Being framed for slander.....

[Need4Answers]

What is the name of your state? NY

My ex is placing things on the internet using an old screen name of mine and showing them to people who own a businesses in our town that I never posted. The things he is posting are things I would have no way of knowing, therefore, that alone should tell them I didn't do it, but they believe him not me. They are talking of suing me for slander. What can I do if I am served papers? How can I defend myself against these acusations? There is a big rivalry going on between all of us (the company he is lying to, myself and him) so it is not making me look good at all and I doubt they will believe me. He is harassing my friends at work, spreading terrible rumors and lies about me and just trying to make my life hell and the police won't do anything about it. How can I protect myself from him? The order of protection I already have doesnt do me any good and I can't prove he is making these posts, but I suppose they can't prove I did either. Any suggestions? Thanks!

 

[seniorjudge]

What is the name of your state? NY

My ex is placing things on the internet using an old screen name of mine and showing them to people who own a businesses in our town that I never posted. The things he is posting are things I would have no way of knowing, therefore, that alone should tell them I didn't do it, but they believe him not me. They are talking of suing me for slander. What can I do if I am served papers? How can I defend myself against these acusations? There is a big rivalry going on between all of us (the company he is lying to, myself and him) so it is not making me look good at all and I doubt they will believe me. He is harassing my friends at work, spreading terrible rumors and lies about me and just trying to make my life hell and the police won't do anything about it. How can I protect myself from him? The order of protection I already have doesnt do me any good and I can't prove he is making these posts, but I suppose they can't prove I did either. Any suggestions? Thanks!

I get asked similar questions all the time.

I always say that I do not know a way to make people stop talking bad about you. If I did, I have a list that I would go to work on.

BUT...about that old screen name: get it zotzed.

 

[meganproser]

Write a disclaimer stating that you no longer use the screen name in question, that you are not the author of the recent posts attributed to that screen name, that you have made no public statements about ”blank, blank, or blank” (businesses or persons), and that you invite anyone who has concerns about information supposedly disseminated by you, to contact you directly about said concerns.

Post or mail the disclaimer to as many people you can think of who may be affected or involved in this situation.

If you no longer associate with your ex, you may wish to add that information to the disclaimer, but I would not make any accusations about who has been writing under your old screen name.

They are talking of suing me for slander. What can I do if I am served papers? How can I defend myself against these acusations?

Ask them what they would like you to do about the situation, given that you are NOT writing these things?

so it is not making me look good at all and I doubt they will believe me.

Make a good faith effort to set the record straight.

He is harassing my friends at work, spreading terrible rumors and lies about me and just trying to make my life hell and the police won't do anything about it. How can I protect myself from him?

You would need to include more specific info as to exactly what he is doing to you.

I can't prove he is making these posts, but I suppose they can't prove I did either.

Just make sure you publicly acknowledge the fact that someone has been using YOUR name and that YOU are not the one writing these things. Let the victim worry about tracking down the real author.

 

[Need4Answers]

Very good adivse....just for the record, I did call them to explain that my ex is doing this but they are friends with him all of a sudden (they used to hate him so I don't know how this friendship came about). The wife said she was not concerned about it but that her husband was very angry and her son told me that his dad is going to his attorney to sue me for slander and anything else he can. His son is the one who told my daughter some of things posted and that it was "Really bad"... and I had way of knowing the things that were posted. I don't think a letter will help, but I can send one anyway, but it might just make them more angry. Should I do it before they start any action, or wait. I have not heard anything and it has been about 2 weeks so I would think if they are going to do something they would have done it by now don't you?

The harassing things include this, as well as other posts he found that are mine, but that he altered to fit his needs (he cut and pasted something I said and then printed it out, but would not show it to me only his attorney). One of his girlfriends works at a public store as does a friend of mine and he found out my friend simply spoke to his girlfriend (not about me or him at all, just normal conversation) and he tried to haver her fired and arrested for it - he even threatoning the store with a lawsuit. He has tried to get me fired from work making up lies like I stole from the company and used the postage meter (which I paid into the petty cash box for.....), all sorts of stuff. I have the order of protection, but the police really don't care much about that.

 

[seniorjudge]

Write a disclaimer stating that you no longer use the screen name in question, that you are not the author of the recent posts attributed to that screen name, that you have made no public statements about ”blank, blank, or blank” (businesses or persons), and that you invite anyone who has concerns about information supposedly disseminated by you, to contact you directly about said concerns.

Post or mail the disclaimer to as many people you can think of who may be affected or involved in this situation.

If you no longer associate with your ex, you may wish to add that information to the disclaimer, but I would not make any accusations about who has been writing under your old screen name.

They are talking of suing me for slander. What can I do if I am served papers? How can I defend myself against these acusations?

Ask them what they would like you to do about the situation, given that you are NOT writing these things?

so it is not making me look good at all and I doubt they will believe me.

Make a good faith effort to set the record straight.

He is harassing my friends at work, spreading terrible rumors and lies about me and just trying to make my life hell and the police won't do anything about it. How can I protect myself from him?

You would need to include more specific info as to exactly what he is doing to you.

I can't prove he is making these posts, but I suppose they can't prove I did either.

Just make sure you publicly acknowledge the fact that someone has been using YOUR name and that YOU are not the one writing these things. Let the victim worry about tracking down the real author.

Of course none of this advice will work to stop the slander and will just add fuel to the fire.

But have at it and see what happens!

 

[meganproser]

Of course none of this advice will work to stop the slander

It won’t? If I see some defamatory posts written under YOUR name and YOU come forward to announce that YOU are not the author of those posts, as far as I’m concerned, the posts would cease to have any credibility.

If the real author lacks the integrity to use his real name and is enough of an ass to use someone else’s name, why would I or anyone else give credence to his allegations?

In OP’s case, if she didn’t write the offensive posts, she may not have any legal obligation to counter them with a disclaimer, but it does seem the responsible, decent thing to do, given her awareness of the fraudulent use of her name.

The OP could have serious problems proving her own innocence if the victims choose to sue her. The BEST thing she can do to protect herself from being held responsible is to publicly acknowledge the posts and deny having written them. In fact I believe her FAILURE to do so, in the absence of proof that someone else wrote the posts (such proof being VERY difficult to obtain), will guarantee her liability for damages.

 

[meganproser]

Need4Answers: I did call them to explain that my ex is doing this but they are friends with him

You can’t prove what was said in the phone call. Write your disclaimer (leave your thoughts as to possible suspects out of it), mail it to them via certified mail, certified email, registered US mail, regular email with receipt, and record all methods that you used to notify them.

I don't think a letter will help, but I can send one anyway, but it might just make them more angry.

You are not writing the letter for THEIR benefit. You are writing it to protect yourself from liability for something that is being done in your name. How exactly can they become more angry, if you are willing to state publicly that you never said these offensive things about them?

Should I do it before they start any action

You should do it now. If someone is making statements under YOUR name, why wouldn’t you have moved IMMEDIATELY to correct such nonsense?

I would think if they are going to do something they would have done it by now don't you?

They have at least a year to sue you.

The harassing things include this, as well as other posts he found that are mine, but that he altered to fit his needs (he cut and pasted something I said and then printed it out, but would not show it to me only his attorney).

I hope you have and are keeping copies of your original writings. If he can’t authenticate his copies, he can’t do any harm with them.

One of his girlfriends works at a public store as does a friend of mine and he found out my friend simply spoke to his girlfriend (not about me or him at all, just normal conversation) and he tried to haver her fired and arrested for it - he even threatoning the store with a lawsuit.

Whatever went on there is between your friend and your ex. You can’t control what the two of them do to one another.

He has tried to get me fired from work making up lies like I stole from the company and used the postage meter (which I paid into the petty cash box for.....), all sorts of stuff.

That is between you and your employer. If your employer chooses to listen to your ex, there is nothing you can do about it.

 

[Need4Answers]

Just for the record, I did record the telephone conversation. The wife said she was not concerned but that her husband was pissed off, so I have the tape of me telling her it was not me. My ex did a pretty good job as making them think it was me though, they are pretty convinced. But I will send them a certified letter. Thanks for your input!

 

[meganproser]

It's pretty difficult to get tapes admitted as evidence and depending on NY law, it may not have been legal for you to tape the conversation!

Good luck!

 

[seniorjudge]

It's pretty difficult to get tapes admitted as evidence and depending on NY law, it may not have been legal for you to tape the conversation!

Good luck!

Cite legal authority backing up your two assertions, please.

Thank you.

 

[meganproser]

What assertions? The assertion that it is DIFFICULT to get tape admitted? Or the assertion that it MAY be against the law to tape a conversation?

I hardly think there is legal authority that addresses either statement.

I am not interested in providing citations for you SJ. The last time I complied with your request, you neglected to return to the thread to respond to it.

 

[seniorjudge]

I am not interested in providing citations for you SJ. The last time I complied with your request, you neglected to return to the thread to respond to it.

Thank you for responding in the prior thread...although I don't remember it at the moment.

 

[luciamay]

I am in the same situation

I am in the same situation as you. I can help you with this matter! Email me privately if you want to know more on how i can help you.

What is the name of your state? NY

My ex is placing things on the internet using an old screen name of mine and showing them to people who own a businesses in our town that I never posted. The things he is posting are things I would have no way of knowing, therefore, that alone should tell them I didn't do it, but they believe him not me. They are talking of suing me for slander. What can I do if I am served papers? How can I defend myself against these acusations? There is a big rivalry going on between all of us (the company he is lying to, myself and him) so it is not making me look good at all and I doubt they will believe me. He is harassing my friends at work, spreading terrible rumors and lies about me and just trying to make my life hell and the police won't do anything about it. How can I protect myself from him? The order of protection I already have doesnt do me any good and I can't prove he is making these posts, but I suppose they can't prove I did either. Any suggestions? Thanks!