How old before the courts listen to the child in a custody case?

[concerned1977]

How old does a child need to be to testify in a custody case?

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? WV

my children's half sister is currently living with her great grandparents. she went to live with her biological dad in maryland when her mom died a couple of years ago and just recently we found out that the step mom was beating her. she had bruises on her back that she showed to a school councelor (apparently this wasn't the first time it happened, but she was too scared to tell anyone). when social services went over to the house they threatened to take her away and at that point the biological dad gave her up to the great grandparents granting them temporary full custody (we are not sure why, but we suspect that the step mom didn't want to loose any of her biological children because of this incident). the great grandparents at this point were already sharing custody of her (visitation on weekends) due to a prior agreement with the dad and have now enrolled her in school in west virginia. he was given visitation rights and now everytime she has to go over there she cries and pleads not to send her. at this point sometimes he picks her up for his visitation and other times he doesn't let anyone know what's going on and just doesn't show up. there is currently a court date set to work out (or to put into writing) the custody issue.

at this point the girl is 9 years old. do you think the judge would listen to her if she states that she doesn't want to go back there or for worst case scenario could the great grandparents ask for and require that the biological dad have supervised visits?

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? WV

my children's half sister is currently living with her great grandparents. she went to live with her biological dad in maryland when her mom died a couple of years ago and just recently we found out that the step mom was beating her. she had bruises on her back that she showed to a school councelor (apparently this wasn't the first time it happened, but she was too scared to tell anyone). when social services went over to the house they threatened to take her away and at that point the biological dad gave her up to the great grandparents granting them temporary full custody (we are not sure why, but we suspect that the step mom didn't want to loose any of her biological children because of this incident). the great grandparents at this point were already sharing custody of her (visitation on weekends) due to a prior agreement with the dad and have now enrolled her in school in west virginia. he was given visitation rights and now everytime she has to go over there she cries and pleads not to send her. at this point sometimes he picks her up for his visitation and other times he doesn't let anyone know what's going on and just doesn't show up. there is currently a court date set to work out (or to put into writing) the custody issue.

at this point the girl is 9 years old. do you think the judge would listen to her if she states that she doesn't want to go back there or for worst case scenario could the great grandparents ask for and require that the biological dad have supervised visits?

At this point dad is voluntarily giving custody of the child to the great grandparents. Since it obviously isn't in the best interest of the child to be in dad's primary custody at this point I think it would be extremely dangerous to "rock the boat" by doing anything that might cause dad to change his mind.

 

[concerned1977]

my concern is that you can see the fear in her eyes when it's time to go over there. and i understand that children can get very emotional and most times things aren't as bad as they seem, but she had huge bruises on her back and apparently it wasn't the first time (she just never told anyone before). everyone's fear (everone in the family) is that she'll get hit again (or worse). if anything can be done to avoid her going over there (or at least getting supervised visits with the dad) would the great grandparents have to wait until it possibly happens again. would the courts not take into account the childs request and testimony that she if fearful of going over there?

 

[Proserpina]

my concern is that you can see the fear in her eyes when it's time to go over there. and i understand that children can get very emotional and most times things aren't as bad as they seem, but she had huge bruises on her back and apparently it wasn't the first time (she just never told anyone before). everyone's fear (everone in the family) is that she'll get hit again (or worse). if anything can be done to avoid her going over there (or at least getting supervised visits with the dad) would the great grandparents have to wait until it possibly happens again. would the courts not take into account the childs request and testimony that she if fearful of going over there?

At 9 years old it's highly unlikely.

 

[concerned1977]

thanks for the opinion/advice. i have one more thought/question. at this point our main concern is her well being and although she is with her very loving great grandparents - they are pretty old and may not be able to take care of her for too long (both financially and because of their age/health). we've discussed this issue with the great grandparents and we were wondering the following:

when they go to court the most likely outcome will be that the great grandparents are granted full custody and the biological dad will retain visitation rights. what would this mean in terms of the dad's custodial right? i ask because both my husband and I and the great grandparents have discussed adopting the girl (or having her come to live with us) so that she can grow up with her siblings (my husband was married to the girls mother so our kids and the other girl have the same mom). i understand that we are not blood related so the biological dad would have all the rights in this situation, but what happens if the great grandparents are granted full custody and he only gets visitation rights? do you think we should wait for the outcome of the first court case to see where we go from threre or should we try and discuss it with the dad (we are not trying to take his rights aways (nor his visitation - even though it does scare me) we just want her to grow up in a stable environment and along with her only siblings - and dad doesn't even seem to care so much since he rarely shows up for his scheduled visits).

should i post this in the "adoption" section of the forums?

 

[Proserpina]

thanks for the opinion/advice. i have one more thought/question. at this point our main concern is her well being and although she is with her very loving great grandparents - they are pretty old and may not be able to take care of her for too long (both financially and because of their age/health). we've discussed this issue with the great grandparents and we were wondering the following:

when they go to court the most likely outcome will be that the great grandparents are granted full custody and the biological dad will retain visitation rights. what would this mean in terms of the dad's custodial right? i ask because both my husband and I and the great grandparents have discussed adopting the girl (or having her come to live with us) so that she can grow up with her siblings (my husband was married to the girls mother so our kids and the other girl have the same mom). i understand that we are not blood related so the biological dad would have all the rights in this situation, but what happens if the great grandparents are granted full custody and he only gets visitation rights? do you think we should wait for the outcome of the first court case to see where we go from threre or should we try and discuss it with the dad (we are not trying to take his rights aways (nor his visitation - even though it does scare me) we just want her to grow up in a stable environment and along with her only siblings - and dad doesn't even seem to care so much since he rarely shows up for his scheduled visits).

should i post this in the "adoption" section of the forums?

Dad would retain parental rights even if Gr. Grandparents are given full custody. Because Dad will remain involved, I think it's unlikely the court will terminate his rights (which would be necessary for an adoption to proceed).

 

[concerned1977]

Ok - thanks. I wanted to get an idea of how it all legally works out before we try to discuss the situation with the biological dad.

Thanks again.

 

[frylover]

Seniors, I'm curious about something here.

If Social Services believe that stepmom was abusing this little girl why couldn't something be done to require that Dad not expose the child to her if he wishes to see her.

Also, would it be common for them to leave the other children in the home?

 

[Proserpina]

Seniors, I'm curious about something here.

If Social Services believe that stepmom was abusing this little girl why couldn't something be done to require that Dad not expose the child to her if he wishes to see her.

Also, would it be common for them to leave the other children in the home?

It depends on what exactly happened - it isn't clear what the eventual result of the investigation was.

 

[concerned1977]

Thanks for raising the issue. Apparently they were only given a warning and told that if it happens again they would take her away. It's the belief of the family that dad gave her up because stepmom didn't want to loose "her" kids (you'd think he'd leave her after she abused his daughter!).

I was surprised that they didn't require supervised visits after that, but apparently there is nothing that can be done at this point unless she get's hit again. Isn't that just tragic? My guess is that because this was the first time the abuse was reported (even though according to the girl it wasn't the first time she had been hit, she never told anyone because she was too scared).

 

[Proserpina]

Thanks for raising the issue. Apparently they were only given a warning and told that if it happens again they would take her away. It's the belief of the family that dad gave her up because stepmom didn't want to loose "her" kids (you'd think he'd leave her after she abused his daughter!). But apparently there is nothing that can be done at this point unless she get's hit again. Isn't that just tragic?

It actually sounds like the case wasn't actually proven - and social services basically kind of "threatened" stepmom to prevent her from doing something again.

It's very difficult in these cases - but yes, I think it's likely that the case wasn't proven. Thus, Stepmom keeps her kids, and there's no restriction with Dad's visitation.

 

[concerned1977]

the abuse was reported by a counselor at the school when she saw the huge bruises on the girls back and i believe that they took her to a doctor or the hospital after that. but i guess it just wasn't enough.

 

[Proserpina]

the abuse was reported by a counselor at the school when she saw the huge bruises on the girls back and i believe that they took her to a doctor or the hospital after that. but i guess it just wasn't enough.

The problem is proving that it was StepMom who did it - it sounds like there perhaps wasn't enough to actually prove that adequately.

It's still a very sad situation.

 

[dannyt]

no

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? WV

my children's half sister is currently living with her great grandparents. she went to live with her biological dad in maryland when her mom died a couple of years ago and just recently we found out that the step mom was beating her. she had bruises on her back that she showed to a school councelor (apparently this wasn't the first time it happened, but she was too scared to tell anyone). when social services went over to the house they threatened to take her away and at that point the biological dad gave her up to the great grandparents granting them temporary full custody (we are not sure why, but we suspect that the step mom didn't want to loose any of her biological children because of this incident). the great grandparents at this point were already sharing custody of her (visitation on weekends) due to a prior agreement with the dad and have now enrolled her in school in west virginia. he was given visitation rights and now everytime she has to go over there she cries and pleads not to send her. at this point sometimes he picks her up for his visitation and other times he doesn't let anyone know what's going on and just doesn't show up. there is currently a court date set to work out (or to put into writing) the custody issue.

at this point the girl is 9 years old. do you think the judge would listen to her if she states that she doesn't want to go back there or for worst case scenario could the great grandparents ask for and require that the biological dad have supervised visits?

untill she is 18, she goes when its dad's time. she doesnt get to decide. defience of a court order can cause the great grandparents problems.

 

[frylover]

untill she is 18, she goes when its dad's time. she doesnt get to decide. defience of a court order can cause the great grandparents problems.

OP did NOT ask if the grandparents could not SEND the child, or if the child could "decide" not to go....she asked would the court possibly listen to the child, which sounds as though they are looking for ways to help this child WITHIN the court system.