• FreeAdvice has a new Terms of Service and Privacy Policy, effective May 25, 2018.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our Terms of Service and use of cookies.

Can a father take the kids out of state?

Accident - Bankruptcy - Criminal Law / DUI - Business - Consumer - Employment - Family - Immigration - Real Estate - Tax - Traffic - Wills   Please click a topic or scroll down for more.

StormyNormy

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida

I have only written one thread before, but I will try again. I do have one specific question.

If the mother is the primary custody parent, can the father take the children out of the state for a vacation? On the divorce papers, all it says is that both parents must be in agreement of where the children go with other and give permision. So far the mother does not want the kids to go with dad out of state. The kids don't want to go either. The oldest, almost 13, doesn't feel safe with her dad and stepmom. She doesn't feel that she will be taken care off.

The father has told the kids so far, without discussion with their mother, that they "will going to New York whether their mother likes it or not" for he is the other parent.

Reasons as to why my sister objects:

1. Prior history of physical child abuse by both the dad and stepmom, despite that they are both cops.

2. The dad does not feed the children and leaves them alone and unsupervised to many times. This is documented by psychologist that the children have told this to. This just happened again this Saturday when the dad lied to my sister and worked all day and left their son home all alone and he played outside in the front yard alone and unsupervised. He didn't have anyone to give his medications to, important medications that he needs to decrease his fluid in his brain, he has hydrocephalus, and he didn't eat breakfast or lunch. His dad arrived at home at 6:30 p.m. The dad lied to my sister and said that his wife was home all day long. The only reason we know the truth is that my niece called her step sister who was with my nephew, her brother, but is also to young to care for him. Both are 9 years old. The step-sister is mentally challenge and acts more like a 5 year old.

Because of these and other reasons, my sister doesn't trust her ex and the stepmom to take care of her children in New York. They are liars and teach the kids to lie. My nephew got home on Saturday and lied as well and said his stepmom was home with him, but later changed his story like three times. He got so confused what he was suppose to tell her. I feel bad for him and when he gets confused he says, "It is complicated."

3. The most important reason of all is the dad has a history of domestic violence with his new wife. She has filed an injunction against him, but later changed her mind, but I read it, she describes him as very violent. She filed a domestic violence against him in another county and I looked up that one which turned out to be a 911 call of a very bad and violent argument he had with this woman, his wife, in front of the children and about the children. He can get very angry and all I heard was a lot of throwing of things and banging of things. He was yelling out my niece and nephew as well in the recording.
 
Last edited:


Proserpina

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida

I have only written one thread before, but I will try again. I do have one specific question.

If the mother is the primary custody parent, can the father take the children out of the state for a vacation? On the divorce papers, all it says is that both parents must be in agreement of where the children go with other and give permision. So far the mother does not want the kids to go with dad out of state. The kids don't want to go either. The oldest, almost 13, doesn't feel safe with her dad and stepmom. She doesn't feel that she will be taken care off.
Are you absolutely sure that this restriction applies to vacations?

:

1. Prior history of physical child abuse by both the dad and stepmom, despite that they are both cops.
Is this proven?
 

Hisbabygirl77

Senior Member
Are you absolutely sure that this restriction applies to vacations?



Is this proven?
Well we know that isnt exactly what the order says or else the dad would have to get permission from the mom to take kiddies to mcdonalds shoot by her wording the dad would need permission to take kids to next door neighbors. So OP why dont you tell us exactly what the order states please.
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
Well we know that isnt exactly what the order says or else the dad would have to get permission from the mom to take kiddies to mcdonalds shoot by her wording the dad would need permission to take kids to next door neighbors. So OP why dont you tell us exactly what the order states please.
OP, listen. You need to be forthright. There is no history of abuse - there are allegations, as per your past post history, but NO proof and certainly NO charges or convictions.

Suggesting otherwise is NOT right.

I realize that the situation is fraught with emotion but you must stick to what is actually known, in the legal sense.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida

I have only written one thread before, but I will try again. I do have one specific question.

If the mother is the primary custody parent, can the father take the children out of the state for a vacation? On the divorce papers, all it says is that both parents must be in agreement of where the children go with other and give permision. So far the mother does not want the kids to go with dad out of state. The kids don't want to go either. The oldest, almost 13, doesn't feel safe with her dad and stepmom. She doesn't feel that she will be taken care off.

The father has told the kids so far, without discussion with their mother, that they "will going to New York whether their mother likes it or not" for he is the other parent.

Reasons as to why my sister objects:

1. Prior history of physical child abuse by both the dad and stepmom, despite that they are both cops.

2. The dad does not feed the children and leaves them alone and unsupervised to many times. This is documented by psychologist that the children have told this to. This just happened again this Saturday when the dad lied to my sister and worked all day and left their son home all alone and he played outside in the front yard alone and unsupervised. He didn't have anyone to give his medications to, important medications that he needs to decrease his fluid in his brain, he has hydrocephalus, and he didn't eat breakfast or lunch. His dad arrived at home at 6:30 p.m. The dad lied to my sister and said that his wife was home all day long. The only reason we know the truth is that my niece called her step sister who was with my nephew, her brother, but is also to young to care for him. Both are 9 years old. The step-sister is mentally challenge and acts more like a 5 year old.
Because of these and other reasons, my sister doesn't trust her ex and the stepmom to take care of her children in New York. They are liars and teach the kids to lie. My nephew got home on Saturday and lied as well and said his stepmom was home with him, but later changed his story like three times. He got so confused what he was suppose to tell her. I feel bad for him and when he gets confused he says, "It is complicated."

3. The most important reason of all is the dad has a history of domestic violence with his new wife. She has filed an injunction against him, but later changed her mind, but I read it, she describes him as very violent. She filed a domestic violence against him in another county and I looked up that one which turned out to be a 911 call of a very bad and violent argument he had with this woman, his wife, in front of the children and about the children. He can get very angry and all I heard was a lot of throwing of things and banging of things. He was yelling out my niece and nephew as well in the recording.
Regarding the bolded -- you are taking the word of a mentally challenged 9 year old over an adult? That will not get you anywhere. You admit that the child has the mentality of a 5 year old and yet you are choosing to believe that more so than the adults. Why? YOu really hate dad that much? Keep it up and I can see dad getting even MORE time with HIS children due to the fact that you are looking for ANY reason to degrade him.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
You need to tell us word for word what the court order says. Not what you are interpreting it to say.

That is the only way that we are going to be able to give any advice.

However, unless the court order specifically prohibits a parent from traveling out of state with the child (traveling, not relocating) then dad can do whatever he wants during his parenting time.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
2. The dad does not feed the children and leaves them alone and unsupervised to many times. This is documented by psychologist that the children have told this to. This just happened again this Saturday when the dad lied to my sister and worked all day and left their son home all alone and he played outside in the front yard alone and unsupervised. He didn't have anyone to give his medications to, important medications that he needs to decrease his fluid in his brain, he has hydrocephalus, and he didn't eat breakfast or lunch. His dad arrived at home at 6:30 p.m. The dad lied to my sister and said that his wife was home all day long. The only reason we know the truth is that my niece called her step sister who was with my nephew, her brother, but is also to young to care for him. Both are 9 years old. The step-sister is mentally challenge and acts more like a 5 year old.
So, your sister KNEW the children were unsupervised and did.... what? Apparently nothing. That doesn't make her look all that hot as a parent, to be honest.

Because of these and other reasons, my sister doesn't trust her ex and the stepmom to take care of her children in New York. They are liars and teach the kids to lie. My nephew got home on Saturday and lied as well and said his stepmom was home with him, but later changed his story like three times. He got so confused what he was suppose to tell her. I feel bad for him and when he gets confused he says, "It is complicated."
Ya know... kids often lie w/o being "taught". Of course the kid didn't know what he was supposed to tell Mom - He wants to keep both his parents happy, and putting him in the middle is very uncomfortable for him. Mom questioning him is as bad as telling him to keep a secret/lie.

Seriously - your sister needs to come on here and tell us exactly what is in her orders. Your sister, her orders. Not you.
 

StormyNormy

Junior Member
I don't know why some of you are so upset or angry at me. I have not lied or misrepresented anything in what I said. I sometimes don't know how to express myself as well as I can and people misunderstand me, but it doesn't matter anymore. My sister consulted an attorney today and she did do the right thing, according to this attorney, and not show up at the house to pick up her son. This attorney has many plans on catching these two liars. There will be psychological evaluation done on everyone. All the previous counselors that recommended supervised visitation with the dad will now be looked at by one forensic psychologist. This same forensic psychologist will do the evaluations. As far as the proof of the child abuse, DCF(Dept. of Children and Family) was called and they did five reports. Two of which were reported by counselors. Two of these reports came back as "physical abuse" yet they did nothing because it was not "to the extent of abuse they are use to seeing." That is what is on the report. Sad but true. One report said that the dad shows lack of supervision of the children, yet again no action because the children are primarily with my sister. If you want to believe it or not is up to you. I can't make you believe it, but it is the truth.

As far as my sister coming on here, unfortunately, her ex has done a good job in making her a mess emotionally since the divorce four years ago. He and his wife have made her life a living hell. She second guesses herself as a parent and had to deal with her sons' excessive and explosive anger for years. Why would she come on here if she will get ridiculed as some of you did with me now. It is just now nice. You don't know the whole story to judge so quickly, but it doesn't matter. I won't come on this forum again. I thought I could find advice and help for my sister, but I think I will stick with God and hope that this new attorney will do all she can to protect these kids. This attorney sees that these kids have suffered and heard the 911 call of how violent this dad can get and other proof that I can't go into. That is why I say you don't have the whole story, yet some of you tell me that I am keeping things from you. I just asked a simple question. As if turns out, this attorney said, this father should not be allowed to take these kids out of state and for now, she will try to get him at what he is best at: lying. By the way, my sister does not question her children. They come up to her or in her son's case, it comes out in rage and anger and than when he calms down, is when he talks and tells why he is so angry and it usually has to do with things he has bottled up inside of him. He has also revealed this to counselors and not just my sister. They have seen him go crazy in a rage and when he calms down they ask him questions, for I was there for one of these sessions, and sure enough it had to do with his dad. He loves his dad and hates him all at the same time. That is why he says it is "complicated."

For those of you who were nice and really tried to help, thank you. I would give you word for word what the divorce papers say, but I don't have them with me today for I gave them to my sister who saw the attorney today. You see, I help her keep things together, like the medical bills and all that for I am more organized than she is and that is why her folder is always here at my house and also because her oldest daughter is always trying to look into the divorce things.

Good bye and God Bless.
 

Find the Right Lawyer for Your Legal Issue!

Fast, Free, and Confidential
data-ad-format="auto">
Top