Sick child

[KSilva_1982]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Massachusetts

 

[KSilva_1982]

I have taken several days off for my child being sick. She's sick with a fever once or twice a month lately & daycare can not take her when she has a fever.
I have asked her father a couple times to take a day off & take her instead of me because I've taken so many days off. He always insists he can't afford to. I'm afraid I might lose my job because I've taken so many days off.
Is it possible for me to ask the judge to make him share the responsibility of taking days off when she's sick or is it just part of being the custodial parent?
I had agreed in court for him to pay $40 a week less in child support because he "helps provide for her in other ways" which he was supposed to but is not. I would consider taking a day off to care for her as providing for her in other ways. I'm going to ask them to increase the support to the court guidelines when we go back since he has not provided for her in any other way besides taking her for his visitation.
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[Silverplum]

I have taken several days off for my child being sick. She's sick with a fever once or twice a month lately & daycare can not take her when she has a fever.
I have asked her father a couple times to take a day off & take her instead of me because I've taken so many days off. He always insists he can't afford to. I'm afraid I might lose my job because I've taken so many days off.
Is it possible for me to ask the judge to make him share the responsibility of taking days off when she's sick or is it just part of being the custodial parent?
I had agreed in court for him to pay $40 a week less in child support because he "helps provide for her in other ways" which he was supposed to but is not. I would consider taking a day off to care for her as providing for her in other ways. I'm going to ask them to increase the support to the court guidelines when we go back since he has not provided for her in any other way besides taking her for his visitation.
report

You are responsible for your child on your custodial time.

 

[Proserpina]

I have taken several days off for my child being sick. She's sick with a fever once or twice a month lately & daycare can not take her when she has a fever.
I have asked her father a couple times to take a day off & take her instead of me because I've taken so many days off. He always insists he can't afford to. I'm afraid I might lose my job because I've taken so many days off.
Is it possible for me to ask the judge to make him share the responsibility of taking days off when she's sick or is it just part of being the custodial parent?
I had agreed in court for him to pay $40 a week less in child support because he "helps provide for her in other ways" which he was supposed to but is not. I would consider taking a day off to care for her as providing for her in other ways. I'm going to ask them to increase the support to the court guidelines when we go back since he has not provided for her in any other way besides taking her for his visitation.
report

As SilverPlum stated, what happens on "your" time is your responsibility.

The court will not "force" Dad to take action if the child is sick.

With that in mind, if your child is THAT sick you perhaps want to focus on what exactly is going on.

 

[KSilva_1982]

I am going to request the doctor run some blood tests. I am just upset that I agreed to less child support & he would provide for her in other ways & has not. I would consider this providing in other ways. It's been 5 months that he's paid $40 a week less in child support than the court guidelines & that is a lot more money than what he would make in a day. I will be asking at our next court date to increase the support to what the guidelines are.

 

[KSilva_1982]

I think the fever may be from catching viruses from her 4 older sisters (2 mine, 2 his) & all the children at the daycare but just to be safe I will be having her pediatrician run additional tests.

 

[Ohiogal]

I am going to request the doctor run some blood tests. I am just upset that I agreed to less child support & he would provide for her in other ways & has not. I would consider this providing in other ways. It's been 5 months that he's paid $40 a week less in child support than the court guidelines & that is a lot more money than what he would make in a day. I will be asking at our next court date to increase the support to what the guidelines are.

What you consider providing in other ways is NOT necessarily what the court will consider providing in other ways.

 

[KSilva_1982]

What would providing in other ways mean to the court? Buying clothes, diapers, helping with food, even asking about her through the week? He hasn't done anything except buy her a pair of sneakers that are too big for her & a pair of baby cow girl boots (cute but not needed) I've provided food, formula, a place for her to sleep, etc at his house. It was mine & his agreement to make the child support less & the mediator said ok. We haven't seen the judge yet.

 

[single317dad]

What would providing in other ways mean to the court? Buying clothes, diapers, helping with food, even asking about her through the week? He hasn't done anything except buy her a pair of sneakers that are too big for her & a pair of baby cow girl boots (cute but not needed) I've provided food, formula, a place for her to sleep, etc at his house. It was mine & his agreement to make the child support less & the mediator said ok. We haven't seen the judge yet.

Just figure the support on state guidelines and be done with it. Your 'agreement' will be a continuing point of contention.

http://www.mass.gov/dor/child-support/guidelines.html

 

[Ohiogal]

What would providing in other ways mean to the court? Buying clothes, diapers, helping with food, even asking about her through the week? He hasn't done anything except buy her a pair of sneakers that are too big for her & a pair of baby cow girl boots (cute but not needed) I've provided food, formula, a place for her to sleep, etc at his house. It was mine & his agreement to make the child support less & the mediator said ok. We haven't seen the judge yet.

Until the judge orders it, he doesn't have to do anything. Do you even have a court order for child support? What about for visitation? How old is your child?

 

[stealth2]

I'd also suggest finding a back-up sitter for when kiddo's sick.

 

[KSilva_1982]

Yes we do have an order of support and its withdrawn from his check every week of $100 per week. The court order states "Father shall pay the sum of $100.00 per week as child support commencing Friday, May 3, 2013 and each Friday thereafter. All payments shall be made payable through DOR. The parties are aware of the guideline amount and agree the deviation is fair as he visits with the child often and contributes financially in additional ways as needed by mother/child." The child support guidelines worksheet they printed says the guideline was $140.00. We saw only the mediator, the judge was not seen but the judge did sign the temporary order on complaint/petition for custody, visitation & support. We received a paper for a second court date of October 23, 2013. It says its a pre-trial conference.
His visitation is Saturday afternoon to Sunday evening. The only other time we speak or he even asks about her is when I tell him she is sick. He does not visit her any other time of the week.
I have tried to find a back up sitter for when she is sick, unfortunately, everybody I know & trust either has kids, goes to school, or works full time. Therefore, it is impossible for me to find a sitter when she is sick unless I have somebody I don't know well babysit.

 

[TheGeekess]

I'd also suggest finding a back-up sitter for when kiddo's sick.

Or a daycare center that specializes in caring for sick children. I know they're out there. BCBS-AL has one at their offices in Birmingham that is open to the public.

 

[KSilva_1982]

I didn't realize they had any daycares for sick children that are open to the public. I will have to research & see if I can find one around here.

 

[CSO286]

I didn't realize they had any daycares for sick children that are open to the public. I will have to research & see if I can find one around here.

You should...even some hopsitals run a "sick child" care center staffed with nurses.