VirginiaMom
Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia (Loudon Co)
Hi, seeking your professional wisdom, please.
In a nutshell: I lost custody of my 4 year old son (due largely to the fact that I was very pregnant out of wedlock with another man's child at time of hearing), gained it back a year & a half later when son was 5 because CP chose to move 600 miles away and son had been doing horribly in Kindergarten and was better as soon as judge ordered that I could have him in the afternoons instead of being in after-school program (3 months after he started this improvement, then CP decided to move). Our son has been doing progressively better in the 4 years since and is now in 4th grade. I remarried (I know -- but a very positive influence for son and daughter) and we have moved from Eastern VA to NoVA, which means we are now 2 1/2 hours closer to NCP and I am stay-home mom. Was working f/t prior to move, which meant both 9 yr old and 6 yr old (who is not NCP's) were in after-school care. Now I am able to put them on the bus, and get them off the bus. Father sees 9 yr old for scheduled times (almost all out of school, including all Thanksgivings, all Spring Breaks, 1/2 Christmas, and 8 weeks in summer) but doesn't make additional trips to see him, though he is allowed to.
So, I am considering a part-time job after first of year which would require $300 / mo daycare costs which would up NCP's child support significantly (from $700 to $900). The daycare is high; we are in a small town (yes, there are a few in NoVA!) with no YMCA or equivalent, and the after-school is $300 regardless of how many days a week you use them. But as far as usage, I would only need the care maybe 4 - 8x a month - mostly I'd work just during the school hours.
My husband and I DO need the money my working p/t would bring - things are tight. But NCP doesn't want his support increased and is giving me grief (I gave him a head's up about this possibility).
My questions:
- Can they impute my past full-time income (I know a judge CAN, but would one realistically or would he/she see that me home is better than f/t afterschool care??)?
- Am I best off going through VA Child Support rather than the court system? (we did an increase previously on our own, through the courts, but he won't agree to this now, I'm sure)
- Does his employer have to tell me his current salary? I am trying to NOT have to pay my lawyer (who wouldn't come up this far anyway, but may at least write a few letters) and have asked NCP 4 times for his current pay, but he refuses to give it (I used to work for the same company so KNOW he gets quarterly bonuses and annual increases, though he tells me he's not) -- for the past 4 years, he has just given me a W-2 which is last year's salary, not this year's, which means I won't know till April what he made in 2009, and that is definitely going to be less than 2010. But that's what our order states - that we share W2 info by April 15 -- which is why I wonder if I should just turn it over to VA Division of Child Support and be done with it.
Thanks for any help and advice. I know I've screwed up in many areas, but want to do what is best for all of us. I really respect your opinions and time.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Hi, seeking your professional wisdom, please.
In a nutshell: I lost custody of my 4 year old son (due largely to the fact that I was very pregnant out of wedlock with another man's child at time of hearing), gained it back a year & a half later when son was 5 because CP chose to move 600 miles away and son had been doing horribly in Kindergarten and was better as soon as judge ordered that I could have him in the afternoons instead of being in after-school program (3 months after he started this improvement, then CP decided to move). Our son has been doing progressively better in the 4 years since and is now in 4th grade. I remarried (I know -- but a very positive influence for son and daughter) and we have moved from Eastern VA to NoVA, which means we are now 2 1/2 hours closer to NCP and I am stay-home mom. Was working f/t prior to move, which meant both 9 yr old and 6 yr old (who is not NCP's) were in after-school care. Now I am able to put them on the bus, and get them off the bus. Father sees 9 yr old for scheduled times (almost all out of school, including all Thanksgivings, all Spring Breaks, 1/2 Christmas, and 8 weeks in summer) but doesn't make additional trips to see him, though he is allowed to.
So, I am considering a part-time job after first of year which would require $300 / mo daycare costs which would up NCP's child support significantly (from $700 to $900). The daycare is high; we are in a small town (yes, there are a few in NoVA!) with no YMCA or equivalent, and the after-school is $300 regardless of how many days a week you use them. But as far as usage, I would only need the care maybe 4 - 8x a month - mostly I'd work just during the school hours.
My husband and I DO need the money my working p/t would bring - things are tight. But NCP doesn't want his support increased and is giving me grief (I gave him a head's up about this possibility).
My questions:
- Can they impute my past full-time income (I know a judge CAN, but would one realistically or would he/she see that me home is better than f/t afterschool care??)?
- Am I best off going through VA Child Support rather than the court system? (we did an increase previously on our own, through the courts, but he won't agree to this now, I'm sure)
- Does his employer have to tell me his current salary? I am trying to NOT have to pay my lawyer (who wouldn't come up this far anyway, but may at least write a few letters) and have asked NCP 4 times for his current pay, but he refuses to give it (I used to work for the same company so KNOW he gets quarterly bonuses and annual increases, though he tells me he's not) -- for the past 4 years, he has just given me a W-2 which is last year's salary, not this year's, which means I won't know till April what he made in 2009, and that is definitely going to be less than 2010. But that's what our order states - that we share W2 info by April 15 -- which is why I wonder if I should just turn it over to VA Division of Child Support and be done with it.
Thanks for any help and advice. I know I've screwed up in many areas, but want to do what is best for all of us. I really respect your opinions and time.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?