Child support/next steps???

[mlou]

What is the name of your state? ca
My daughter & i live in ca, her father lives in nc. In December, 2003, i began a case w/the department of child support in my area. while they were getting the case started, my daughter's father & i had a written agreement stating that he would pay me for 6 months until the case was underway. he did from jan to june. & hasn't paid since. He hasn't come out to see her since May of 2002. the last time he saw her was when she & i had gone to nc for a visit w/our own money in sept. of 2002. he called every once in awhile & sent packages on birthdays & holidays until we moved to a new home in january. i have not provided him w/our new # or address. I gave him the contact # for the child support case & that if he contacted them, they would contact me.
i don't know where to go from here, don't really have $$ for lawyers & the department of child support services cannot locate him. my daughter has his last name & i can't take her anywhere for vacation w/out his consent.
HELP!!!

 

[BL]

How did you expect him to be in contact if you don't provide the contact information ? It should be a requirement of yours anyways .

You believe it's a 1 way street and you are in charge ?

Now you are whining you can't go on vacation . Dam , if he hasn't and can't contact you how do you think he will find out ?

By the way . Did you just pick up and move too , without input from him ?

 

[jennifer6219]

why do you need consent from the father to go on vacation? my son has my ex's last name which i now regret and i don't need permisson to go anywhere. is that a law in your state?

 

[nextwife]

IF a child is being removed from the US, the parent needs evidence (notarized) from the other parent of permission OR a Court Order allowing removal. Travel withing the US, however, does not have such a requirement.

 

[nextwife]

He hasn't come out to see her since May of 2002. the last time he saw her was when she & i had gone to nc for a visit w/our own money in sept. of 2002. he called every once in awhile & sent packages on birthdays & holidays until we moved to a new home in january. i have not provided him w/our new # or address. I gave him the contact # for the child support case & that if he contacted them, they would contact me.

Dah!!!! Blond is correct. You complain about him, but you, in essence, cut off his contact with his daughter! He has NO way to either serve you, or visit, or phone. Gesh!

 

[BL]

If there is a Court order Stating either parent must have permission to take the child on vacation out side the State , that could be the reason , But really , How in the HE double toothpicks does she expect anything unless she notifies him of her New address .

It's ironic that people come in here and whine about CS and everything else under the sun , and state " MY CHILD " , and unilaterally make decisions keeping the other Parent at bay , violation the orders themselves .

 

[mlou]

he had all our info.

For the past 3 years, he's had our information, address, telephone # and every which way to contact us. He hadn't made any attempt to come out here to see her. I haven't taken away his chances of keeping in contact w/us. He just needs to do the right things. The department of child support services has our information.
Tell me where it's fair that he had our information in the past and didn't do diddly squat, yet we didn't know anything about him. When our daughter would send out birthday/holiday cards, they would come back to us. When she wanted to talk to him and we would try to call, there was never a location to contact him.
Tell me where this is fair that our daughter doesn't get to be in contact w/her father when she had wanted to? I'm not trying to keep her away from him or his family, I just want him to do the responsible thing.

 

[BL]

i have not provided him w/our new # or address. I gave him the contact # for the child support case & that if he contacted them, they would contact me.

by OP

So you want to go through a third Party , being CS Office ,for him to contact you ?

It doesn't work like that . They most likely wouldn't give him your info anyways . It's your responsibility , just like it it his .

What may not seem fair , may not jive with the Laws either . That would be up to a court to decide .

You can't just get pissed off and fed up , and deny his Legal Rights that are Court Ordered .

 

[haiku]

if you are expecting CSS to give him your address you are mistaken. They will not. They are not allowed to give out ANY personal information to the other party.

 

[mlou]

I don't expect CS to be middleman

I don't expect CS to give our information to him or for them to be the middleman. I just want him to do the right thing and to act on his words. We don't have a court order. When I originally told him that I had started a case w/CS, he was gung ho about it and said he would respond and do it the right way. That was December 2003.
Once he acts on his words and follow through, I will again give him our contact information directly.