Advice Needed

[CJane]

So how exactly does the court determine if she is being properly looked after on her visits?

The law guardian will determine whether the parenting choices being made are in the child's best interests. So YES, ALL of the parenting choices being made will be "considered". Whether or not they're given weight in making recommendations depends on what that consideration tells the law guardian, and how the law guardian communicates any concerns to the judge.

While it's fairly easy to say "parenting differences" - and oftentimes we see posters who are truly being petty and whiny about their ex's choices - there are some cases in which the differences really are at odds with the child's best interests. Whether or not this is actually one of those cases is up to the law guardian to determine.

 

[plshelp99]

The law guardian will determine whether the parenting choices being made are in the child's best interests. So YES, ALL of the parenting choices being made will be "considered". Whether or not they're given weight in making recommendations depends on what that consideration tells the law guardian, and how the law guardian communicates any concerns to the judge.

While it's fairly easy to say "parenting differences" - and oftentimes we see posters who are truly being petty and whiny about their ex's choices - there are some cases in which the differences really are at odds with the child's best interests. Whether or not this is actually one of those cases is up to the law guardian to determine.

Okay. Thank you, now I understand a little better.

 

[stealth2]

The law guardian will determine whether the parenting choices being made are in the child's best interests. So YES, ALL of the parenting choices being made will be "considered". Whether or not they're given weight in making recommendations depends on what that consideration tells the law guardian, and how the law guardian communicates any concerns to the judge.

While it's fairly easy to say "parenting differences" - and oftentimes we see posters who are truly being petty and whiny about their ex's choices - there are some cases in which the differences really are at odds with the child's best interests. Whether or not this is actually one of those cases is up to the law guardian to determine.

Let me expand on my "Probably not"... The LG will likely not give much weight to Mom telling her MIL told her the child said xyz. Will the LG talk to MIL? Maybe, maybe not. Ours didn't talk to our families, or neighbors, or friends. The majority seemed to be based on her meeting with each of us and the child(ren) - and yes, the child(ren) and each parent together. We also had 20+ pages of interrogatories to fill out and return.

And yes, this was in NY.

 

[plshelp99]

Let me expand on my "Probably not"... The LG will likely not give much weight to Mom telling her MIL told her the child said xyz. Will the LG talk to MIL? Maybe, maybe not. Ours didn't talk to our families, or neighbors, or friends. The majority seemed to be based on her meeting with each of us and the child(ren) - and yes, the child(ren) and each parent together. We also had 20+ pages of interrogatories to fill out and return.

And yes, this was in NY.

Should I seek to get my MIL to write a letter to the court attesting to this exchange (in addition to others)? MIL also has a friend who is a social worker who likes to poke and prod at my child. Should I ask her to write something? Again, I am not trying to nail him, but I want the court to know exactly what 'supposedly' goes on during these visits. I am also getting letters from the doctors/therapist that my child is seeing.

 

[LdiJ]

Should I seek to get my MIL to write a letter to the court attesting to this exchange (in addition to others)? MIL also has a friend who is a social worker who likes to poke and prod at my child. Should I ask her to write something? Again, I am not trying to nail him, but I want the court to know exactly what 'supposedly' goes on during these visits. I am also getting letters from the doctors/therapist that my child is seeing.

The LG might very well want to speak to the child's therapist. An independent third party like that is someone that an LG is more likely to want to speak to about the child's issues. No, you should NOT have your MIL right a letter to the court. A letter cannot be cross-examined. You would need your MIL to actually testify in court.