can we agree to lower child support?

[akwaitress]

What is the name of your state? Alaska


There is a support order of $381.00 monthly with an arrearages of $25,800.00 can we legally agree to a change lowering the amount and somehow erase all or part of the arrearages?

 

[brisgirl825]

What is the name of your state? Alaska


There is a support order of $381.00 monthly with an arrearages of $25,800.00 can we legally agree to a change lowering the amount and somehow erase all or part of the arrearages?

Sure, it's your right but why would you want to?

 

[akwaitress]

interfers with relationship

I don't get it and I don't really need it. I don't believe he can afford it (it was set when he worked remote site). Mostly though I believe it impedes him having a relationship with his son.
My son is 13 and saw his father today for the first time in 9 years. He's in the state because his grandmother passed away. I have maintained a good relationship with his family and even took his grandmother to garage sales this summer. I however have no contact with his father and generally don't know what state he is in. We used to maintain a fairly good relationship and my son was able to maintain a closer relationship.
I believe the child support has overwhelmed him and he has dug himself in too deep. If a fresh start and a lower amount will allow my son a closer relationship with his father than I would be happy to do it.
However he leaves tommorrow evening after the funeral so I would like to give him a letter or something so that he knows that this is something that I would be willing to do. I will be attending the funeral with my son.

 

[LdiJ]

I don't get it and I don't really need it. I don't believe he can afford it (it was set when he worked remote site). Mostly though I believe it impedes him having a relationship with his son.
My son is 13 and saw his father today for the first time in 9 years. He's in the state because his grandmother passed away. I have maintained a good relationship with his family and even took his grandmother to garage sales this summer. I however have no contact with his father and generally don't know what state he is in. We used to maintain a fairly good relationship and my son was able to maintain a closer relationship.
I believe the child support has overwhelmed him and he has dug himself in too deep. If a fresh start and a lower amount will allow my son a closer relationship with his father than I would be happy to do it.
However he leaves tommorrow evening after the funeral so I would like to give him a letter or something so that he knows that this is something that I would be willing to do. I will be attending the funeral with my son.

381 a month is not an overwhelming amount of child support. I could see how the arrearages could be overwhelming, but you may be giving dad more credit than he is due. Nine years is a long time to go without making any effort at all to see your child.

What could easily happen is that even if you give him a fresh start, you still may not see any child support and he still may not attempt to be a father.

 

[NotSoNew]

I don't get it and I don't really need it. I don't believe he can afford it (it was set when he worked remote site). Mostly though I believe it impedes him having a relationship with his son.
My son is 13 and saw his father today for the first time in 9 years. He's in the state because his grandmother passed away. I have maintained a good relationship with his family and even took his grandmother to garage sales this summer. I however have no contact with his father and generally don't know what state he is in. We used to maintain a fairly good relationship and my son was able to maintain a closer relationship.
I believe the child support has overwhelmed him and he has dug himself in too deep. If a fresh start and a lower amount will allow my son a closer relationship with his father than I would be happy to do it.
However he leaves tommorrow evening after the funeral so I would like to give him a letter or something so that he knows that this is something that I would be willing to do. I will be attending the funeral with my son.

i say good for you! of course you can do it if you want to and its very nice of you to do so, even if it doesnt work out, if you dont need the money you know you did the best you could for your son to have a relationship with his father.

and while 381 a month may not be overwhelming to some it is to others who make less! I find that sometimes the child support guidelines can be redicioulous and hinder relationships a lot!

 

[akwaitress]

Its worth a try

Well we had a nice talk today and hopefully it will work out. I know it may not make difference but I would rather try and fail than wonder.
Do we just draw up an agreement and submit it to child support or do we need a lawyer?

 

[Bali Hai]

Well we had a nice talk today and hopefully it will work out. I know it may not make difference but I would rather try and fail than wonder.
Do we just draw up an agreement and submit it to child support or do we need a lawyer?

You'll probably need a lawyer. Don't forget that even if you both agree, the judge can trump that agreement. Judges have a tendency to believe they know what's "better" for you, than you do.

Since there are no tax issues, you both might consider a creative arrangement where he follows the court order and you reimburse him somehow.

If you change your mind in the future about the arrangement, you still have the original order.