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adopted by g-parents visitation by mom

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What is the name of your state? MISSOURI

Hi, my name is Ashley i'm 14 years old. I'll try to make this problem as short as possible. I have lived w/ my g-parents my whole life. My mom had me when she was 15, and was kicked out at 17 yrs old and my g-parents got temporary guardenship of me. (so they have still not to this day, adopted me) well they have lied to me my whole life saying my mom didnt want me and stuff and I have begun to talk to her lately. My g-parents are very abusive, my g-pa was sexually abusive sumwut and both are verbally and emotionally abusive to me still. They at first told me when I was 10 yrs old that they werent my parents, that the person i thought was my sister was my mom. even tho i asked for counsling they refused it, didnt want anything to "embarass the family" They also told me they had no idea who my father was, which recently ahve found was a lie. Well about 3 months ago they told me i could see my mom, since then we only went to the mall for 2 hours (all we were aloud) and went to a community pool. Since then everytime my mom has asked they ahve said no. Its not like my mom didnt want to be in my life, they would never let her. Would call the cops or whatever when she showed up. We talk daily on the phone w/o their knowing. They will just give me a guilt trip. These are not normal people.... they do everything in their power to make you unhappy. This house is harmfull to me, i'm not kidding you. They have 3 boys and a girl, all of them have which had suicidal thoughts because of them, the girl had sex at young ages to get the love she wasnt getting from home, all were involved in drugs and alcohol to get release from this. And I see it happening to me. I am sumwhat thankfull for having a house and everything for this time, but I want to see my mom and i want to meet my father, i think its only fair. I know if my mom tries to get me that they will fight it, they use me as a way to "get back at her" like "hahaha we have her you cant have her" because they tell me constantly that they hate me, how they dont know why they took me in, but they wont let me leave. Legally what can I do? Do i have to wait until i'm 18? the problem is, is that they are totally oblivious to what they are doing, saying everyone else is wrong, that our problems are caused by others, they are basically in denial. any advice you could give would help :) thanks!

Whyte Noise

Senior Member

From the way you say your grandparents are acting, it makes me wonder if they are being subsidized by the state to take care of you. Missouri has a program that pays "kinship guardians" a monthly amount in order to keep the children out of the foster care system, and in a family environment. In other words, grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. who take in grandchildren, nieces and nephews get PAID for doing it.

Ashley, copy this link into your browser, and read that page.


It's a bit in-depth, and has a lot of what I call "legal-ese" (legal terminology). But it will tell you the answers to your questions. As I don't know the circumstances surrounding why your grandparents were given guardianship to start with, I can't tell you any specific answers. The Missouri statutes provide for the termination of guardianship, but it depends on the reasons why a court deemed guardianship was needed in the first place. Read that page. If you have any problems understanding certain parts, just ask and I'll try my best to explain it to you, OK? I might not be able to get right back to you, but I will be back on the board later tonight, and I'll answer you then. And you can always E-mail me at [email protected]

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