happynwad1
Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NJ
My wife and I have decided to go our separate ways. She has simply decided she wants out. I did not think she would want our 2 children but it turns out she filed for custody this past summer behind my back. We had to make a decision because I had told her that I no longer wanted her going to see her boyfriend and then coming to my bed to sleep. I did not in any way give her an ultimatum. I did not ask her to leave. I simply requested that she sleep on the couch. She refused, filed for custody and moved out. We were both unhappy in the marriage but were living together out of convenience. We were encouraged to try and settle the matter ourselves rather than take it to court. Despite misgivings and alot of heartbreak I found myself agreeing to allow my wife take our 2 children to her new boyfriend's home and they are now living in his house. I have full visitation. No restrictions. We are trying to continue a friendship for the sake of the children. We never fought, she just lost interest. I have come to find she is now pregnant with this other man's baby. The only upside to this is now I can get my divorce on grounds of infidelity. I am worried about my children. No, she won't hurt them. She will abuse them in other ways. She will either neglect them or yell at them. She was on bedrest with both previous pregnancies so she will no longer have any income to speak of. She did not file for child support although I do currently give her money for child care and groceries. During previous pregnancies she was moody, depressed (especially after birth), etc.. I worry for their mental well being. They have little stability. This man she is living with can barely support himself. I don't get how that is a good place for my children to be in. The only reason I agreed to this situation is because the lawyers that would give me a few minutes of their time for nothing indicated I would be wasting my time because I could not prove that she is unfit. She had a job, she had a place to live despite the fact that I hardly want another man raising my kids. It doesn't count that I know in my heart she's a selfish woman. I want these kids so badly and lawyers are so crazy expensive. The lawyers I did speak with said in most cases the mother wins and that it was not worth pursuing especially since I have limited funds. Isn't there anything I can do? I want my children with me. I don't want them taken away from her completely, I just don't want my wife to be my daughter's primary female influence. She may have passed the court's mental evaluation but I lived with this woman for more than 10 yrs. She's mentally unstable. I wish I could prove it...What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
My wife and I have decided to go our separate ways. She has simply decided she wants out. I did not think she would want our 2 children but it turns out she filed for custody this past summer behind my back. We had to make a decision because I had told her that I no longer wanted her going to see her boyfriend and then coming to my bed to sleep. I did not in any way give her an ultimatum. I did not ask her to leave. I simply requested that she sleep on the couch. She refused, filed for custody and moved out. We were both unhappy in the marriage but were living together out of convenience. We were encouraged to try and settle the matter ourselves rather than take it to court. Despite misgivings and alot of heartbreak I found myself agreeing to allow my wife take our 2 children to her new boyfriend's home and they are now living in his house. I have full visitation. No restrictions. We are trying to continue a friendship for the sake of the children. We never fought, she just lost interest. I have come to find she is now pregnant with this other man's baby. The only upside to this is now I can get my divorce on grounds of infidelity. I am worried about my children. No, she won't hurt them. She will abuse them in other ways. She will either neglect them or yell at them. She was on bedrest with both previous pregnancies so she will no longer have any income to speak of. She did not file for child support although I do currently give her money for child care and groceries. During previous pregnancies she was moody, depressed (especially after birth), etc.. I worry for their mental well being. They have little stability. This man she is living with can barely support himself. I don't get how that is a good place for my children to be in. The only reason I agreed to this situation is because the lawyers that would give me a few minutes of their time for nothing indicated I would be wasting my time because I could not prove that she is unfit. She had a job, she had a place to live despite the fact that I hardly want another man raising my kids. It doesn't count that I know in my heart she's a selfish woman. I want these kids so badly and lawyers are so crazy expensive. The lawyers I did speak with said in most cases the mother wins and that it was not worth pursuing especially since I have limited funds. Isn't there anything I can do? I want my children with me. I don't want them taken away from her completely, I just don't want my wife to be my daughter's primary female influence. She may have passed the court's mental evaluation but I lived with this woman for more than 10 yrs. She's mentally unstable. I wish I could prove it...What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?