What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Kentucky
I am not sure why my thread was closed, but okay. For those who want to read it, it is here: https://forum.freeadvice.com/child-custody-visitation-37/child-custody-modification-not-sure-what-possible-608436.html
As an update - based on comments in the thread I started yesterday, I had a preliminary consult with one of the best family/child custody attorney firms in Kentucky this afternoon. What I was told was this:
1) I am paying too much child support based on the fact that dad earns almost 4 times as much as me. Especially because I took the much lower salary so that I could be home to care for our daughter and her chronic medical condition.
2) My 13-year-old daughter's opinion on where she wants to live IS in fact a consideration in the decision about custody modification. It is part of the "child's best interest" decision, and he said that it would vary by court/judge how much that impacted things, but that my daughter's opinion was likely to have a "significant impact" on the decision for modification. Especially since dad works 65-75 hours a week and rarely sees the kids.
3) Even separate from what my daughter wants, I have a right to pursue a move to be able to care for aging parents and also to obtain a much better job which I cannot do in this state. My ex-husband chooses to stay in this job for HIS best interests - he has been offered jobs as good or better in our home state several times but chooses to not take them.
4) I found out tonight that my ex-husband has been applying to jobs in other states (Florida, Mississippi) without telling me. I would never have applied for a job or made plans to move out of state without telling him.
In two pages of responses to my other thread I had no replies from anyone here who said anything but the exact opposite of #1 and #2. In fact now I realize that Ohiogal is a family law attorney, yet her response to me was "So you want to move? TOUGH". Wow... really professional and mature. I showed the attorney this today and he just shook his head.
There is a lot to be said for earning respect with others and not assuming that you are an 'expert', better than everyone else, and that you can lash out sarcastically to others innocently and honestly requesting help just because you are important. We are all 'experts' at something. It might come back to bite you someday - for instance, if you are ever visiting my fair city, collapse, and need to be hospitalized - you will be at the mercy of the physician who is managing the ICU or ER that day or night. And that might just be me.
Karma is an interesting thing.
I am not sure why my thread was closed, but okay. For those who want to read it, it is here: https://forum.freeadvice.com/child-custody-visitation-37/child-custody-modification-not-sure-what-possible-608436.html
As an update - based on comments in the thread I started yesterday, I had a preliminary consult with one of the best family/child custody attorney firms in Kentucky this afternoon. What I was told was this:
1) I am paying too much child support based on the fact that dad earns almost 4 times as much as me. Especially because I took the much lower salary so that I could be home to care for our daughter and her chronic medical condition.
2) My 13-year-old daughter's opinion on where she wants to live IS in fact a consideration in the decision about custody modification. It is part of the "child's best interest" decision, and he said that it would vary by court/judge how much that impacted things, but that my daughter's opinion was likely to have a "significant impact" on the decision for modification. Especially since dad works 65-75 hours a week and rarely sees the kids.
3) Even separate from what my daughter wants, I have a right to pursue a move to be able to care for aging parents and also to obtain a much better job which I cannot do in this state. My ex-husband chooses to stay in this job for HIS best interests - he has been offered jobs as good or better in our home state several times but chooses to not take them.
4) I found out tonight that my ex-husband has been applying to jobs in other states (Florida, Mississippi) without telling me. I would never have applied for a job or made plans to move out of state without telling him.
In two pages of responses to my other thread I had no replies from anyone here who said anything but the exact opposite of #1 and #2. In fact now I realize that Ohiogal is a family law attorney, yet her response to me was "So you want to move? TOUGH". Wow... really professional and mature. I showed the attorney this today and he just shook his head.
There is a lot to be said for earning respect with others and not assuming that you are an 'expert', better than everyone else, and that you can lash out sarcastically to others innocently and honestly requesting help just because you are important. We are all 'experts' at something. It might come back to bite you someday - for instance, if you are ever visiting my fair city, collapse, and need to be hospitalized - you will be at the mercy of the physician who is managing the ICU or ER that day or night. And that might just be me.
Karma is an interesting thing.