Bullying In School How can I as a parent help!!!!!

[stefstanley]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? ARIZONA
Hi, I have a 13 year old daughter that has recently began a new school year with a new principal. And since the first day of school has had nothing but problems going on a month now. First it started out as she said he said stuff, which all kids go throw, but it was getting worse and worse then all of the threat stated, so I call the school and after a week of going in to talk to the princial and leaveing hand written,and phone messeages to try to speak to the new principal well he didn't call so I just decided to change my child schedule so that my daughter and the other girl did ot have any classes together well I no more got home and my child was in the bath room screaming and crying useing another students cell phone in the bath room stall where the bullting student had followed her and was kicking the door of the stall scream at my child needless to say I was the in a matter of seconds and told them where my child was and what was going on of couse they would let me back throw the doors so thhey sent someone in there so when my child was found she was very up set and the bully was no where to be found I decide that this principaial was going to talk to me and something need to be done well of cource he said he would in fact take care of it. Well the nexted day I sent my child thinking it was okay and well I got a phone call once again only this time it was my daughter stateing that the bully had pushed her from behind and then kicked her in the back so I went up there again and once aagain waited for the principal and of course it would be taken care of by the end of the day so that my child woulf finally be able to sleep hopefully because she had been getting sick and not being able to sleep. So he said he would call me later and let me no what the out come was he also asked my daughter to write a detailed letter and leave it on him desk it was what he call a formal complaint well he never called once again and that night there where several calls to my home stateing this other student was going to bring a knife to school and shut my daughter up so I am at this point very concerned for my childs safety and very very angery at this principal who never seems to call so I had my daughter stay home and went to the school to see what was going on and to let them no about the knife well he hadn't done one thing not one so I am VERY< VERY mad and told him i WAS GOING TO CALL THE POLICE AND THE SUPERINTENDANT AND SOMETHING was going to be done so that I knew that my daughter was safe well to make a very long story some what short the ploce said it was a civil matter that need to be handled by the school, I then met with the superintendant and the so called principal who did not care once again any way to date I am still haveing problems and have call the police a few time the principal several times the superintendent, preisident of the school board the vice present and now i am trying to get an injunction from the court which said this is a school matter and really thinks i am wasteing his time. now I am a month in to this and the principal is sick of me so he seems to now target my daughter. I told him very clearly along with the superintendant and the school board presedent that I did not want I wasn't going to allow them to pull my daughter from call so she could confront this bully unless I was there and the other childs father as well, and of course what did he do he did just that and the reason I did not want it to happen like that was because my daughter was to up set and i did not want the bully to see her crying and have it it any worse but as the principal stated to me after he already had done it anyway he said he really did not care what I thought and in his school he is the boss and he was going to do it any way he wanted He actuley pulled my child from class and she at that point told him she would go with him but she need to call her mom first so I could be there and this so called man representing the school told her that he would call me when he was done and she once again told him no she was instructed to call her mom he said if she did not do what she was told he woud write her up for insaboardanotion and not following a school afficials orders and then he would put her in in school suspention and then she could tell her mom after school and by that time he would be gone so here is my question; WHAT RIGHT DID MY CHILD HAVE IN THIS MATTER? wHAT RIGHTS DO I HAVE AS A PARENT,because according to the principal and the ploice I don't seem to have any HELP!!!!

 

[Crazed98]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? ARIZONA
Hi, I have a 13 year old daughter that has recently began a new school year with a new principal. And since the first day of school has had nothing but problems going on a month now. First it started out as she said he said stuff, which all kids go throw, but it was getting worse and worse then all of the threat stated, so I call the school and after a week of going in to talk to the princial and leaveing hand written,and phone messeages to try to speak to the new principal well he didn't call so I just decided to change my child schedule so that my daughter and the other girl did ot have any classes together well I no more got home and my child was in the bath room screaming and crying useing another students cell phone in the bath room stall where the bullting student had followed her and was kicking the door of the stall scream at my child needless to say I was the in a matter of seconds and told them where my child was and what was going on of couse they would let me back throw the doors so thhey sent someone in there so when my child was found she was very up set and the bully was no where to be found I decide that this principaial was going to talk to me and something need to be done well of cource he said he would in fact take care of it. Well the nexted day I sent my child thinking it was okay and well I got a phone call once again only this time it was my daughter stateing that the bully had pushed her from behind and then kicked her in the back so I went up there again and once aagain waited for the principal and of course it would be taken care of by the end of the day so that my child woulf finally be able to sleep hopefully because she had been getting sick and not being able to sleep. So he said he would call me later and let me no what the out come was he also asked my daughter to write a detailed letter and leave it on him desk it was what he call a formal complaint well he never called once again and that night there where several calls to my home stateing this other student was going to bring a knife to school and shut my daughter up so I am at this point very concerned for my childs safety and very very angery at this principal who never seems to call so I had my daughter stay home and went to the school to see what was going on and to let them no about the knife well he hadn't done one thing not one so I am VERY< VERY mad and told him i WAS GOING TO CALL THE POLICE AND THE SUPERINTENDANT AND SOMETHING was going to be done so that I knew that my daughter was safe well to make a very long story some what short the ploce said it was a civil matter that need to be handled by the school, I then met with the superintendant and the so called principal who did not care once again any way to date I am still haveing problems and have call the police a few time the principal several times the superintendent, preisident of the school board the vice present and now i am trying to get an injunction from the court which said this is a school matter and really thinks i am wasteing his time. now I am a month in to this and the principal is sick of me so he seems to now target my daughter. I told him very clearly along with the superintendant and the school board presedent that I did not want I wasn't going to allow them to pull my daughter from call so she could confront this bully unless I was there and the other childs father as well, and of course what did he do he did just that and the reason I did not want it to happen like that was because my daughter was to up set and i did not want the bully to see her crying and have it it any worse but as the principal stated to me after he already had done it anyway he said he really did not care what I thought and in his school he is the boss and he was going to do it any way he wanted He actuley pulled my child from class and she at that point told him she would go with him but she need to call her mom first so I could be there and this so called man representing the school told her that he would call me when he was done and she once again told him no she was instructed to call her mom he said if she did not do what she was told he woud write her up for insaboardanotion and not following a school afficials orders and then he would put her in in school suspention and then she could tell her mom after school and by that time he would be gone so here is my question; WHAT RIGHT DID MY CHILD HAVE IN THIS MATTER? wHAT RIGHTS DO I HAVE AS A PARENT,because according to the principal and the ploice I don't seem to have any HELP!!!!

WOW!!! So they got trailer parks in Arizona now?

 

[stefstanley]

Sorry crazed98, That you have enough time on your hands to be very rude, what was there a long line at the welfare office so you had some free time to be a jerk and comment on a matter involveing a child. Dose this make you feel like a great person or what. Yes, by the way they do have trailer parks here in Arizona, why are you thinkinking about moveing soon? Sorry they don't take food stamps for rent here! Why don't you get a life! Because it seem that you have way to much time on your hands.

 

[HomeGuru]

Sorry crazed98, That you have enough time on your hands to be very rude, what was there a long line at the welfare office so you had some free time to be a jerk and comment on a matter involveing a child. Dose this make you feel like a great person or what. Yes, by the way they do have trailer parks here in Arizona, why are you thinkinking about moveing soon? Sorry they don't take food stamps for rent here! Why don't you get a life! Because it seem that you have way to much time on your hands.

**A: please tell us the hightest grade level of education you completed.

 

[stefstanley]

HomeGuru, to whom are you referring to?

 

[pojo2]

If no one can stand it long enough to get through your post (put in a few paragraphs etc) then no one can answer you rationally.

Having said that and having read only aoubt 1/3 of the post, I will say the more you make of this the greater the problem will be.

 

[Crazed98]

Sorry crazed98, That you have enough time on your hands to be very rude, what was there a long line at the welfare office so you had some free time to be a jerk and comment on a matter involveing a child. Dose this make you feel like a great person or what. Yes, by the way they do have trailer parks here in Arizona, why are you thinkinking about moveing soon? Sorry they don't take food stamps for rent here! Why don't you get a life! Because it seem that you have way to much time on your hands.

Too bad they don't take your food stamps for rent. My heart goes out to you.

But before anyone helps you with your question can you take this quick quiz and tell us how you did: What is the '-ing' form of these verbs?

 

[stealth2]

Hon - paragraphs and punctuation are your friends. That had to have been the longest run-on sentence I've every seen, and hardly anyone is going to wade through it to try and figure out what the situation is or what your question might be. Break it up into paragraphs, use standard capitalization and punctuation, and get rid of all the emotional stuff. Just tell us in a nutshell what the issue is and what your question is. Thanks.

 

[damnclassybroad]

Cant anyone on this site be some what proffessional? This lady is asking for help for her daughter and your are grading her post

I am a 6th grade teacher in AZ The state has passed a no bullying law that has just gone into effect. I do not know too much about this law but I believe you can find it on the ADE website. Most districts have a link to this site on their homepages ,usually refering to state testing. I would call the Az dept of Education and find out who to make this complaint to or you may try a local tv Station that has its own investigative component such as 3 on your side, Fox news investigates and channel 12 has one as well.
I wish you the best. You may want to enroll your daughter in some self defense classes so that she can defend herself, if the need arisies.

 

[notsmartmark]

am a 6th grade teacher in AZ The state has passed a no bullying law that has just gone into effect. I do not know too much about this law but I believe you can find it on the ADE website.

Here's some information. The bullying laws do not guarantee that bullying will not occur. What must be in place are procedures that ensure that complaints will be addressed. It is very difficult to read the post, and I understand that we are only hearing one side, but here are some things that I could find in the post after the complaint was raised.

1. Schedules were changed to separate the students.
2. A formal, written complaint was solicited from the complaining student.
3. Parents meetings were conducted.
4. Students were interviewed and student meetings were conducted.

Mom is unhappy with the results, but the school seems to have met any rules I have seen regarding bullying, harassment and intimidation.

The most serious charge occurred outside of school, about the knife, and is the responsibility of the police department.

 

[nancysclassname]

Aren't verbal threats to kill or injure someone with a knife a criminal matter? I had a simular situation in Va a Long time ago. I filed charges myself against the child in question. In court the Judge told the young man in question if he didn't shape up he would be seeing him and he would not be happy about the end result. The Judge spoke to both parents and made it abundantly clear that they needed to keep their child in line.

Good Luck.

 

[DEeyore]

Unfortunately, bullying has been around since the beginning of schooling and will probably be around until all people are going to be forced to home school their kids.

Back when I was in school, I was definitely one of the more "individualist" type of kids, and for that, I was picked on and accused of being a devil worshipper because I listened to hard rock/heavy metal. It definitely did not help matters that I went to Catholic school. This was way before the days of Columbine, and while I don't in any way condone what those students did, I definitely can relate to being singled out as a freak because I was different. That isn't to say that I came up with an elaborate plan to exact revenge on the students and teachers who treated me this way, or even pondered the idea, for that matter, but when bullying reaches a level to where kids are bringing guns to school and killing one another because of these situations, there's definitely something wrong with the way things are being handled.

Case in point: When my nephews were attending public school in Philadelphia, there were a group of students who were bussed in from another neighborhood to attend the school that they were going to. I guess because they were frustrated with being in an unfamiliar neighborhood and discriminated against because of their race, they stuck together and picked on the kids who lived in the neighborhood. When I explained this to my older nephew, he went out of his way to befriend some of these students and they found out that they had much more in common than they had originally thought. They discovered that they all liked to play the Yu Gi Oh! card game, and they would often play the game during after-school care. Kids are kids, and once they find some sort of common ground that they can relate on, it eases the tension between them. By the end of last year, my nephew received a reward from his school for being the "most thoughtful student" in his class.

This year is an entirely different story. My brother-in-law received a promotion and their family had to move upstate in order for him to take the position. Since the first day of school, my older nephew, who is now twelve, has been picked on by a group of older boys on his bus. One of the boys is fifteen years old, and because of the fact that my nephew is big for his age, this boy is constantly threatening to beat him up after school. This is done on the school bus, and although my sister has spoken with the bus driver about this, the only suggestion he has made is that my nephew find another student to sit next to so that this boy will be less reluctant to single him out. This has not worked. After the boy threatened to beat the boy who was sitting next to my nephew on the bus, he won't sit next to my nephew anymore. Since the boy who is picking on him goes to a different school than the one that my nephews attend, there is no way to get the school involved, either.

This escalated to the point to where about a month ago, my nephews and a friend of theirs were playing down by the lake in the gated community where they all live and they were approached by this boy and another friend of his, and the boy who has been threatening my nephew once again said that he was going to "kick his butt." Out of fear, my nephew showed him a comb that was shaped like a knife and the boys ran away. An hour later, a State Trooper was at my sister's door saying that my nephew had pulled a knife on this boy. After a strict talking to by both my sister, brother-in-law and the Trooper, my nephew admitted that what he had done was stupid, but that after putting up with months of this kid's taunting, he figured that if he showed him the "comb knife" that the boy would believe that he carried a knife for protection and leave him alone. When the Trooper interviewed the boy my nephew pulled the comb knife on, he not only lied and said that it was a real fishing knife, but also that he had shot a pellet gun on him a few weeks before that. My nephew doesn't even own a fishing knife or a pellet gun, for that matter. This boy, on the other hand has been reprimanded on more than one occasion for shooting off his pellet gun at animals and other kids. The thing that all of us were concerned with was the possibility that had this boy gone home and gotten a real knife, my nephew could have paid for that stupid stunt with his life.

He's way too young to remember this, but nine years ago a girl was stabbed to death at a carnival here in Philly because a group of teenagers egged her and another girl on into getting into a fight with one another. Apparently, the girl who stabbed the other girl pulled out the knife to show the other girls and try to scare them away. When another girl pushed the victim into her, the knife went into her chest and punctured her lung and she bled to death. The reason this fight even started? Because one group of girls was from one school and the other group was from another. Friends of mine who were there that night told me that the two girls didn't even know each other and had no reason to fight one another in the first place. So one girl lost her life that night and the other is currently serving a murder sentence over a moment of stupidity.

So yet again, I had to explain to my nephew that no matter what his intentions were, things could end tragically if you handle things the wrong way. My sister and the boy who has been taunting him all year long's mother have had several conversations, and even though the mother of this boy has promised that he isn't going to bother my nephew anymore, things have only gotten worse. Just the other day, he came home from school saying that this boy was calling him a sexually discriminatory slur, and still, this bus driver won't intervene. It's getting to the point to where he doesn't even want to go to school anymore because he dreads getting on that bus every day. When my sister had a running vehicle, she used to drop him off and pick him up just so he could avoid this kid, but her car broke down and he doesn't have an alternative ride to school.

Never in a million years would I have thought that this type of thing could happen in a gated community, as opposed to a big city, but apparently, bullying isn't just isolated to any one area.