What is the name of your state? California
My son 18, recently revealed to us that a neighbor had been molesting him for a period of 6 years during elementary school. The neighbor is now 26 I believe, he was a teenager when he began doing this to our son. Here is the problem. My son released all this info to us and it has been overwhelming. We want to do what is best for him. We called our HMO and tried to get an appointment for him with mental health so he may get some counseling. They spoke to him since he was 18 now, and he told them it was a neighbor. They were so very concerned about reporting this to the police. I know that they must be legally bound to do so. We want what is best for our son. He does not want this to get out, he is humiliated by it. He doesn't want everyone to know as we live in a small suburb and news travels fast. They print every arrest in the local paper. We told the parents of this neighbor. About him...he still lives at home and has been on the edge of "special ed" in school. Diagnosed ADHD, high functioning (can drive a car and work) but is definitely odd. We have lived next to them for 14 years and up until learning this, considered them our "family". His parents understandably are upset. They are afraid we will press charges and he will have to go to prison, where he "will just kill himself", or they fear, someone else would kill him. The police have tried to contact my son twice but he told them he isn't ready to talk to them. He wants counseling but is scared that anyone he tells will have to tell the police what he says. He is just not ready for this to be public knowlege. On the other hand, aside from being scared for their son, they need to do something to get him help. He is a molester, quite possibly a pedophile. My son has had many problems focusing and following through even though his is extremely smart. When pressed on why, he finally told us in a wave of emotion. We will never know what kind of person he would have been had this boy-now a man, left him alone. I am so angry. I don't know where to get him help. Part of me says to press charges as there are kids in the neighborhood but part of me wants to protect my son from more pain. what are the guidelines/rules here? Do all counselors have to tell? He hasn't given the molesters name to anyone yet. Please help
My son 18, recently revealed to us that a neighbor had been molesting him for a period of 6 years during elementary school. The neighbor is now 26 I believe, he was a teenager when he began doing this to our son. Here is the problem. My son released all this info to us and it has been overwhelming. We want to do what is best for him. We called our HMO and tried to get an appointment for him with mental health so he may get some counseling. They spoke to him since he was 18 now, and he told them it was a neighbor. They were so very concerned about reporting this to the police. I know that they must be legally bound to do so. We want what is best for our son. He does not want this to get out, he is humiliated by it. He doesn't want everyone to know as we live in a small suburb and news travels fast. They print every arrest in the local paper. We told the parents of this neighbor. About him...he still lives at home and has been on the edge of "special ed" in school. Diagnosed ADHD, high functioning (can drive a car and work) but is definitely odd. We have lived next to them for 14 years and up until learning this, considered them our "family". His parents understandably are upset. They are afraid we will press charges and he will have to go to prison, where he "will just kill himself", or they fear, someone else would kill him. The police have tried to contact my son twice but he told them he isn't ready to talk to them. He wants counseling but is scared that anyone he tells will have to tell the police what he says. He is just not ready for this to be public knowlege. On the other hand, aside from being scared for their son, they need to do something to get him help. He is a molester, quite possibly a pedophile. My son has had many problems focusing and following through even though his is extremely smart. When pressed on why, he finally told us in a wave of emotion. We will never know what kind of person he would have been had this boy-now a man, left him alone. I am so angry. I don't know where to get him help. Part of me says to press charges as there are kids in the neighborhood but part of me wants to protect my son from more pain. what are the guidelines/rules here? Do all counselors have to tell? He hasn't given the molesters name to anyone yet. Please help
