principle at sons middle school

[tahoemom3]

Im in California and on Monday my 7th grader came home with a swollen jaw and a knot on his head and was speaking very hoarse. He told me that he was tackled, choked, and punched repeatively by another child with whom we had bulling issues last year. I immediately called the school and left messages with the principle to call me. Tuesday morning he called and informed me that he would talk to all parties and get back with me, my son was not at school on Tuesday due to an appointment. Wednesday the two boys were put into the office to wait until the principle could speak with them. The entire school day was spent in the office. My question is if this is legal? My son was suspended for 1 day for pushing the other boy off of him. The other boy recieved 2 days.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[Antigone*]

Im in California and on Monday my 7th grader came home with a swollen jaw and a knot on his head and was speaking very hoarse. He told me that he was tackled, choked, and punched repeatively by another child with whom we had bulling issues last year. I immediately called the school and left messages with the principle to call me. Tuesday morning he called and informed me that he would talk to all parties and get back with me, my son was not at school on Tuesday due to an appointment. Wednesday the two boys were put into the office to wait until the principle could speak with them. The entire school day was spent in the office. My question is if this is legal? My son was suspended for 1 day for pushing the other boy off of him. The other boy recieved 2 days.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Why didn't you call the police the day it happened. Your child was assaulted. If I were you, I'd still call and insists that a report be taken and that charges be considered.

The suspension is automatic if he touched the other child back. However, no one has the right to assault your child in the manner you describe.

 

[Silverplum]

You're worried about whether or not the school principal's actions were LEGAL?

That's hardly a valid concern in this situation.

 

[CdwJava]

Yes, the principal can investigate the matter. And, yes, that might involve the children remaining out of class much of the day if the principal is busy.

Typically in these situations the criminal justice system is not likely to provide much relief - if any. The school has greater power over the situation than the police will have.

If this is an issue that might continue, you can always seek a restraining order against the child. It may cost about $200 to file and may not be issued given the ages and circumstances, but if there is sufficient concern it might be worth looking in to.

 

[tahoemom3]

Yes I asked if this was legal. The reason behind that question was in fact to the district NOT handling the situation of the principles treatment of my son. We reported numerous bulling problems to him and the response was always the same that he knew the child very well and that my son must have done something wrong. I have made complaints to all levels of the school in question and as for filing a police report, all we know is the childs first name. My son just wants it to stop not escalate.

 

[Antigone*]

Yes I asked if this was legal. The reason behind that question was in fact to the district NOT handling the situation of the principles treatment of my son. We reported numerous bulling problems to him and the response was always the same that he knew the child very well and that my son must have done something wrong. I have made complaints to all levels of the school in question and as for filing a police report, all we know is the childs first name. My son just wants it to stop not escalate.

File the police report. The police will go to the school. I also suggest taking pictures of the injuries. Another great resource is your local media. If you want the school to act quickly, an inquiry about bullying from channel X news help, big time.

 

[tahoemom3]

Also, my son notified me at 2pm that he was in the office but he overheard the principle tell the other mother that they both were suspended. I did not receive a call from the school until 10 minutes before dismissal. Until that point I was the one making calls to the school,superintendant, county office etc.

 

[Proserpina]

Also, my son notified me at 2pm that he was in the office but he overheard the principle tell the other mother that they both were suspended. I did not receive a call from the school until 10 minutes before dismissal. Until that point I was the one making calls to the school,superintendant, county office etc.

With you being so busy calling everyone else, is it not possible (not that it matters) that the school couldn't reach you?

 

[tahoemom3]

With you being so busy calling everyone else, is it not possible (not that it matters) that the school couldn't reach you?

I have call waiting, a secondary voicemail, cell phone with call waiting also, my email is listed on his school website and have 4 other optional contact methods.

 

[Antigone*]

I have call waiting, a secondary voicemail, cell phone with call waiting also, my email is listed on his school website and have 4 other optional contact methods.

I watched Dr. Phil the other night and he did a show on bullying. You might want to take a few minutes to go to his site. He said something about posting resources to help deal with this epidemic.

 

[Humusluvr]

Also, my son notified me at 2pm that he was in the office but he overheard the principle tell the other mother that they both were suspended. I did not receive a call from the school until 10 minutes before dismissal. Until that point I was the one making calls to the school,superintendant, county office etc.

While not illegal, it's certainly harmful that the principal isn't taking the bullying seriously. You might put that in writing, and send it to everyone involved.

"I want each and every one of you, teachers, principal, superintendent, Board of Ed, to know this is a clear case of bullying, and it won't be tolerated. If the hostile behavior towards my son is not dealt with appropriately, and my son is harmed even further than he was today, I will be retaining legal counsel, and suing the school for failure to provide a safe educational environment. You should have a zero tolerance policy against bullying. And you are fully aware of the bullying taking place. My son has bruises, and has been injured."

No educator wants to be sued, especially as public as it is becoming these days.

And seriously, if you fear for your son's physical health, get him in another school. Don't wait for something worse to happen. You can threaten, but if there is harm that is inevitable, get your kid out.

 

[Humusluvr]

This might be a nice visual for when you meet with the principal.

"A teacher in New York was teaching her class about bullying and gave them the following exercise to perform. She had the children take a piece of paper and told them to crumple it up, stamp on it and really mess it up but do not rip it. Then she had them unfold the paper, smooth it out and look at how scarred and dirty is was. She then told them to tell it they’re sorry. Now even though they said they were sorry and tried to fix the paper, she pointed out all the scars they left behind. And that those scars will never go away no matter how hard they tried to fix it. That is what happens when a child bully’s another child, they may say they’re sorry but the scars are there forever. The looks on the faces of the children in the classroom told her the message hit home."

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

Look into the school handbook. There will be a bullying policy and procedures for filing a complaint, progressively.

 

[Captain Picard]

I would look into getting the kid trained in defending himself. Laws, police, teachers. etc. cannot protect him; only he can.

 

[Proserpina]

This might be a nice visual for when you meet with the principal.

"A teacher in New York was teaching her class about bullying and gave them the following exercise to perform. She had the children take a piece of paper and told them to crumple it up, stamp on it and really mess it up but do not rip it. Then she had them unfold the paper, smooth it out and look at how scarred and dirty is was. She then told them to tell it they’re sorry. Now even though they said they were sorry and tried to fix the paper, she pointed out all the scars they left behind. And that those scars will never go away no matter how hard they tried to fix it. That is what happens when a child bully’s another child, they may say they’re sorry but the scars are there forever. The looks on the faces of the children in the classroom told her the message hit home."

I absolutely love that. Love it.

(Where is the "like" button?!)