All are right about increase and do not file to increase time..you already have increase approved....file motion asking to modify visitation reflecting or to include court ordered visistation increase. Go in already presenting position you have the extra time, just need to define when because u 2 can't agree. Have a visitation schedule ready, what you want, to give judge...easier to just agree to your reasonable schedule than for judge to make one feels fair to both..do work for judge...shows you were willing to do same with ex. Letter ex a copy of revised schedule(certified always) stating your due increase is valid by order & this your suggest for....give a deadline of reply & request reply by cert. mail. Shows co op even more for you. Do this several times if time avail..2nd letter..I sent u one requesting etc...have not heard, if don't by such & such will assume you are agreeing...that usually gets some response. If none still, take all to lawyer, pay the 100 to have lawyer send letter stating by no reply ex is agreeing to terms and include new order with new terms...perhaps will just sign,be done.
Agree..keep other issues out, get increase first..once u get, hard for courts to take but if u never get & get in that other battle..u could end up with no extra. DO NOT PLAY WITH CPS...they will take your child from both...they.like judges see this crap a lot but you never know if your one case worker has unresolved issues,is biased, whatever. Once notified (CPS), they become somewhat liable for child's being and take no chances....really strict in some states. My ex also tried using Dx visits and accusations toward me, though not to point of CPS. Think hospitals must report any claim, suspicion...even if just the word of one person..again liability. I visited the peds office, spoke w/ each doctor and followed with letters....also I sent one on the offense to Social Services..just stating ex had made false allegations,cc all the doctor letters to SS, and just stated wanted to make them aware if they got report from ex...this was a power battle. Made big difference, showed doctors ex's letters to me claiming Dx said this,that,my neglect caused...they never said things in that way..said any parent might overlook psoriasis as a heat rash,cold sore & not uncommon. Just for safety, anytime child gets bump, take a picture, write down scenerio..a witness never hurts. Helps if it all comes up 2,3 weeks down road..not just your memory..plus shows u threatened enougth by ex, felt need to protect,document. False child neglect/abuse accusations serious.
Child..remember is a 5 yr old right? You can't go in courtroom and only evidence is my 5 yr old said. They do make up stuff, starting about that age, play parents against each other. Some of your examples definately a stretch for a 5 yr to just make up but....not against law for child to walk in on adults having sex...and unless you can prove it, have picture of him in floorboard,witness to such...it is really just hearsay...although it will cause judge to give wonder.
I am wondering if you could not pursue, possibly in motion of visit change without bringing up other stuff...the fact of grown woman sharing a room with 5 yr old child...then add the man. Most courts...or my state has provision in orders that require NCP to supply child with own room, even if it's parent's room & they take couch. This especially as child ages (they need own space) and when parent is of different gender...what?...will he be sharing ex's room when he is 9,12....do not feel court looks to good on that & especially if ex also has partner. Think that may be best avenue to fight her on, can have it as part of your order, child must have own room at each home. May be able to use this to win greater battle...if she can't provide,turn over custody if you can. You know u can also have order mandate no overnight guests of opposite sex..remember works both ways but was best for me..eliminates problems all the way around & that is easy one to prove if rule broken. Bargain with these things.
Don't know why but, my son about 5 1/2 started telling outrageous stories about ex's house..left him alone,forgot him at sitters..I really started worrying but, as I investigated..found much exagerated...caused much strife between me and ex, we are already bitter. Then when we (ex & I) calmed down, his tales (son's) started fading...about right at 7 yrs. Kids know parents don't get along, will try to test the limits,boundaries. Not saying your case all false, just look deeper before you leap..get a PI, a friend or u & check it out..binoculars,cameras...I did, only way I could get truth..u know not going to believe ex...gotta do what you gotta do..and cheaper if u do it,...don't use your own car though...dead giveaway. Don't record convo w/o telling other party illegal...but u can follow,keep schedule journal,photo anything.......again as long as it is not through the back window of ex's home.lol good luck..got a job ahead of you.
PSs...include in letter to ex statement of not notifing you of hosp visit and state how you were told...CPS? You must think ahead of ex. Also counsling on your time good but if you seek & pay...you may be responsible to inform ex as ex to you with hosp. Really have to read your order, word for word....need to notify, not malign ex but make aware anyplace she may use...school,dentist,babysitters...send letter now just briefly stating there is custody issue, could be ugly,want to make aware of situation & to notify you of anything relevent...also stress you send this awareness as these are people involved/around your child and should know case they notice child change of behavior. If paid counsel out, try school counsler if have one, free, service of school so you do not have to inform ex. Should notify such anyway of issues, just ask if counsl can keep ear open, initiate casual convo with child in hall, lunchroom and feel out if any problems. Do not insult or accuse ex of anything..explain bad between u 2 but you are requesting this only out of concern for u'r child & how handling whole divorce,unfriendliness,etc and so child knows someone can go to if not mom/dad to talk. Worked for me...I came out looking great, as I am concerned for my child...ex went everywhere slandering me and looked like a bitter a_ _!
They are still hateful & bitter because much as they cry, I care, they feel they got bad end of deal and NCP is out living fun,swinging,joyful life. They remain bitter because they want to dictate other parents relation with child but only on thier terms...switch ok if good for them, if not to CP benefit no & then they get pissed because they need to switch & know they can't call NCP, NCP won't say yes, because CP never says yes. They will not give up custody for fear NCP will treat them as they have treated NCP and by god CPs do not want to pay support or be in position/subjected to all that comes with that. CPs bitter because they expect NCP to be same kind of parent as if still together...depending on breakup..bitter because child didn't keep one there,bitter at thier own contributions to split,bitter NCP doesn't feel obligated to CP for being caregiver,bitter NCP goes out while CP must be home...no matter what, fact is custody is power....power to interfere in ex's life,know ex's private affairs..income,work,bonuses,new purchases, power to hurt NCP emotionally through child,power todamage any new relation NCP may find,influence child majorly and as long as CP has child they are guarenteed the ex in life somehow. I see/have imppression that there is nothing more thrilling to a CP than to be getting support & not allowing visitation....until they (cps) fullfill thier life,selves they will never get over it or the competition with the other parent.
