affair???

[chica]

A male co-worker and I were really good work friends. We would joke about work, music, whatever. He is married and I am not. He occasionally would confide in me problems he was having with his marriage. I would always tell him to talk to wife about this and communicate to her his feelings. He recently told me that he was having problems in his marriage and that his wife was going to leave him after the holidays. Anyway, we went on a business trip together and went out for a night of drinking. We were both heavily intoxicated and as we were stumbling in a bar we accidentally kissed. That was it. There were no sexual relations. Nothing. We were both shocked and hurt by this. He called his wife and told her. She was calm and decided to file for divorce instead of seperation now. She is using this accident- claiming we had an affair and put her in danger by exchanging bodily fluids and that I helped in the failure of the marriage by being his friend.

I am confused by this. There was never anything between him and I except friendship. Not a single romantic word or gesture was ever exchanged between us. I hardly remember the kiss, if that's what you could call it. Can she claim all this over an accidental kiss? Can I expect to be subpoened? What will most likely happen? Could she hire a Private Investigator and try to make something out of nothing?

 

[LegalBeagle]

A male co-worker and I were really good work friends. We would joke about work, music, whatever. He is married and I am not. He occasionally would confide in me problems he was having with his marriage. I would always tell him to talk to wife about this and communicate to her his feelings. He recently told me that he was having problems in his marriage and that his wife was going to leave him after the holidays. Anyway, we went on a business trip together and went out for a night of drinking. We were both heavily intoxicated and as we were stumbling in a bar we accidentally kissed. That was it. There were no sexual relations. Nothing. We were both shocked and hurt by this. He called his wife and told her. She was calm and decided to file for divorce instead of seperation now. She is using this accident- claiming we had an affair and put her in danger by exchanging bodily fluids and that I helped in the failure of the marriage by being his friend.

I am confused by this. There was never anything between him and I except friendship. Not a single romantic word or gesture was ever exchanged between us. I hardly remember the kiss, if that's what you could call it. Can she claim all this over an accidental kiss? Can I expect to be subpoened? What will most likely happen? Could she hire a Private Investigator and try to make something out of nothing?

She was looking for an excuse to get out of the marriage and he gave her one.... he knew he had problems and told her anyway. Sounds like they are as bad as each other. She will have a hard time proving adultery with what she has. You may be ask to give evidence, but so what, tell the truth.

Personally, I suggest you take a step back from all of this and let them fight it out... you won't of course, but it would be wise to..

 

[chica]

Should I seek counsel? She knew that he and I were work friends. Nothing was ever hidden from her about our friendship because there was nothing to hide. I am concerned about the work environment. Could this possibly get investigated and then other co-workers could get asked questions and then everyone at work would find out? It sounds like she is trying to make something out of nothing. Because there was nothing there. I would always defend his wife when he confided in me.

Would a lawyer advise to do an in-depth investigation with just this? There were tons of other reasons for the divorce. Am I stressing over nothing? What are the legal definitions of an affair and adultery? Can an accidental kiss fall under that and a platonic friendship?

 

[LegalBeagle]

Should I seek counsel? She knew that he and I were work friends. Nothing was ever hidden from her about our friendship because there was nothing to hide. I am concerned about the work environment. Could this possibly get investigated and then other co-workers could get asked questions and then everyone at work would find out? It sounds like she is trying to make something out of nothing. Because there was nothing there. I would always defend his wife when he confided in me.

Would a lawyer advise to do an in-depth investigation with just this? There were tons of other reasons for the divorce. Am I stressing over nothing? What are the legal definitions of an affair and adultery? Can an accidental kiss fall under that and a platonic friendship?

Here is the best bit of advice you will get for free. Take a step back, do not get involved, do not say anything about it to anyone.. and do nothing... until/unless you are served proper court papers. I doubt you will and I believe you have nothing to worry about.

This sounds like it will be an explosive divorce, ensure you are at least 100 yards back when it does.

 

[chica]

I have not said anything to anyone and do not plan on it. I don't know if he has or not. I have severed all contact with him and asked him to not contact me again. So, I just have to sit and wait, right?

 

[LegalBeagle]

So, I just have to sit and wait, right?

No! You are single, go out and party!! If you need help remembering how, then give me a call!


Good luck.

 

[chica]

What complicates this more is that I have a serious boyfriend. I am worried he may find out because of this divorce. I do not plan to tell him because it was nothing and it did not mean anything. But now I feel I do because what if he is approached by some Private Investigator or this lunatic lady's lawyer.

 

[LegalBeagle]

What complicates this more is that I have a serious boyfriend. I am worried he may find out because of this divorce. I do not plan to tell him because it was nothing and it did not mean anything. But now I feel I do because what if he is approached by some Private Investigator or this lunatic lady's lawyer.

Then tell him.. if he is a serious boyfriend he will understand, love you all the more for being honest and then spend the next 4 hours rubbing all your aching and worried bits... If he takes it badly and walks away then put on a party dress and call me..

Life really is that simple.. it is people who make it complicated.