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Adoption Laws in Virginia, please help.

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kirana4

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia

I have one son. I gave birth to him 2 years ago. My son's biological father (let's call him Ralph) has never really been in the picture. The only time that he has ever seen my son was on his first birthday September of 2007. And he did, for the most part, pay a little bit in child support (not court ordered) until I got married in December 2007. Since I got married, not only has Ralph stopped paying child support, he has had no contact with me or my son what so ever, and has changed his cell phone number so I now have no way of trying to get in contact with him. And Ralph never would give me his address (he moved to Tennessee with his new girlfriend [lives with her parents!] and refused to ever give it to me) so I can't contact him via mail either. I do still keep in touch with Ralph's family and they are of no assistance either. They do get my son gifts for holiday's and when we are in town we go visit them. but no support.
Now, as I've mentioned before, I have remarried. My husband is wonderful and my son just loves him to death. And we're in the Army and we're actually trying to go on a tour to Japan in early 2010 (if possible). My husband is more than willing to adopt my son and I want that to happen so bad. And when I deliver the news that we're possibly moving to Japan, I don't want Ralph's family to try and make drama for us. I know I could talk to Jag about this (or at least I think I could) but I figured I would at least try this first and see what advice you all have in order to help me in my situation.

So, lets review so you don't have to re-read. My son is 2. Ralph has seen him only ONCE in those 2 years (and never came around while I was pregnant). We did have a DNA test done. Ralph is NOT listed on my son's birth certificate. I remarried December 2007. Ralph has had no contact or child support sent since then. My husband wants to adopt my son before we go overseas.

Thanks for all the help!!!What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
 


Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Was the DNA test court ordered? Was paternity established by the court? Why did you never get court ordered support? You can try to file for a stepparent adoption based on abandonment but you would have to serve Ralph.
 

kirana4

Junior Member
Was the DNA test court ordered? Was paternity established by the court? Why did you never get court ordered support? You can try to file for a stepparent adoption based on abandonment but you would have to serve Ralph.
dna was not court odered.. and having Ralph served isn't an option. I have NO address or way of getting in contact with him.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
dna was not court odered.. and having Ralph served isn't an option. I have NO address or way of getting in contact with him.
Having him served is NOT an option. IT is a REQUIREMENT! You must follow proper service in order to have a step parent adoption -- in other words, you NEED an attorney.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Having him served is NOT an option. IT is a REQUIREMENT! You must follow proper service in order to have a step parent adoption -- in other words, you NEED an attorney.
There are methods for service if a parent is unable to be found...which is why you need an adoption attorney. Its not a DIY project.
 

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