Harassing and stalking

I live in California and back in September of 2005 began receiving harassing text messages stating profane things about me. Then I started receiving letters in the mail. Calling me names, making threats, and saying that my boyfriend was cheating on me. Then this person started threatening to hurt my children. That is when I began taking it seriously and I filed a police report. So now we have a whole case going, and the detective found out exactly who this person is. She got a separate cell phone account under a false name and was sending text messages and calling up to 45 times per day sometimes. This caused horrible stress on my relationship and for my family as well. My daughter had to start therapy and taking medication for depression and anxiety and I did, too. She would tell my daughter that her mother was a whore who liked to f*** two guys at the same time. And then she would tell me that I shouldn't let my youngest daughter ride her scooter all alone outside.
Now that things are all out in the open, she called my boyfriend and told him he'd better have the charges against her dropped or else he would go to jail, too. She was claiming that we were all on drugs and selling drugs out of my home! She even went as far as to come onto my property on Thanksgiving while we were gone and key my car. She scratched "old pussy" into the side of my car. Then sent me a text message telling me to look at my car when I got home. When we saw what happened, we went outside to take pictures of the car (about 10:00pm) then she sent another text message saying "I heard you were taking pictures of my artwork". She is absolutely CRAZY!!! Now this evening, we were just served with temporary restraining orders to stop harassment. She is stating that we are harassing her and causing her stress and anxiety and that she is afraid to leave her house for fear that we might attack her! Are you kidding me? This is the same girl that faked a pregnancy and watched my house, and told my daughter she was going to f*** her boyfriend and beat her up. The detectives say that they can't charge her with vandalism for my car because there are no witnesses and she says she didn't do it. She did, however, admit to harassing us, and mailing letters, and even calling and telling us we better drop the charges against her. This has absolutely ruined my life and about 6 months of my relationship. I have spent many a day in therapy discussing this with my therapist. I have had to start taking anti-anxiety medicine throughout the day, and more medicine just so I can sleep at night. And now after all that, am I going to get in trouble because she says I'm harassing her? The only reason I ever called the number she was texting from, was to see if anyone would answer the phone. I don't know what to do... I just want this nightmare to end. I can't believe this girl was obsessed with my boyfriend and that's why all of this happened. The detectives have also said that I would have to sue her in civil court for the vandalism and anything else. She's ruined 6 months of my life, harassed my minor daughter who now has to be in therapy and taking medication twice a day, not to mention she missed almost a whole month of school because she was so depressed and had such bad anxiety, my boyfriend and I are lucky to still be together and this has had a HUGE impact on our relationship, and at best she may have to do community service and pay some fines.
Can anyone please tell me what I should do?

(QUOTE)My daughter had to start therapy and taking medication for depression and anxiety and I did, too. She would tell my daughter that her mother was a whore who liked to f*** two guys at the same time. And then she would tell me that I shouldn't let my youngest daughter ride her scooter all alone outside. (QUOTE)

She was reading your text messages? I don't buy one word of your post, but someone may.

Shay-Pari'e said:

She was reading your text messages? I don't buy one word of your post, but someone may.

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No takers yet, huh?

I don't know why I ever come to this board for help. Everyone here is so rude and belittling. And to answer your question Shey Peri'e... No, my daughter wasn't reading my text messages. This stalker person was sending text messages to my daughter as well.
People come to this board with problems and they need help and advice. I have read so many "smart-ass" comments, answers and remarks that you "Senior Members" have left for people that really need help. It seems to almost defeat the purpopse of this board. Maybe they should call it "free legal ridicule".

petersnessa said:

I don't know why I ever come to this board for help. Everyone here is so rude and belittling. And to answer your question Shey Peri'e... No, my daughter wasn't reading my text messages. This stalker person was sending text messages to my daughter as well.
People come to this board with problems and they need help and advice. I have read so many "smart-ass" comments, answers and remarks that you "Senior Members" have left for people that really need help. It seems to almost defeat the purpopse of this board. Maybe they should call it "free legal ridicule".

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To tell you the truth...I couldn't get past the 3rd or 4th line...you need to edit your first post...put in some paragraphs ...break it up a bit...You will get more responses that way...

How did she get yours and your minor daughter's cell phone numbers so she could send you harrassing text messages, and why didn't you change the numbers once the harrassment started?

Block this persons messages. Block ALL text messages from your daughter phone if you have to.

Also, you may not be getting the answers you need because the question is not posted in the proper place. If this person is a stranger to you, it is not a DOMESTIC VIOLENCE problem.

Sounds more like a lovers triangle case to me . If that's true maybe you should dump the BF , as he's just sitting there watching the show enjoying it .

At any rate , if true , you are "allowing " this to all happen . Dump the BF , move , and change phone #s , and date responsibly .

I am a male who has experienced almost unbelievable harassment from my ex in the last few years, including 10,000+ phone calls, vandalism to my vehicle, etc etc.

I followed police advice, got a ro, served it. She violated it well over 200 times on top of calling my friends and parents. She finally pled guilty to violating a court order on 1/03/2006 and went right back to making her calls.

My best advice is to maintain "pressure" on the PD and the DA. Because I was a male and she a female, it was TOUGH to get them to believe that this was real harassment, or that it would'nt just "go away".

Document (log) your calls. IMPORTANT: PC 633.5 allows an individual under certain circumstances (like yours, where you are being harassed per PC 653m(a) or (b) to tape record these calls without court authorization. Not only that, the recordings, if they fit certain criteria, are ADMISSABLE as evidence. I know; they are using some of my recordings to recharge this nut.

Good luck.

There is a potential for several misdemeanor charges for annoying and harassing communications (per PC 653m), but the police will need proof that it was her that sent the messages.

It sounds as if the police already have the information. It may be that they just do not have enough to make a case in court beyond a reasonable doubt.

Talk to the officer investigating and see what he or she might need to make the case better.

- Carl