3 month marriage

[varulv]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Newyork

I have been married only for 3 months(dec-11), unbelivable parental involvment from wifes side, wife left with parents one day when i came back from work,went to get her back from her home,father calls police, she files a restraining order against me, police report states no fights and both parties calm, no charges levied,want to want find out the best way out, do i ask for divorce first or wait for her, parents very litigant , father has lawyer connections and threatened me with charges of "emotional, mental and physical(no signs of it on her-no police report of such either) torture" any help/advise on how to cut my lossesvout of this, she has not yet filed for divorce , am wondering if the best bet is for me to do so first or wiat for her ?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? I have also been served to go to court for restarining orde not sure what to do?

 

[ecmst12]

Her parents are not a part of the process.

Do you want to be divorced? If so, file. If not, hope that she comes to her senses. Either way, I would suggest some counseling for you.

 

[Bali Hai]

Her parents are not a part of the process.

Do you want to be divorced? If so, file. If not, hope that she comes to her senses. Either way, I would suggest some counseling for you.

And you give this advice based on what?

 

[ecmst12]

OP seems to be having a hard time dealing with the emotional shock of the situation, and doesn't seem to know what he wants to do. Plus I would recommend it to anyone going through a divorce.

 

[Bali Hai]

OP seems to be having a hard time dealing with the emotional shock of the situation, and doesn't seem to know what he wants to do. Plus I would recommend it to anyone going through a divorce.

It's bad enough with lawyers and judges messing with your head during a divorce. Now you want a shrink to scramble his brain even further?

My advice: Toughen up, get through it, and move on.

 

[varulv]

be calm toughen up move on

 

[ecmst12]

A counselor is not a psychiatrist, and therapy never makes things worse. It can ONLY help.

 

[davidmcbeth3]

There goes "till death do we part" huh?

Well, you lasted longer than most Hollywood marriages.

I don't think her mother & father like you very much.

 

[Ohiogal]

A counselor is not a psychiatrist, and therapy never makes things worse. It can ONLY help.

Unless Richard Gardner was your therapist.

 

[Bali Hai]

A counselor is not a psychiatrist, and therapy never makes things worse. It can ONLY help.

Help what, make OP "feel" better? He might better spend the money on a fishing trip.

 

[ecmst12]

Help him come to terms with what has happened so he can maybe avoid similar situations in the future. And insurance usually covers it. How are you being helpful again? Oh right, you're not.

 

[Willlyjo]

Help what, make OP "feel" better? He might better spend the money on a fishing trip.

I agree with you! The OP doesn't need counselling! Counselling isn't the answer to everything!

OP, you might want to look into the possibility of getting an annullment since you've only been married for a couple months. Unless you are feeling physical effects manifested by severe emotional distress, I wouldn't waste money or insurance coverage on counselling--I strongly believe it wouldn't be necessary.

 

[LdiJ]

I agree with you! The OP doesn't need counselling! Counselling isn't the answer to everything!

OP, you might want to look into the possibility of getting an annullment since you've only been married for a couple months. Unless you are feeling physical effects manifested by severe emotional distress, I wouldn't waste money or insurance coverage on counselling--I strongly believe it wouldn't be necessary.

What are his grounds for an annulment?

 

[ecmst12]

Wife leaves him after 3 months and files a restraining order on him and he is wondering whether he should file for divorce. Nope, he isn't confused about anything.

 

[st-kitts]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Newyork

I have been married only for 3 months(dec-11), unbelivable parental involvment from wifes side, wife left with parents one day when i came back from work,went to get her back from her home,father calls police,

OP, I concur that counseling and a bit of introspection might be worthwhile.

The way you stated the sequence of events is interesting...

Upon coming home from work you learn your wife is at her parents and you "went to get her back"... She (your wife) isn't property, but you are describing her as such...

I think that your future relationships may be more successful with a bit of counseling and perhaps some reflection on control issues.