California Family Code section 7610

[Janice2020]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

I have a 1 month old son, his father left me a couple weeks before I gave birth. Father was at the birth & signed paternity papers, really loves his son and where I don't think he's made enough effort to see him consistently, he does usually take him a few hours a week and has had 2 overnights. I have let the father see his son any time he's wanted so far since I'm still off work, except for once when he wanted to take our son to his parents for 3 days which I felt was too long and I didn't have enough stored milk to send, and once after he was angry with me and not seen his son in 2 days he text he was on his way over to see him and we were in the middle of breastfeeding and I told him to give me more time & he could come back anytime after we were done (so he threw a fit and didn't come at all).

We are currently in agreement with custody/visitation/child support. Unfortunately, he becomes very unreasonable when he gets angry or we disagree on anything (mainly refusing to come see his son because he is mad at me saying he needs to calm down & not have his son when he's angry), so I would not mind getting it officially put in writing and signed by a judge so it's enforceable, but since we're agreeing & he's not angry with me right now, he's no longer threatening to take me to court.

I have read that under California Family Code section 7610 an unwed mother automatically has custody and determines who/when people see the child and basically makes all decisions for the child. Is this still true even if the father signs the paternity forms in the hospital? I would never keep my child from his father, my only concern is if the father gets angry with me and tries to keep him from me, I don't want law enforcement to say I can't get my child back at our agreed time because we don't have orders signed by a judge. So if I already have "legal" custody and am protected I am okay with not going to court.

Also in our talk the father said he wanted 49% legal custody. This seems odd to me, because I would think giving me 51% would allow me to make all decisions for my son & not really give him any say. Is that correct? I want what's best for my son and am not interested in having total control to keep him away from his father in any way, my only concern is from the fathers history of not being able to be reasonable when he is angry for any reason.

Thank you!

 

[Janice2020]

California law section 7610 unwed Mother’s have sole custody starting from birth,I was wondering since my baby been born the father isn’t on the birth certificate but he took me to court for paternity and still no child support,I have let the father come see the baby once a month his asked to see the baby once a month now baby is turning 9 months and I’m tired of him coming here fighting with me that his gonna take the baby for one day I don’t let him his threatened and yelled at my parents as well do I have a right to stop letting him come see the baby,I don’t get financial help from him in anyway and I’ve been trying to work with him but Im done dealing with his bad temper,all he does is argue when he visits the baby,I don’t know if I should take him to court now or just wait it out till he takes me?also We have both been arrested for domestic abuse in the past so he is a threat to my child but I live with my parents so it prevents him from fighting with me can his visitations be taken a way if I go to court and show proof his unstable parent?

 

[Ohiogal]

California law section 7610 unwed Mother’s have sole custody starting from birth,I was wondering since my baby been born the father isn’t on the birth certificate but he took me to court for paternity and still no child support,I have let the father come see the baby once a month his asked to see the baby once a month now baby is turning 9 months and I’m tired of him coming here fighting with me that his gonna take the baby for one day I don’t let him his threatened and yelled at my parents as well do I have a right to stop letting him come see the baby,I don’t get financial help from him in anyway and I’ve been trying to work with him but Im done dealing with his bad temper,all he does is argue when he visits the baby,I don’t know if I should take him to court now or just wait it out till he takes me?also We have both been arrested for domestic abuse in the past so he is a threat to my child but I live with my parents so it prevents him from fighting with me can his visitations be taken a way if I go to court and show proof his unstable parent?

Child support is NOT an admission fee to see the child. If dad sues you, he will get visitation. He is unstable? You are as well. You chose him. He owes you NOTHING unless there is a court order.

 

[t74]

You need to get yourself to a counselor and co -parenting class. You are at the beginning of a very long journey and are badly in need of an attitude adjustment. Your immaturity - as well as irresponsibility - is showing. You need to grow up and stop whining about him who you cannot change and work on yourself who you can.

Quit complaining about not getting child support. Unless it is ordered, he owes you nothing. And for a reality check, many custodial parents do not received ordered child support. You need to get yourself a job or two or three so you can provide financially for your child on your own in case he is one who manages to avoid paying support.

If you did not want him near you and your SHARED child, you should have placed the child for adoption. Once he is deemed to be the father and visitation is ordered, you better be prepared to comply with the orders. A failure to do so will place you at risk of becoming the NCP.

The best way your parents can help you at this time is to assist you in getting an attorney who will tell you in no uncertain terms your rights and responsibilities.

 

[LdiJ]

California law section 7610 unwed Mother’s have sole custody starting from birth,I was wondering since my baby been born the father isn’t on the birth certificate but he took me to court for paternity and still no child support,I have let the father come see the baby once a month his asked to see the baby once a month now baby is turning 9 months and I’m tired of him coming here fighting with me that his gonna take the baby for one day I don’t let him his threatened and yelled at my parents as well do I have a right to stop letting him come see the baby,I don’t get financial help from him in anyway and I’ve been trying to work with him but Im done dealing with his bad temper,all he does is argue when he visits the baby,I don’t know if I should take him to court now or just wait it out till he takes me?also We have both been arrested for domestic abuse in the past so he is a threat to my child but I live with my parents so it prevents him from fighting with me can his visitations be taken a way if I go to court and show proof his unstable parent?

Has paternity actually been established? You said that he took you to court but you did not say whether or not paternity had been established.

I think that the previous poster was a little harsh. Yes, you do need to understand that the dad has rights and if he wants to exercise his rights through the court he will get his rights to joint legal custody (joint decision making) and a parenting schedule. He will also be responsible for child support. Once court orders are in place both of you will have to obey them, but you don't get to stop parenting time for dad if he doesn't pay child support, and he isn't legally allowed to stop paying child support if you disobey the parenting time orders. Parenting time and child support are completely separate things.

If all he does is fight with you and argue and show his temper when he is visiting the baby then yes, its probably time for court orders. Court orders protect everyone, including the child.

 

[Ohiogal]

LD is biased towards the mother in all cases. Please realize that. I AM A GAL and Attorney> As a GAL I speak for the child. LD doesn't. She speaks for her bias.

 

[t74]

Court orders protect everyone. but especially the CHILD.

 

[not2cleverRed]

California law section 7610 unwed Mother’s have sole custody starting from birth,I was wondering since my baby been born the father isn’t on the birth certificate but he took me to court for paternity and still no child support,I have let the father come see the baby once a month his asked to see the baby once a month now baby is turning 9 months and I’m tired of him coming here fighting with me that his gonna take the baby for one day I don’t let him his threatened and yelled at my parents as well do I have a right to stop letting him come see the baby,I don’t get financial help from him in anyway and I’ve been trying to work with him but Im done dealing with his bad temper,all he does is argue when he visits the baby,I don’t know if I should take him to court now or just wait it out till he takes me?also We have both been arrested for domestic abuse in the past so he is a threat to my child but I live with my parents so it prevents him from fighting with me can his visitations be taken a way if I go to court and show proof his unstable parent?

You have both been arrested for domestic abuse in the past? Then don't try and paint him as unstable or unfit to parent. Focus on improving your own parenting skills.

Unless he is a danger to the child, he will not lose visitation if you take him to court - in fact, given what you have shared, it is likely that a court would award him more visitation than the current once a month you are allowing him. I don't know what you think that you have "proof" of, but you've no evidence that he has mistreated the child. It sounds like you are bored with the inconvenience of visitation.

 

[stealth2]

LD is biased towards the mother in all cases. Please realize that. I AM A GAL and Attorney> As a GAL I speak for the child. LD doesn't. She speaks for her bias.

However, LDi's post in this thread was pretty spot-on.