military wife going thru divorce

[la_brown09]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? GA
I am currently married to a Marine, stationed in NC. We are going through a divorce , but have not signed papers yet. I was told by my husbands co that he would be required to send me 1/2 of the BHA(?) until the divorce was final. Is this true?

 

[DRTDEVL]

You just got the easy answer from his command without even trying.

Since you have a line of communication with his CO, it will be easy for you to report to him if your husband does not comply with the commander's order of 1/2 BAH per month.

Now, be reasonable with this information... Don't call the CO first thing in the morning on the 1st of the month if the money is not there. Depending on the method of payment, I'd give him until the 5th of the month to have the funds in your account.

 

[Just Blue]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? GA
I am currently married to a Marine, stationed in NC. We are going through a divorce , but have not signed papers yet. I was told by my husbands co that he would be required to send me 1/2 of the BHA(?) until the divorce was final. Is this true?

Unbelievable. You are pregnant by your boyfriend and expect your husband to support you? Wow.

 

[la_brown09]

Thank you.

 

[la_brown09]

and yes, i most certaianly do..we agreed to an open marriage, regardless of how people feel about that, it is still a marriage, meaning i am still entitled to half.. i do not feel bad at all for making him send me half of the money that he wouldnt even be seeing if he didnt marry me.. especially after hes pocketed around 7k and of which , ive seen none.
Maybe i sound like a complete b*tch, but none of you have met my husband.. i asked for nothhing , not one penny for months until he wouldnt give me a divorce..

 

[Just Blue]

and yes, i most certaianly do..we agreed to an open marriage, regardless of how people feel about that, it is still a marriage, meaning i am still entitled to half.. i do not feel bad at all for making him send me half of the money that he wouldnt even be seeing if he didnt marry me.. especially after hes pocketed around 7k and of which , ive seen none.
Maybe i sound like a complete b*tch, but none of you have met my husband.. i asked for nothhing , not one penny for months until he wouldnt give me a divorce..

Is this "open marriage" compliant with your "Christian" belief system that you were extolling to another member?

 

[la_brown09]

well, like everyone else, i am human. I do make mistakes, and yes, i have done things that God wouldnt approve of.. however, I am trying to make things right , and i believe thats more important at this point.

 

[Just Blue]

well, like everyone else, i am human. I do make mistakes, and yes, i have done things that God wouldnt approve of.. however, I am trying to make things right , and i believe thats more important at this point.

Ahh...And you think it "right" to suck funds from the impoverished American Military that you don't morally deserve? Did you do the "right" thing and warn your current BF that you have "liberal" views on being faithful, so that he can do the right thing and have a DNA test done once the baby arrives?

 

[la_brown09]

Well, so you know, the military awards the money to ALL married couples. I am no exception.. so by saying that , my husband will be getting the money either way until our divorce is finalized..that isnt up to me. They also pay for your health care,though i dont have it, would i be wrong for taking advantage of that too??
And, as immoral as you must think i am, i am no liar. The bf knows a dna test would be highly recommended by anyone. Ive encouraged it.. and left that for him to decided when the time comes. I have nothing to hide from him, or my husband for that matter. We were always very open about who we were sleeping with, its not as if the husband had the wool pulled over his eyes.

 

[dad43]

well well...i BET you didn't tell your husband's co you're pregnant did you? b/c otherwise, you aren't entitled to the paper his LES is printed on...ya know why? b/c the military is SUPPOSED to stick to the whole Bible version of marriage, not an open marriage...THEREFORE, if your husbands command knew you were pregnant by someone else, not only would they be encouraging him to get that divorce, they'd be getting him to do a waiver through dfas(proving infidelity, which you've admitted to, and that waiver grants him a relief of having to give you money of any kind), meaning he ain't gotta give you ANYTHING!

and i wouldn't either...and YES you would be wrong for taking part in his medical NOW. did you know, that if your husband wanted to get particularly nasty, he could request a dna test, and after proving that's not his kid, that tricare can sue you for your prenatal care? yep, i found that out myself, and was able to get my exwife released from tricare(well, at least from recieving routine prenatal care) especially when i could prove(without dna) the child could not be mine, as she concieved while i was in the middle of the atlantic...and if your husband is a "good" marine, he'd ask for his bah to be stopped NOW, and send that waiver to dfas accompanying that letter to stop bah...BUT just to let you know, a single marine, e-4 and above, can recieve single bah, as the marines/navy are doing their best to get NCO's out of the barracks...and YOU would not be entitled to his SINGLE bah...

wether you are "immoral" or not, you are 1 of those wives my wife and her friends call a part of the "Housing Mafia"...a group of women, married to men, having OTHER men's children, preying on tricare, and then BITCHING to a CO that her husband "left and won't pay up and now i'm stuck in a free house with free utilities, and i have no money "...i'm disgusted...

oh hey, if you keep bringing up "open marriage" it translates to the unit as "CONTRACT MARRIAGE" which then constitutes bah FRAUD, tricare FRAUD, a few things...and YOU can be responsible for that debt too

 

[la_brown09]

im not enrolled with Tricare( have never been), i do not live with him, and his co is aware of our "open marriage".. and, my husband has kept 95% of any money awarded..he lives off base with friends, etc. As far as infidelity, he is dating a girl i know, so i dont think he would try to use that against me.
but he doesnt seem to be working too hard on divorcing me? Ive asked his co to do whatever he can to speed along the process, but still, nothing.. we speak mayyybee twice a month on a good month..(me asking.. "Where are the papers?!)
not sure what i can do to fix all of this.

 

[dad43]

file away honey...as long as your pregnant, no one's going to divorce you(court-wise)...you don't need him to get divorced....it's called "default judgement"...meaning you file, you serve, he doesn't sign/appear w/in certain amount of time...you are divorced by default...well, idk about georgia, and if they've adopted the "no fault" divorce or not...

 

[la_brown09]

they do have the "no fault" .. i may just have to do that.
thank you.

 

[Isis1]

they do have the "no fault" .. i may just have to do that.
thank you.

given it's the military, you might want to double check on that. i think there is something protecting husband from anything being ordered if he is on military obligations.

 

[dad43]

that's only if they aren't on a deployment. then its the SSRA. but, if he is on deployment, then no OP you can't go for a divorce either...and if he does deploy, all divorce proceedings can be stopped until he returns