what are the chances?

[Dg82w4]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?Washington
My ex--wife who has custody of my oldest son was recently directed by a court order to provide the cost of plane tickets for my son's Christmas visit with me. Instead she waited until the day before he was to fly over to see me and filed a motion for reconsideration, and the court date was scheduled for two weeks after my son's Christmas visit would be over with. My ex had already argued the fact with the judge in court several times and the judge told her no and that she would provide the cost. After the last year of what my ex has put me and my son through in regards to visits, and then me having to pay over $1000 for a plane ticket because my ex refused to allow my son to come over for an agreed summer visit, not to mention other issues that are too great to explain here. I feel the judgement was fair. I am now filing an order of contempt to the fact that my ex-wife is trying to circumvent the courts decisions and play games with the court (there are issues of her refusing visits for my son for the past year, not to mention a what I would feel to be a frustration of visitation which forced me to pay so much for the summer visit ) I am also considering filing for a change of custody and wondering what the chances may be of actually succeeding.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[ecmst12]

How would it be in the CHILD'S best interests to be uprooted from his home just because you and mom are fighting about money?

 

[Ohiogal]

How would it be in the CHILD'S best interests to be uprooted from his home just because you and mom are fighting about money?

Quite frankly it happens because the best interests of the child are considered to be a relationship with both parents -- with which mom is interfering. When that happens, courts try to rectify the situation by changing custody. So if dad is a fit parent, it is possible that he could become the custodial parent due to mom's actions.

 

[LdiJ]

Quite frankly it happens because the best interests of the child are considered to be a relationship with both parents -- with which mom is interfering. When that happens, courts try to rectify the situation by changing custody. So if dad is a fit parent, it is possible that he could become the custodial parent due to mom's actions.

Yes it definitely is possible, but its not guaranteed. Lots of different factors come into play. I am only saying this so that the OP doesn't get the impression that its a slam dunk.

 

[CJane]

What do the existing court orders say re: visitation?

Where do mom and child live?

Where do you live?

Who moved?

 

[Ohiogal]

Yes it definitely is possible, but its not guaranteed. Lots of different factors come into play. I am only saying this so that the OP doesn't get the impression that its a slam dunk.

Oh it most definitely is NOT a slam dunk.

 

[Dg82w4]

in respnose to CJane

the subject of the court oder is a long story, but the short version is the legal existing court that was filed when we divorced in 2002 states that I am to receive two days of visit every week plus one week for christmas and one week for spring and I believe two weeks for summer. But in 2006 My ex moved to Florida and served me with a notice of relocation, proposed parenting plan, and a order of child support. Well after a big arguement in late 2008 between my ex and myself she refused to go buy the agreement that was made when she moved and not send my son up to see me for Christmas. Shortly after that I contacted child support, not entirely sure what I was expecting to accomplish, I then was informed that the paperwork done in 2006 was not legal or binding. So then all the fun statred, So currently my ex and my son live in texas. I live in Washington state. I have been trying to establish a new parenting plan to acomendate the new circumstances. But the process has been slow going. The last court date we had 12/9/2009 the judge decided on the new child support amount and that my ex would provide for the my son's christmas visit. After that everything would be then split equally in cost. I am not trying to make the choice to ask for custandy sound that it has anything to do with money. there is so much more to this story that is long and drug out I would rather not get into it all. But in the end if the judge feels it is still in the best interest of my son to stay with his mother I will notargue it but do all that I can to stay in my son's life

 

[LdiJ]

the subject of the court oder is a long story, but the short version is the legal existing court that was filed when we divorced in 2002 states that I am to receive two days of visit every week plus one week for christmas and one week for spring and I believe two weeks for summer. But in 2006 My ex moved to Florida and served me with a notice of relocation, proposed parenting plan, and a order of child support. Well after a big arguement in late 2008 between my ex and myself she refused to go buy the agreement that was made when she moved and not send my son up to see me for Christmas. Shortly after that I contacted child support, not entirely sure what I was expecting to accomplish, I then was informed that the paperwork done in 2006 was not legal or binding. So then all the fun statred, So currently my ex and my son live in texas. I live in Washington state. I have been trying to establish a new parenting plan to acomendate the new circumstances. But the process has been slow going. The last court date we had 12/9/2009 the judge decided on the new child support amount and that my ex would provide for the my son's christmas visit. After that everything would be then split equally in cost. I am not trying to make the choice to ask for custandy sound that it has anything to do with money. there is so much more to this story that is long and drug out I would rather not get into it all. But in the end if the judge feels it is still in the best interest of my son to stay with his mother I will notargue it but do all that I can to stay in my son's life

Is there any chance that she flat out didn't have the ability to purchase the ticket? That's no legal excuse of course, but a lot of people are dealing with very strained financial situations right now.

 

[CJane]

Is there any chance that she flat out didn't have the ability to purchase the ticket? That's no legal excuse of course, but a lot of people are dealing with very strained financial situations right now.

Also, it's not contempt if it's not a willful act...

It doesn't appear to me that there is a workable or enforceable order in place, and there hasn't been for quite some time.

Dad, what has your actual time with kiddo in the past 2 years consisted of?

 

[Dg82w4]

the mother is married to a man who makes a very well living, this was the reason for the out of state move so she wouldn't have to work and could stay home with her children.He makes some wheres in the ball park of 50-60 thousand a year if not more. I bring in an earth shattering 26 thousand a year, and covered the full cost of the plane ticket of $970 plus $100 for uncompanied minor fee.

I do not wish to argue all of this and would agree if I could, just to see my son. I have spent the last seven years doing what she wanted and jumping hoops so I could spend time with my son, but last October when she called wanting more money and told me that basically if I didn't give it to her then she wouldn't send my son to see me I put my foot down and decided enough. Shortly after christmas of 2008 she had even called and asked if I had had time to think about her agreement.
As for visits in the last two years, I was given 33 days this last summer and eight weeks last summer from June til August. Beofore the move I saw my every every weekend.

The mother argued the fact that she wouldn't be able to afford the plane tickets becuase of the short notice, the judge still felt and was adimit that she would find a way. Now one day before the scheduled visit she served me paperwork of having the trial reconsidered, and trying to have the child support also reconsidered, and trying to have me cover 60% of all expenses. The child support was done according to the Wash. state guidelines and the amount was figured from that.

As for weather this was dileberate, I guarantee it was dileberate. I beleive a part of the reason the judge ordered her to cover the cost was not only the amount I had to cover but the games she has been playing with the court in regards to my seeing my son.

 

[ecmst12]

The judge ordered her to pay because she is the one who moved. You can sue for reimbursement for the plane tickets.

 

[CJane]

The judge ordered her to pay because she is the one who moved. You can sue for reimbursement for the plane tickets.

Though you should wait until there is a determination on her motion to reconsider.

You might even be successful on a contempt motion, but not based on her husband making better money than you. HE is irrelevant to this story.

You can also expect a portion of her defense to be that she has been covering all out of pocket medical costs with no reimbursement from you. (Accurate or not)

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

the mother is married to a man who makes a very well living, this was the reason for the out of state move so she wouldn't have to work and could stay home with her children.He makes some wheres in the ball park of 50-60 thousand a year if not more. I bring in an earth shattering 26 thousand a year, and covered the full cost of the plane ticket of $970 plus $100 for uncompanied minor fee.

I do not wish to argue all of this and would agree if I could, just to see my son. I have spent the last seven years doing what she wanted and jumping hoops so I could spend time with my son, but last October when she called wanting more money and told me that basically if I didn't give it to her then she wouldn't send my son to see me I put my foot down and decided enough. Shortly after christmas of 2008 she had even called and asked if I had had time to think about her agreement.
As for visits in the last two years, I was given 33 days this last summer and eight weeks last summer from June til August. Beofore the move I saw my every every weekend.

The mother argued the fact that she wouldn't be able to afford the plane tickets becuase of the short notice, the judge still felt and was adimit that she would find a way. Now one day before the scheduled visit she served me paperwork of having the trial reconsidered, and trying to have the child support also reconsidered, and trying to have me cover 60% of all expenses. The child support was done according to the Wash. state guidelines and the amount was figured from that.

As for weather this was dileberate, I guarantee it was dileberate. I beleive a part of the reason the judge ordered her to cover the cost was not only the amount I had to cover but the games she has been playing with the court in regards to my seeing my son.

what new hubby makes is irrelevant in this proceedings. Sorry. Your ex should be imputed an income based upon what she could be making. But hubby's income doesn't compute into this.

 

[gr8rn]

Besides that, 50-60k is not "a very well living".

 

[ecmst12]

Not for a family of 3, no way.