child custody - urgent

[ldg5765]

I am an unwed mom living in Seattle Washington.

I have been in a 4 year relationship with a man and we have a 3 yr. old daughter. Recently our relationship has ended due to infidelity on his part. Prior to the relationship ending I had quit my job to be a stay at home mom to our daughter. I now work nights at a local steakhouse. He is home with her at this time. The goal was to not have her in day care, and always with her parents. He is now in a relationship with another woman and his actions I do not feel are in the best interest of our child. I have requested that he not bring this new woman into our home, to limit exposure of the relationship to our daughter as it can cause confusion. He is not respecting this, after he agreed to it. The other night when I got home from work I found his new girlfriend here in bed with him while our daughter was sleeping in the other room. When we discussed it he got very angry with me, is threatening to take me to court and sue for sold custody.

He has a drinking problem that recently has escalated. He has been arrested for drunk driving, but later the charges were reduced to neglegent driving. Every day that he comes home from work it is with a beer in his hands and he continues to drink while driving. This worries me.

He refuses to move out. I am not in a place right now that I can financially go and get a new place to live. All of our finances and investments are tied together. Basically we were living in a marriage, just not legally married. Joint accounts etc....

My daughter worships her father. I need to know what to do,I don't want to enter into a custody battle with him, but feel his current actions are not in her best interest. Our daughter knows that he had a girl here, she asked me why this woman was sleeping with daddy in "our" bed. Broke my heart. I need some advice, I need to know what my chances are on being granted full custody and what steps to take to insure that happens. Currently I do not trust his judgement at all.

Please advise as soon as possible.

Thanks!

 

[daniel123456]

first,did the birth certificate for your daughter state him as the father?if so file at the local d.s.s. office for either a petition to establish paternity,that of which will allow you to receive child-support payments,in the event that you move out,or if he does,its sad,but sometimes hiring an investigator to do some dirty snooping is the best help that one can receive when regarding an individual of whom says that he has respect for his child,and then brings another women into the same house as the child is in.you can also sue the other women,for duress,and both him,and her for destruction of family,some states still allow common law marriages,and therefore you would be intitled to a large percentage,of his holdings,you can ask the court to seize his assets pending the outcome of paternity,and seperation suit.this will prevent him from transferring any real,or privite properties to another account,or person.untill there is proof that his drinking problem,is a problem,there really isnt much one can do,to state that it becomes an issue of a hazard,if he hasnt shown any violent behavior while intoxicated,or negleted your child,though it isnt lookd upon by the judges of the court too well that a man would bring another women into your home,and in front of your child,while that child asks why another women was in daddys bed?i sympathize with you on your situation,monetaries seem to be the most needed,by those individuals whom are in need of it the most.but the investigator could help,by getting photos,and being a wittness to the facts,assurring that his conduct is morally wrong,and is not to the best intrest of the child.the court can order him to pay the cost of living,including rent,and other necessaties.as usuall please consult with an attorney in your area,or with the local d.s.s. office.good luck-lady.