2 yr mortgage payment vs. "support"

[dd1969]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? WA

After 20 years of being married and now living in the house we purchased together 15 years ago, the housing market is way down. We now owe more than it's value. I alone can not afford the mortgage ($2400), so he stated he would pay the mortgage for 2 years, until our youngest is 18, in lieu of child and spousal support. Is this something I should agree on - he has the D papers and it will be on there.

You may be thinking...can I trust he will pay..yes, he is decent in always helping us out finacially when needed. Not a break up I wanted...he just fell out of love and feels it is wrong to stay.

I guess it is comforting knowing my 2 boys and I have a place to live (our own home)for at least 2 years.

 

[mistoffolees]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? WA

After 20 years of being married and now living in the house we purchased together 15 years ago, the housing market is way down. We now owe more than it's value. I alone can not afford the mortgage ($2400), so he stated he would pay the mortgage for 2 years, until our youngest is 18, in lieu of child and spousal support. Is this something I should agree on - he has the D papers and it will be on there.

You may be thinking...can I trust he will pay..yes, he is decent in always helping us out finacially when needed. Not a break up I wanted...he just fell out of love and feels it is wrong to stay.

I guess it is comforting knowing my 2 boys and I have a place to live (our own home)for at least 2 years.

That opens a LOT of cans of worms. Whether you do it or not is obviously a personal opinion, but consider all of the following:

- How much would he be paying in CS? You can find the calculator here:
https://fortress.wa.gov/dshs/csips/ssgen
- Who gets the benefit if the market recovers? Who pays the price if it continues to fall?
- If he is not living in the house, he can not deduct the interest payment. That may change the situation (for example, if the payment is $2400 per month, it might be better for him to pay you $2400 and YOU make the payment - although that creates risk for him
- Make sure that you know how you're handling insurance, maintenance, utilities, repairs, etc
- Would he have to pay alimony otherwise? After a 20 year marriage, it's entirely possible if your incomes are very different.
- Will it really be any better than simply selling the house, absorbing the loss and making a clean break? Moving to a new place isn't the end of the world.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? WA

After 20 years of being married and now living in the house we purchased together 15 years ago, the housing market is way down. We now owe more than it's value. I alone can not afford the mortgage ($2400), so he stated he would pay the mortgage for 2 years, until our youngest is 18, in lieu of child and spousal support. Is this something I should agree on - he has the D papers and it will be on there.

You may be thinking...can I trust he will pay..yes, he is decent in always helping us out finacially when needed. Not a break up I wanted...he just fell out of love and feels it is wrong to stay.

I guess it is comforting knowing my 2 boys and I have a place to live (our own home)for at least 2 years.

With a 20 year marriage, you might be able to get more than two years of alimony. Depending on his income, you might be entitled to more than 2400.00 in combined child support and alimony.

You really need to consult with your own attorney.

 

[dd1969]

Thank you for the helpful information! I keep seeing pension questions for those whose spouces have pensions. Am I legally entitled to receive this?? Is it fair that as spouces we ask for this...it is afterall "his" pension.

Regarding alimony.....Our monetary difference is that he makes in one week that I make in two.

 

[mistoffolees]

Thank you for the helpful information! I keep seeing pension questions for those whose spouces have pensions. Am I legally entitled to receive this?? Is it fair that as spouces we ask for this...it is afterall "his" pension.

You will each be entitled to 1/2 of the marital portion of any pension, 401K, etc. The actual calculations can get complicated, though.

Regarding alimony.....Our monetary difference is that he makes in one week that I make in two.

I agree with Ld's advice. You should have an initial consultation with an attorney and present all your information (salaries, values of pensions, etc). Many attorneys will give you an initial consultation for free.