite honestly, your prior acceptance of his dalliances speaks volumes about your own culpability in the situation you now find yourself in.
 


Just Blue

Senior Member
The woman is stating she does not want to press charges. She just wants him to be punished administratively because she says she does not want to ruin his life.

I'm saying she ruined my life. She did know he was married but he didn't tell her at first. But once she knew she still had a relationship.

Can I not sue her?
Depends. Did this happen in the U.S.? If so what state?
 

PayrollHRGuy

Senior Member
The woman is stating she does not want to press charges. She just wants him to be punished administratively because she says she does not want to ruin his life.

I'm saying she ruined my life.
No your husband did. She wasn't part of your vows, your husband was.
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
Nope. She did not. I think it's time for OP to get a job. And STD tests. Many, many STD tests.
OP likely lives in some 3rd world country and can't get the testing easily. :(

BTW Stealth...please P.M. me...I wanted to talk to you about my daughters soccer match.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
OP likely lives in some 3rd world country and can't get the testing easily. :(

BTW Stealth...please P.M. me...I wanted to talk to you about my daughters soccer match.
Uh oh.... She didn't body check someone, did she? You know how I feel about aggressive play. ;)
 

cbg

I'm a Northern Girl
This is for the OP.

Look, we get that you're scared. We get that you want her to be the one at fault because your husband is the breadwinner and if he had to take responsibility for all this, then he loses his job and you don't have any money. We understand that you want him to be blameless because if she's the one at fault, your life goes on without any new difficulties to overcome while your expletive of a husband continues to bring home the bacon. We get all that.

The fact remains that legally, she is not the one at fault here. Legally, your husband is the one in the wrong. Yes, it would have been better if she hadn't had an affair with a married man. But by your own accounts, she didn't know he was married at the time. HE DID. He is the one who broke his marriage vows. He knew he was married right from day one and he still went ahead and had sex with her. He is the one who broke police policy. She didn't make any promises to you. She isn't responsible for following police policy. She didn't know, initially, that he was married. That's all on your husband. No matter how much you want it to be her fault, it wasn't. It was his. And even if you live in one of the states Red mentioned, your case against her is weak at best. If you live in any other state, your case against her is non-existent.

The one you have legal recourse against is your husband. It's called divorce.
 

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