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Being sued for child support after an adoption??????

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jacksonsmith222

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Oklahoma

A step parent adoption had been completed on my teen son about six months ago and then the child support was then canceled by DHS. I was divorced ten years ago and I had paid the ex directly myself for a year until she obtained services by DHS and thus we had DHS withhold child support and send to her all these years until the adoption was finalized. Now all of a sudden, the ex is trying to say that she wants to file contempt for back support, saying that I never paid her for the first year we were divorced prior to DHS getting involved. DHS only has records of all the money sent in from my withholdings from when they handled it. I did pay her directly cash for that year and after ten years have no records to prove it. I don't know why she is doing this, but what defenses do I have against her case? How does the finalized adoption play into this as well?
 


stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Very few. Fact is - you "gifted" her the money. You will probably be ordered to pay the arrears. Plus interest.
 

single317dad

Senior Member
What did your court order say about paying child support?
Were you ordered to pay your ex directly? Some states' laws categorizing direct payments as gifts are relatively new on the books.
What proof do you have that you made regular payments to her in the amount of the child support order?
When DHS got the second order with wage withholding, what did that order say regarding arrears at that time?

There is no SoL on back support in Oklahoma, so if you are indeed adjudged to owe the money, you'll have to pay it, no matter how long it takes.
 

jacksonsmith222

Junior Member
What did your court order say about paying child support?
Were you ordered to pay your ex directly? Some states' laws categorizing direct payments as gifts are relatively new on the books.
What proof do you have that you made regular payments to her in the amount of the child support order?
When DHS got the second order with wage withholding, what did that order say regarding arrears at that time?

There is no SoL on back support in Oklahoma, so if you are indeed adjudged to owe the money, you'll have to pay it, no matter how long it takes.
My divorce decree said nothing about how to pay the support, only how much monthly. The two of us verbally agreed that I would pay her directly. A year later, she remarried and moved to another state and then had that state withhold my wages for support; the papers coming from the child support agency only stated that I was behind three months from the date that she signed up for their services, which I had paid once withholding began. She claims the agency can only collect from the time of their services, and so she could not collect "what she was owed beforehand"...which I know that she could have filed a contempt with court at the time if she thought I owed her money but she did not. I do not have proof of the direct payments made for two reasons, one, some were in cash, and two, some were in money orders to which since it has been over a decade, I no longer have the stubs too over a few years of moving around. Since she wanted her husband to adopt my son, I figured everything was over completely because I am not in arrears according to the child support agency and adoption terminates my obligations. She herself did not say anything to me about any past due support either during this time. Now, after child support has been terminated due to the adoption, the agency refunded me two months of money back to me because they said the timing of the adoption canceled my obligations for that time period. However, the money had previously been sent to her and now the agency is telling her she must pay them back for the money they refunded me which made her mad. I assume at the adoption hearing, she and her husband had to have been made aware that my obligation to pay child support would be terminated? It seems that she is now mad about the situation and that I had sent in proof of the adoption to cancel support. I figure that this is why she is now trying to file contempt for child support because it has been terminated due to adoption and because she knows that I have no way of proving that I paid her directly for that first year after our divorce. Someone on AVVO had mentioned that I could use equitable estoppel to fight the contempt because over a decade has passed in addition to the adoption....do you have any knowledge in that area?
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
First thing that comes to mind is the doctrine of laches
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laches_(equity)

why is Mom just bringing this up and not in the past 10 years? I would see an attorney if the cost to defend is less than the amount mom claims was not paid.
 

I'mTheFather

Senior Member
According to this:

http://www.oscn.net/applications/oscn/DeliverDocument.asp?CiteID=440992

The mother should have included the arrearage in her application for services. I think you can argue that her sworn statement to DHS indicated that there was no arrearage.
 

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