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Can I get a restraining order against my mother?

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Proserpina

Senior Member
I understand of the first notion, but like my mother's other absurd actions she'll keep sending me the gift (I've sent them back unopened). Can I get a block on her address? On the other subject when I originally dealt with her coming to my class I wasn't able to see her restrained and taken away by security. But I understand now that calling police/security is the appropriate action not.

I really appreciate all of the advice. It's just fairly difficult when someone is so persistent. In an ideal situation living states away from her would be enough. :confused::rolleyes:

Block her address? How would you ensure she didn't mail something from...the post office itself? A friend's house? The drop off box in the Mall?
 


commentator

Senior Member
She is persistent because that's how crazy people do it. Remember, "Doing the same thing over and over, and expecting different results"? You must be MORE persistent. Keep sending the checks back. How could you possibly say you couldn't stand to see her escorted off by police but you can say you'd like to see her institutionalized forever? That's inconsistent. You must be firm and persistent yourself, not just spend your time griping and wishing it didn't have to be this way. It is, this is the mommy you got, and you have to deal with her. Through the years, as you get older you may find that you've learned many valuable lessons from this experience. Good luck to you. Stay in counseling!
 
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single317dad

Senior Member
I understand of the first notion, but like my mother's other absurd actions she'll keep sending me the gift (I've sent them back unopened). Can I get a block on her address? On the other subject when I originally dealt with her coming to my class I wasn't able to see her restrained and taken away by security. But I understand now that calling police/security is the appropriate action not.

I really appreciate all of the advice. It's just fairly difficult when someone is so persistent. In an ideal situation living states away from her would be enough. :confused::rolleyes:
Every occupied dwelling I have ever entered has contained an "unwanted mail/package disposal bin".

Seriously, OP, I think you're doing a lot of this to yourself. If you don't learn some coping skills you're going to have a terrible life. Toss the mail, ignore the calls, change your number, and inform everyone who gets the new number that if they give it to Mom or relay any of her drama, they won't get the next new number. Worked wonders for me.
 

jukra

Junior Member
She is persistent because that's how crazy people do it. Remember, "Doing the same thing over and over, and expecting different results"? You must be MORE persistent. Keep sending the checks back. How could you possibly say you couldn't stand to see her escorted off by police but you can say you'd like to see her institutionalized forever? That's inconsistent. You must be firm and persistent yourself, not just spend your time griping and wishing it didn't have to be this way. It is, this is the mommy you got, and you have to deal with her. Through the years, as you get older you may find that you've learned many valuable lessons from this experience. Good luck to you. Stay in counseling!
I said I used to no be able to. I used to actually have some sort of faith in my mother, but over the past few months I've really realized that I've been setting myself up for failure. That I would be able to just resume a relationship with one day and she'd be this new changed person. Now I feel like I've caught myself up in the spider's web and I don't know how to get out. You've offered a lot of helpful advice. I guess I was just hoping for some miracle to happen and be able to banish her out of my life [easily].
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
You realize, I hope, that you cannot get a restraining order on your father's behalf, right? Nor does HE have to move for Mom to stop contacting YOU.
 

Shibshib

Junior Member
Wow, do we have the same mom?

All jokes aside, our situations sound almost identical. The best I have found was to hire a lawyer (on retainer) and communicate only through your lawyer to your mom about boundaries and if those are crossed to threaten to sue (for harassment) and then you will have a paper trail of your attempts (through your lawyer) to have no communication.
 

TheGeekess

Keeper of the Kraken
All jokes aside, our situations sound almost identical. The best I have found was to hire a lawyer (on retainer) and communicate only through your lawyer to your mom about boundaries and if those are crossed to threaten to sue (for harassment) and then you will have a paper trail of your attempts (through your lawyer) to have no communication.
One would think that OP had taken care of his/her problems in the TWO years since the original post.

This board prefers if one not necropost. It does not help ANYONE for a newbie to come in months or YEARS after an initial post and make a comment. :cool:
 

Macarbonadl

New member
Thanks everyone for sharing your thoughts/experiences. I am going through a similar situation and debating on wherher I should engage legal counsel. Will do my best to cope with it as an adult. Let me know if anyone had a “success” story with their deranged mothers.
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
Thanks everyone for sharing your thoughts/experiences. I am going through a similar situation and debating on wherher I should engage legal counsel. Will do my best to cope with it as an adult. Let me know if anyone had a “success” story with their deranged mothers.
1. This thread is 3 years old...Do not post to old threads.
2. If you have a question, start your own thread.
 
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