Finished2010
Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas
I have posted before and kinda got my butt chewed by ohiogirl. Not complaining she was right in what she said. Except the whole "we" misunderstanding.
If she is reading this thanks for the reality check, it was a lot easier for ME to not tell my son about his real dad. I didnt know what to say honestly, how to answer the inevitable question "where is he". I sat my five year old son down and told him that his real dad is another man and guess what, he said ok. He did ask where is he and I said he is at his house, he asked why dont he see me and I answered honestly. He is sick I told him. He said is my "dad" (my husband) still my dad because I love him and I said yes honey he is, he is your step dad but if you want you can still call him dad, but mommy has been silly for not telling you the truth and he said thanks mom for the "fruth"!!!! I made this public so other moms who have made the same mistake as I have can see it. I know how difficult it is to " come clean" after so many years. I understand how us as mothers try to protect our kids from the realization that sometimes dads chose not to be around. I understand now that we are hurting our kids by trying to protect them. If I had waited as many suggested I should I dont think he would have taken it so well. I do still plan to have my husband adopt my son in the future, any advice on how to make that easier on everyone is welcome. All info about dad and the situation is in the last post, he hasn't seen him since his first b-day party except for a few minutes in october when he signed consent for a passport. He does not call although he has our number. He did sign AOP at birth. He has a record for having weed and pills ( a few times) on him and several PI charges. Somebody told me his lack of involvement could be considered Extreme Paternal Disinterest. Is that information correct? I never filed for support but called the Ags office and chose the option ask a legal question about AOPs and was told that it is a legal document establishing paternity and that he could have at any time opened a case himself. I was told that my not filing for support did not in any way mean he need not pay any. Any suggestions on how we could proceed are welcome, thanks to all!!
I have posted before and kinda got my butt chewed by ohiogirl. Not complaining she was right in what she said. Except the whole "we" misunderstanding.
If she is reading this thanks for the reality check, it was a lot easier for ME to not tell my son about his real dad. I didnt know what to say honestly, how to answer the inevitable question "where is he". I sat my five year old son down and told him that his real dad is another man and guess what, he said ok. He did ask where is he and I said he is at his house, he asked why dont he see me and I answered honestly. He is sick I told him. He said is my "dad" (my husband) still my dad because I love him and I said yes honey he is, he is your step dad but if you want you can still call him dad, but mommy has been silly for not telling you the truth and he said thanks mom for the "fruth"!!!! I made this public so other moms who have made the same mistake as I have can see it. I know how difficult it is to " come clean" after so many years. I understand how us as mothers try to protect our kids from the realization that sometimes dads chose not to be around. I understand now that we are hurting our kids by trying to protect them. If I had waited as many suggested I should I dont think he would have taken it so well. I do still plan to have my husband adopt my son in the future, any advice on how to make that easier on everyone is welcome. All info about dad and the situation is in the last post, he hasn't seen him since his first b-day party except for a few minutes in october when he signed consent for a passport. He does not call although he has our number. He did sign AOP at birth. He has a record for having weed and pills ( a few times) on him and several PI charges. Somebody told me his lack of involvement could be considered Extreme Paternal Disinterest. Is that information correct? I never filed for support but called the Ags office and chose the option ask a legal question about AOPs and was told that it is a legal document establishing paternity and that he could have at any time opened a case himself. I was told that my not filing for support did not in any way mean he need not pay any. Any suggestions on how we could proceed are welcome, thanks to all!!