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Child custody

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RedHearts101

Junior Member
How would a custody battle work between both parties that live in different states? The mother would live in Maryland and the father would live in Pennsylvania. The father wants it his way "equal everything" he wants him 6 months back and forth when the child is born. I (the mother don't think this is appropriate) since I don't agree with his terms I'm making this "difficult " What should I do or expect? The father was gonna sign the birth certificate at the hospital till I told him 50/50 equal everything is impossible and not appropriate and him and I would have to agree to something different. Please help thank you!
 


Proserpina

Senior Member
How would a custody battle work between both parties that live in different states? The mother would live in Maryland and the father would live in Pennsylvania. The father wants it his way "equal everything" he wants him 6 months back and forth when the child is born. I (the mother don't think this is appropriate) since I don't agree with his terms I'm making this "difficult " What should I do or expect? The father was gonna sign the birth certificate at the hospital till I told him 50/50 equal everything is impossible and not appropriate and him and I would have to agree to something different. Please help thank you!
6 months on/off is an appalling schedule for a newborn or an infant ... in fact, it rarely works well at all. Ever. Unless the parents live more or less next door to each other.

Enjoy having your baby, and when the baby is born you can either have paternity established there and then or wait for him to file something in court.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
How would a custody battle work between both parties that live in different states? The mother would live in Maryland and the father would live in Pennsylvania. The father wants it his way "equal everything" he wants him 6 months back and forth when the child is born. I (the mother don't think this is appropriate) since I don't agree with his terms I'm making this "difficult " What should I do or expect? The father was gonna sign the birth certificate at the hospital till I told him 50/50 equal everything is impossible and not appropriate and him and I would have to agree to something different. Please help thank you!
A six month switch would be a HORRIBLE thing to do to an infant. No judge in his/her right mind would order that. As long as dad is living in another state he has absolutely no viable chance at 50/50 if it went before a judge.

Obviously the two of you are not going to be able to come to an agreement so its probably better to stop trying. Wait until after the baby is born and then either file to establish everything yourself, or wait and let him be the one to file. He would have to file in Maryland.
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
And I want to make it clear that I doubt there's a court in the land willing to actually order that schedule against the wishes of a parent.

Not one.
 

RedHearts101

Junior Member
The father has told me going through court matters would be "difficult " and a pain. Apparently he knows no judge is going to grant want he wants.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
The father has told me going through court matters would be "difficult " and a pain. Apparently he knows no judge is going to grant want he wants.
If he doesn't show up at the hospital to sign the affidavit of paternity then he won't even be the father of the child legally until paternity is established in court.

I suspect that he doesn't want to legally be daddy unless he is sure that he will not have to pay child support...hence his desire for 50% everything even though that is totally against the best interest of the child in your situation. What he does not realize that 50% everything does not guarantee no child support.
 

RedHearts101

Junior Member
At this point I believe he won't even show up for court. He is against the whole idea of taking it to court. Time will tell. Thanks everyone for your advice it was appreciated
 

RedHearts101

Junior Member
I also, never mentioned nor was thinking about getting child support that's not my intention. So that being said I'm not sure what's going through his brain at this moment.
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
I also, never mentioned nor was thinking about getting child support that's not my intention. So that being said I'm not sure what's going through his brain at this moment.
Your child deserves to be supported by both parents. If you don't "need" the child support to care for your child....place it in a college fund.
 

RedHearts101

Junior Member
I don't understand why he wouldn't want to be involved if I take the custody/visitation matters to court it would legalize everything and protect both parents rights in the matter to our child. He now sees 0 need to cooperate since I want to take it to court.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
I don't understand why he wouldn't want to be involved if I take the custody/visitation matters to court it would legalize everything and protect both parents rights in the matter to our child. He now sees 0 need to cooperate since I want to take it to court.
Then just leave him alone and after the baby is born take it to court.
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
I don't understand why he wouldn't want to be involved if I take the custody/visitation matters to court it would legalize everything and protect both parents rights in the matter to our child. He now sees 0 need to cooperate since I want to take it to court.
Once child support is ordered, he's on the hook and he knows it.

And yes, I do believe that in his eyes that's exactly what this is all about. He doesn't want a child; he wants a healthy wallet. To him, those two things are mutually exclusive.
 

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