ATTN: LADYBLU FROM ROCHELLE

[ROCHELLE VANCURA]

I'm approching my court date and I'm really scared I feel sick to my stomache everyday.I am petetioning the court to move away to New York ,but I fear my ex I,m on go terms with him when it comes to visitation but I know he,s not going to let me go> I a good mother and I take good csre of my son can he get custody of my son because I want to move out of state. Please I don't think I should be punished for wanting to leave state.Please help me

 

[LadyBlu]

I'm approching my court date and I'm really scared I feel sick to my stomache everyday.I am petetioning the court to move away to New York ,but I fear my ex I,m on go terms with him when it comes to visitation but I know he,s not going to let me go> I a good mother and I take good csre of my son can he get custody of my son because I want to move out of state. Please I don't think I should be punished for wanting to leave state.Please help me

I think alot is going to depend on your reasons for wanting to move away. If they are valid reasons and not just trying to deny him his parental rights then there should not be a problem.

Also, have an alternative visitation schedule on paper that you would be willing to pay half the expenses at least for transportation back and forth, extended summers, all christmas... You will definitely need to show the court that you are not trying to deny him his rights.

 

[ROCHELLE VANCURA]

To ladyblu reply from Rochelle

You know in the begining I was angry at him.And I was blinded by fear, anger,but as time went by I let go of the anger. I used to take our son to him after we were divorced because he had no car,I made my family angry becuse I would jump when called I treid very hard to make sure he had a good relationship with his son. Then he got remarried and his visitaion started to be inconsistant.But I still would call and tell him about Dr. appt. and when was sick and what things he would do and say. I'v been remarried now for two years to a wonderful man and we all work together at makeing sure our son is happy.We even shared his birthdays with my ex and his wife. I keep him updated on everything but his visitation is limited to every other weekend and there are no attemps to call unless its time for a visit. In the month of oct.he saw him 2 days nov. 6 days. I am more than willing to work with him short of sacrificing my relationship with our son.Why is it that for two years I'v been married been divorced for 4 years.Am the total care giver 80% of the time and I feel like I'm taking something away from him. Right now I live an hour away and I have a phone,why can't he call once a week to talk to his son why dos'nt he put more effort to seeing his son. My door is an open door to my ex,he comes in my home sits down and talks to my husband. He didn't even call his son for christmas because he was mad that our son didn't want to go with him. He didn't even come and try to get him.But that I want to move I put under the microscope and disected and told I should be ashamed of myself for even thinking about moving HIS son away from him.I just don't understand He will get his visitation I will work him but at the same time I don't want to give him so much time I lose out on my sons life. Its not visitation its punishment for wanting to move away.The father hardly ever sees him when I live here but if I move He gets him half his life.Its not fair I am a good mother and I want to have a relationship with his dad. But I'm so afraid my ex can be two-faced I know he try to get custody,even though I,v been the sole care taker. I'm really worried

 

[LadyBlu]

Re: To ladyblu reply from Rochelle

You know in the begining I was angry at him.And I was blinded by fear, anger,but as time went by I let go of the anger. I used to take our son to him after we were divorced because he had no car,I made my family angry becuse I would jump when called I treid very hard to make sure he had a good relationship with his son. Then he got remarried and his visitaion started to be inconsistant.But I still would call and tell him about Dr. appt. and when was sick and what things he would do and say. I'v been remarried now for two years to a wonderful man and we all work together at makeing sure our son is happy.We even shared his birthdays with my ex and his wife. I keep him updated on everything but his visitation is limited to every other weekend and there are no attemps to call unless its time for a visit. In the month of oct.he saw him 2 days nov. 6 days. I am more than willing to work with him short of sacrificing my relationship with our son.Why is it that for two years I'v been married been divorced for 4 years.Am the total care giver 80% of the time and I feel like I'm taking something away from him. Right now I live an hour away and I have a phone,why can't he call once a week to talk to his son why dos'nt he put more effort to seeing his son. My door is an open door to my ex,he comes in my home sits down and talks to my husband. He didn't even call his son for christmas because he was mad that our son didn't want to go with him. He didn't even come and try to get him.But that I want to move I put under the microscope and disected and told I should be ashamed of myself for even thinking about moving HIS son away from him.I just don't understand He will get his visitation I will work him but at the same time I don't want to give him so much time I lose out on my sons life. Its not visitation its punishment for wanting to move away.The father hardly ever sees him when I live here but if I move He gets him half his life.Its not fair I am a good mother and I want to have a relationship with his dad. But I'm so afraid my ex can be two-faced I know he try to get custody,even though I,v been the sole care taker. I'm really worried

I completely understand what you are saying. I do hope you have kept a journal of everything, and how much you have tried to make the effort for NCP/child to have a relationship and how he hasnt made much effort at all.. I will keep you in my prayers and hope that this turns out for the best... just try to relax about it and dont get all worked up prior to the hearing.

 

[ROCHELLE VANCURA]

Thank you