Hello, I am sharing my story here, I am not sure if anything can be done or if the officer can legally do that to me, but it has caused me great trauma and I would like to at least know that he was, at least legally, right in what he did. Thank you in advance for any advice given.
This incident happened in December of 2016, I reported it to PoliceAbuse.com but never heard anything back and I don’t know what to personally do about the situation, as it has taken a serious toll on my mental well being. I will try to be descriptive as possible.
I was followed to a friends house by police, (Not a drug area and I was not wanted by any law enforcement agency or anything like that, completely random as far as I know) they parked at the end of the road and waited between 30-45 minutes for me to leave. I know this because I could see their vehicle from the house I was in and finally decided to just let them pull me over. They pulled me over as soon as I left the driveway because my drivers side reverse light was out. The officers ran my license and returned to my vehicle and explained that they weren’t issuing me a ticket. They then asked to search my vehicle and I refused. The officers took offense when I refused and said they were bringing a drug dog, and that they could legally hold me for 15 minutes on the side of the road no matter what. The whole time I was waiting, they were making rude remarks saying it's going to be a lot worse and stuff like that. They also kept asking me to repeat my name and address and even made me spell it to them several times. One officer himself asked me four or five times what my address was. The dog finally arrives and the officer said he alerted, but I honestly don't think he did. They searched my car for over an hour, it was closer to two hours altogether by the time I went home. They searched me, then my truck, then back to me, then my truck and searched VERY intently, even going as far as looking through bed of my truck looking through the dirt and picking up sticks that were less than an inch long (I had been hauling brush the day before) and then made me take my hat off and searched it, and then went back to my truck again and finally found a pop can that had been made in to a pipe for marijuana and a small marijuana seed. No tickets were issued and no arrest was made. The next part is the main reason for my question here today. My complaint isn't for the search itself, but after they found the pipe one of the officers said he used to work at the prison and knows where people hide things, and used his hand to check between my buttcheeks and also around my genitals. I feel like this was very unprofessional, and I feel violated that he could literally grab me the way that he was on the side of the road. I understand searching, but this was completely uncalled for. He even made a comment about me being gay and "Getting a freebie." I cannot express the fear I felt that night. This man had my entire genitals in one hand had the other hand feeling between my buttcrack from the bottom up, all for a reverse light being out. He did it SLOW.. I am not exaggerating. He squeezed my genitals and had his hand between my buttcheeks when he made the comment about me being gay. He then apologized and said that I looked suspicious, and they let me go. I told them that it wasn’t my intention to be suspicious and said sorry, walked back to my truck and left. I was never disrespectful or rude in any way, shape, or form during the incident even after this happened.
I understand that worse things have happened at the hands of officers, and for sure at the hands of other people in general, but I honestly feel that he overstepped his authority and violated me in several ways. This incident has left me emotionally scarred ever since. I have dreams about this man and about other officers sexually assaulting me on an almost weekly basis, most of which I wake up from in panic dripping sweat. I am extremely embarassed to say this. But as a grown man I should never be waking up in the middle of the night from a dream like this, especially when I never even broke the law. I know I should talk to a therapist but I can’t afford to pay for it. I have extreme anxiety issues anytime I’m driving, and especially when I see a police officer. I’m talking to the point of being physically sick and shaking, because I am so scared of this happening again. I was in the gas station the other night and he walked in and the only people there were me, my friend, the officer in question (no longer an officer), and another man who used to be an officer here in town but isn’t any longer, as well as the cashier. He began making loud comments to his friend about how I had reported him for sexual harassment (I believe the report I submitted with PoliceAbuse.com is obviously what he was referring to, although I never received anything back from that so I never knew what had happened regarding that) and they made jokes between each other. I kept my mouth shut and didn’t respond and paid for my items and left as to not cause a scene, and he didn’t continue the behavior.
Is there anything that can be done is this situation?? And if so, what? I am afraid of the repurcussions if I pushed it farther. He is no longer employed by the city, he left a month or two after this incident and went to another small town about thirty minutes south of me, and within a month there he was in an altercation where he shot a man to death. He was proved to be within his rights, but it still had me thinking, like what if I would have been more angry with him instead of trying to politely and respectfully express my rights?
Has anyone else here ever had this happen to them? Any help at all is appreciated.. This has been over two years and my anxiety after the event has steadily gotten worse. I barely leave my house other than when absolutely necessary and most of the time when I do leave I walk, since my hometown is only about a mile long and any of the stores are only a few blocks from my house and because the officers generally don’t bother people walking as much as cars.
There is no way that something that can cause this much emotional pain this can be legal. I don’t have children of my own, but I do have several nieces and nephews and another reason behind this is because they’ve had me thinking about this man a lot lately. I am supposed to teach them to obey the police and that they’re here to help, how can I tell that to me 4 year old niece to do that when this man was allowed to grab me by my most private area, an ugly, chubby, 23 year old man on the side of the road, for nothing? And what would he be willing to do to someone else? If the PoliceAbuse.com report was submitted by them, I read on their website that the complaint would be sent to the department of justice and that the complaint would stay on his record, but I never received mail or email regarding it so again, I have no clue as to whether it was actually sent or not, and I don’t know how to check on anything like that.
Again, thanks in advance for any advice or input given. Even if he was legally allowed to do this to me, I am very interested in hearing how other people feel about this incident. I cannot discuss it with very many people in person as I usually get laughed at or at the very least not taken seriously.
I don’t mean to downplay any assault victims; I’m sorry if any of this seems that way, I do understand that people have been literally beaten and killed and in cases I’m sure even some cases full on raped by an officer, so I will acknowledge that this incident may appear like nothing next to them, but is in no way NOTHING to me. Men like him being able to do things like this to law abiding citizens is despicable and from what very little I could possibly learn from a few Google searches, I do believe that he infringed my constitual rights.
This incident happened in December of 2016, I reported it to PoliceAbuse.com but never heard anything back and I don’t know what to personally do about the situation, as it has taken a serious toll on my mental well being. I will try to be descriptive as possible.
I was followed to a friends house by police, (Not a drug area and I was not wanted by any law enforcement agency or anything like that, completely random as far as I know) they parked at the end of the road and waited between 30-45 minutes for me to leave. I know this because I could see their vehicle from the house I was in and finally decided to just let them pull me over. They pulled me over as soon as I left the driveway because my drivers side reverse light was out. The officers ran my license and returned to my vehicle and explained that they weren’t issuing me a ticket. They then asked to search my vehicle and I refused. The officers took offense when I refused and said they were bringing a drug dog, and that they could legally hold me for 15 minutes on the side of the road no matter what. The whole time I was waiting, they were making rude remarks saying it's going to be a lot worse and stuff like that. They also kept asking me to repeat my name and address and even made me spell it to them several times. One officer himself asked me four or five times what my address was. The dog finally arrives and the officer said he alerted, but I honestly don't think he did. They searched my car for over an hour, it was closer to two hours altogether by the time I went home. They searched me, then my truck, then back to me, then my truck and searched VERY intently, even going as far as looking through bed of my truck looking through the dirt and picking up sticks that were less than an inch long (I had been hauling brush the day before) and then made me take my hat off and searched it, and then went back to my truck again and finally found a pop can that had been made in to a pipe for marijuana and a small marijuana seed. No tickets were issued and no arrest was made. The next part is the main reason for my question here today. My complaint isn't for the search itself, but after they found the pipe one of the officers said he used to work at the prison and knows where people hide things, and used his hand to check between my buttcheeks and also around my genitals. I feel like this was very unprofessional, and I feel violated that he could literally grab me the way that he was on the side of the road. I understand searching, but this was completely uncalled for. He even made a comment about me being gay and "Getting a freebie." I cannot express the fear I felt that night. This man had my entire genitals in one hand had the other hand feeling between my buttcrack from the bottom up, all for a reverse light being out. He did it SLOW.. I am not exaggerating. He squeezed my genitals and had his hand between my buttcheeks when he made the comment about me being gay. He then apologized and said that I looked suspicious, and they let me go. I told them that it wasn’t my intention to be suspicious and said sorry, walked back to my truck and left. I was never disrespectful or rude in any way, shape, or form during the incident even after this happened.
I understand that worse things have happened at the hands of officers, and for sure at the hands of other people in general, but I honestly feel that he overstepped his authority and violated me in several ways. This incident has left me emotionally scarred ever since. I have dreams about this man and about other officers sexually assaulting me on an almost weekly basis, most of which I wake up from in panic dripping sweat. I am extremely embarassed to say this. But as a grown man I should never be waking up in the middle of the night from a dream like this, especially when I never even broke the law. I know I should talk to a therapist but I can’t afford to pay for it. I have extreme anxiety issues anytime I’m driving, and especially when I see a police officer. I’m talking to the point of being physically sick and shaking, because I am so scared of this happening again. I was in the gas station the other night and he walked in and the only people there were me, my friend, the officer in question (no longer an officer), and another man who used to be an officer here in town but isn’t any longer, as well as the cashier. He began making loud comments to his friend about how I had reported him for sexual harassment (I believe the report I submitted with PoliceAbuse.com is obviously what he was referring to, although I never received anything back from that so I never knew what had happened regarding that) and they made jokes between each other. I kept my mouth shut and didn’t respond and paid for my items and left as to not cause a scene, and he didn’t continue the behavior.
Is there anything that can be done is this situation?? And if so, what? I am afraid of the repurcussions if I pushed it farther. He is no longer employed by the city, he left a month or two after this incident and went to another small town about thirty minutes south of me, and within a month there he was in an altercation where he shot a man to death. He was proved to be within his rights, but it still had me thinking, like what if I would have been more angry with him instead of trying to politely and respectfully express my rights?
Has anyone else here ever had this happen to them? Any help at all is appreciated.. This has been over two years and my anxiety after the event has steadily gotten worse. I barely leave my house other than when absolutely necessary and most of the time when I do leave I walk, since my hometown is only about a mile long and any of the stores are only a few blocks from my house and because the officers generally don’t bother people walking as much as cars.
There is no way that something that can cause this much emotional pain this can be legal. I don’t have children of my own, but I do have several nieces and nephews and another reason behind this is because they’ve had me thinking about this man a lot lately. I am supposed to teach them to obey the police and that they’re here to help, how can I tell that to me 4 year old niece to do that when this man was allowed to grab me by my most private area, an ugly, chubby, 23 year old man on the side of the road, for nothing? And what would he be willing to do to someone else? If the PoliceAbuse.com report was submitted by them, I read on their website that the complaint would be sent to the department of justice and that the complaint would stay on his record, but I never received mail or email regarding it so again, I have no clue as to whether it was actually sent or not, and I don’t know how to check on anything like that.
Again, thanks in advance for any advice or input given. Even if he was legally allowed to do this to me, I am very interested in hearing how other people feel about this incident. I cannot discuss it with very many people in person as I usually get laughed at or at the very least not taken seriously.
I don’t mean to downplay any assault victims; I’m sorry if any of this seems that way, I do understand that people have been literally beaten and killed and in cases I’m sure even some cases full on raped by an officer, so I will acknowledge that this incident may appear like nothing next to them, but is in no way NOTHING to me. Men like him being able to do things like this to law abiding citizens is despicable and from what very little I could possibly learn from a few Google searches, I do believe that he infringed my constitual rights.
