READ my question correctly!
I don't know what kind of "professionals" you people are, but you can't even read a question correctly. You're all too busy giving stupid criticism about my choices in life, that I haven't gotten real legal advice. And as far as Ohiogal, I really wonder what kind of a lawyer you are because if all you can do is criticize people, then I really feel bad for any clients that hire you.
First, the father may pay child support, but otherwise he is not involved, that does not make him a father, it makes him a sperm donor, and 2nd, he was forced to pay by the state, he did not do so on his own accord. And Ginny J I don't know what the heck you are talking about. Half of the kid's genes has nothing to do with him being a father, it just means that he did the deed, then cut out when he wanted to. He hasn't earned any rights except by which the state assigns to him , other than that, he hasn't done anything except contribute to creating him in the beginning. Maybe the stepdad has no legal rights, but it isn't about him at all, leave him out of this. HE deserves for my son to share his last name because he has supported him in more ways than most biological fathers out there do. As for you the "lawyer" Ohiogal, you are both rude and beligerent, I did not ask for advice so that you can go into my choices in life, and NO ONE, even in marriage, can know how things will turn out so that whole
"And she had a choice to wait until she was in a secure MARRIAGE before allowing herself to be impregnated." is both judgemental and narrow minded. The status quo of being married before having children is no guarantee of any security in life, just like the other comment by nikstory. You sound awfully ignorant for an "educated" person because I suppose you've never heard of divorce before. And shame on you people for comparing my son's name change question with naming a pet. You people are heartless and pathetic and I bet you have TONS of friends. You're all pouncing on me like starving wolves seeing fresh meat. I asked a question about whether it can be done and how, instead I get all this crap when none is warranted. As far as I am concerned, Dad has no rights, and hasnt the moment he decided to never send my son a birthday card, play catch with him, call him, talk to him, etc. That makes a deadbeat dad, not if he pays a measly sum that is mandated by the state because he has to. IF he could he wouldnt pay a cent.
So don't get high and mighty and condescending with me when you don't know the full situation or the circumstances, I asked a question, answer the question, and don't give me your extra comments which are both gratuitous and unwarranted. I am sure you all will pounce on this reply too, seeing as how you are all so obtuse to grasp what I am really trying to say. And yes, I don't want the child to be or feel separate or different, or singled out from the rest. I wanted unity in our names. Answer my question please and leave it at that. Leave your criticisms and narrow minded, draconian mentalities to yourself. My questions did not deserve such a harsh response.